HELP: I frustrate him? :/

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  • jen11232
    jen11232 Posts: 59 Member
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    I think your North/South argument is a little strange. My BF is from an entirely different country and we just make sure that the jokes we tell are obvious enough for everyone to enjoy. If you're having a hard time dealing with his eye rolls (which, btw, would send me into a mild fit of rage also) and he's frustrated explaining things to you.... well, it just does not seem healthy.

    Counseling? Maybe that would work. Don't settle for someone because you think that there's nobody else out there. Just a bit of advice. ;)

    Best of luck to you both!
  • StevLL
    StevLL Posts: 921 Member
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    hmmm. Sounds like there is frustartion and anger on both sides, but until one person starts using "I feel ______ when this happens, or _______when you do this" the communication will continue to stall. We have to tell each other what is not working in our communication and at the same time be an active listener so the other person is heard. If he only rolled his eyes every once in a blue moon I'd say he was being funny, but doing it often is a passive antagonistic move which has its roots in anger. Ya you will get frustrated when someone is passive to you and then when that ticks you off they turn it on you so you seem the bad guy/girl. I know as this was my MO for the longest time. You both could use some relationship help if you are committed to the realtionship and to each other. If not, why waste time being miserable? Communication is always 50/50. Be the change you want to see and role model what you want. My wife and I have been married 11 years and it's not ben perfect, but lately it's been the best it's ever been becuase we talk to each other now as people and not as objects. gotta let go of our ego to see the other person as a human being.
    Anatomy of Peace is a great book that could shed a lot of light on the subject.
    Good luck.

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