Discouraged.

ampjorgensen

Today I feel discouraged. I get this way often when my son hasn't slept at night and due to teething we were up all but two hours last night. I can eat right all i want, but somehow I just feel like its not enough. I want to exercise (though I can barely keep my eyes open or even drag myself off the couch) its a rainy stormy day so life seems like its at a standstill.

I wonder to myself. How did I let it get this bad? I said I'd never let myself get over 180, 190, and then 200. I found myself at 219 pounds.. I'm down to 203 (haha okay thats what the scale said one morning, but it bounces between that and 206 but I m sticking with the weight i had with a full night sleep with my feet up. my leg swells bad due to a blood clot i had, the circulation in that leg is awful now and if its swollen i have at least a 2-3 pound gain) Anyways Its been tough this week. I'm craving sweets (as I always do when I'm tired) and I am dreading lunch and supper because honestly don't know what to eat. Tonight I'm eating at subway which I do every wednesday night with my father who has dropped 40 pounds in 3 months (so proud!) he looks great. But then its going to the website counting calories ect to find just the right sandwich.

I guess whats discouraging me is it is so much work to decide what to eat, its a constant struggle. And I'm sick of counting calories and tracking exercise. Just want a lazy day. But know lazy days lead to lazy weeks months and even years. So I will just have to ignore being discouraged today haha

Any advice on how to ignore being discouraged?

4theking

Sounds like you need a plan. Having a plan can be so empowering.....knowing you are making a difference and working towards a goal.

Heliconia

I'm no expert, but I have found that I have a few go to meals that I know are healthy, easy to prepare and food that I look forward to eating. Even whole days worth of food that I know if I eat will cause a weight loss. That way, when I don't want to think, plan etc it is easy to still stay on track.

jram70

Take a lazy day. You know it can lead to weeks, but don't let it. Reward yourself for the weight you have lost. Then set a goal and say when I lose another 5 (or whatever) I will have another lazy day. One day won't kill you. If you do not let of some "steam" you will not remain motivated. Maybe so you do not give in to an impulse, say to yourself if I stick with it today I will take a lazy day tomorrow. That way you are working for it and not giving in to it. Tomorrow if you are motivated to work then do so and skip the lazy day. That is kinda how I quit smoking cigs - told myself if I make it today with out one I can have one tomorrow if I want to.

vivapuff

Thanks for your post....I'm new on here and have been enjoying it so far. It's like yet another community of people who are trying to be the best they can be. I love being witness to that. You sound tired and discouraged yet from what I read you are having
much success and belief in success. Before you know it your little one will be fully grown and the challenges you face today you will wish for again someday when the new and more difficult ones come along (my son is 18 and it is hard to watch him struggle with his life choices). All I can offer by way of encouragement is to not be too hard on yourself, you are doing the best you can (for today) and that "this too shall pass". Hang in there and keep on keeping on Jen

Sugarchef

I know what it's like to have one lazy day turn into several. In order for me to stay on track I have to be super organized. I plan meals for the family for a week at a time, and when I have extra time (hardly ever!) I do prep for easy snacks. It's hard to want to exercise with very little sleep, but even a few minutes of light cardio can perk you up a bit and lighten your mood as well. Good luck and hang in there! Some days are harder than others.

slapshotgolf

No, you can't avoid discouragement - its normal. How we react to it determines our success. If your life is at a standstill today - stop and enjoy it. Take a minute to refect and think, and don't feel guilty about it. Commit to yourself that tomorrow can be a better day, and pick up where you left off. You've successfully lost some weight, so you know how to. This is not a race. Realize that for the next little while you will need to be conscious of what you eat, and that's ok - it will get better, Once you get to your target weight, you can have a more normal relationship with food, except that you will be able to make better choices not to get back here. You can do this.

amydray

Medical setbacks and I'm sure having a youngster can be distracting from sticking to your health goals. I have 3 jobs and also a freelance business on the side. During my progress, I've had to deal with the hurdles of coming down with the flu, hurting my foot, etc. The best way I've found to make the food choices easier (which sometimes can be the only thing you can control), are planning a week ahead. Take the guess work out of it, and make packing your cooler/ lunch bag or what have you, a breeze. I know eating the same thing 4-5 days in a row sounds boring, but you find ways to switch it up with your snack allowance, and I always let myself have a "cheat" day. Sometimes more than one. You've made it 16 lbs so far, you can keep it up!

abbyko

I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same way sometimes. I really started on my calorie counting when I found myself at 216. Not pleasant.

I've been looking up easy low cal recipes that are good for freezing or are easy to make with things I have in the house. A bag of frozen raw prawns is great, they thaw really fast and I'll make quick stir fry with whatever veggies i've got around, and put it on some instant brown rice (a miracle in a box) or some quinoa. Make enough for lunch the next day and you're set! Depending on the size a 12-14 count is only 80 calories!! And who doesn't love prawns?

Soups are also a good option. And because they make a lot it's usually pretty low cal. Try a turkey sausage, white bean and kale soup. I just made one with an entire bottle of white wine and since it make 6L (my family wanted lots), 2 cups only came to 330 calories! Freezes like a dream, in convenient 2 cups portions!

If I'm craving sweets or still feeling hungry after eating I've found that having a fizzy drink, like a diet pop or a diet flavored sparking beverage with ice is great. It takes a while to drink, is sweet and cold, and by the time I'm done, I'm no longer craving anything. But you've got to realize that sometimes you'll naturally be more hungry than others and think if you've tried to take your mind of it and it's just not working, have a snack. It's not the end of the world.

Here's a link to a good low calorie muffin. I made some changes when I made them: I used unsweetened almond milk instead (lower in calories), added a lot of vanilla and an absolute ton of cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg and cardamom. They were great. I even added some nuts, but that upped the calories a bit.
http://healthy-recipe-group.fitsugar.com/Applesauce-Oatmeal-Muffins---Whole-Wheat-152898

Good luck!

wvmark41

I'm not an expert, but here's a layman's advice from years of experience.

a.) protein... a good chunk of meat helps the body deal with the exhaustion that is a result of stress.
b.) Deep, cleansing breaths..... good for the brain.
c.) Water, water, water.... good for the brain and everything else.

... and....

d.) Go in the bathroom alone, shut the door, look in the mirror, count silently to 10 and then say, "You're going to get through this. You're one tough cookie."

Your experience is a great example of why we all need to be in great shape. We handle stress much differently when our bodies are running at peak performance. Don't give up. Keep focused on your fitness goals...30-minute walks can work miracles.... and keep doing a good job taking care of your family. You're doing wonderfully.

artemis222

You're right, it IS a lot of work. Unfortunately there's no real miracle cure to not getting discouraged, but look how far you've come already. 16 pounds is nothing to laugh at. Remember that it's not just about weight loss; it's being healthy in general.

As far as the counting calories goes, to keep from getting bogged down by it all I give myself one day to eat a little worse than I normally would. Not too bad, but enough to were I don't feel like I'm constantly deprived. It's kind of like a lazy day, but I still count all my calories.

I, too, am constantly battling a sweet tooth. You should try eating some fruit, like strawberries. Mmmmm. I find that I eat a lot of fruit. Just one small clementine will curb my craving and fill me up at the same time.

I can't ignore being discouraged, but talking to my husband, friends and family helps me through it. And that little square of dark chocolate can brighten your mood just a little. Not too big a piece now. Keep a bar of it in the fridge. I prefer Lindt's bars. They come in as dark as 85%.

Mariposa187

You might not be able to do this but Jump around! Yes, i actually do this and make all kinds of frustrating noises...

Think about all the NSVs you have accomplished. Sometimes these are the most important.

Take it slow. Some days I have to take it a min at a time.

HAPPY MUSIC! There is always some song (TobyMac and Newsboys for me) that really uplift you and get you out of the funk.

Distracting your mind is usually the best thing. I was taught this to deal with my depression. If you have do something for 20 mins that requires your undivided attention you usually forget about your woes or mood.

I dont know if you are religious but I pray like there is no tomorrow. God has helped me through so much.

Sometimes it is just one of those days. Just remember that tomorrow will be better. You want to get healthy and that is somethign to be proud of! The grrrreat days wouldnt be so lovely if we didnt have ugly days like this! I will keep you in my prayers and I hope your day and your obstacles get better. Keep on pushing cuz you can do it! We believe in you!

mommacool

I find I am less discouraged if I don't have to struggle with what to eat or prepare. I find if I take a hour or two to shop/prepare for the week, and I have things on hand that are easy to mix and match, I have a better time staying on track. I find it helpful to keep veggies cut up and cooked chicken in the fridge. Turkey burgers in the freezer (or veggie burgers if you like them) or some chicken sausage. I keep a bag of frozen berries on hand. Fruit, cups of yogurt, cereal and instant oatmeal, single serve cheese (like laughing cow or babybel) and some good crackers, single serve hummus. Cooked eggs are great to keep on hand too. Make a list of "must have" items to keep on hand to make meals easy, even in a pinch. I prefer fresh veggies, but keep a couple bags of frozen for THOSE days. I have 5 kids and homeschool. I never know what will derail my plans. Yesterday it was a badly scraped knee on my 4 year old right as I was going to start dinner.... out came the burgers and cut up veggies and a quick rice mix, and I moved the bowl of fruit to the kitchen table. In the past it might have meant I would have ordered pizza and wings, but because I have tried to be better prepared to stay on track, I did not have to resort to that. Today it will be the beef dish I had planned for yesterday... hopefully! LOL!

sbear867

I've had days just want today "screw it" and honestly I've fallen off the wagon more times than I like to think about. I keepgetting back up and trying again. The life style changes are getting easier. It's now habit to consider my food choices before I eat. I know life is over whelming but you will have so much more energy once you find balance. My daughter is up and down all night with ear infections so I understand lack of sleep. You will make it, but some days may suck. Find easy quick meals you can put together when you don't want to think about it so you are prepared for dRk days.

misslys9304

I know what you mean! I did the same exact thing, I always told myself okay, i'm never gonna let myself weigh more than 160, 170, 180. and once I weighed 185 (as much as my bf) I knew it was time for a change. You know what I would suggest for you is try to plan a small trip or something that you want to look good for. Then everyday just think about how bad you want to look good for it! It keeps you away from food, it really does. Or pick a pair of jeans that may be tight on you now and try them on once a week or once every two weeks and you'll be so surprised with the change! Not only does that help you see your progress, it motivates you to keep going. Cut out fast food and soda. Also, don't worry so much about spending every minute planning what to eat. If you see something you want and its meal time, eat it....just only eat a small portion of it. Eventually you will get to the point where you realize that unhealthy foods are a waste of calories that you could've used for something that was healthy and filling. You may craze sweets and other things, it's okay to have one bite but cut yourself off after that. The small victories add up in the end. Best of luck to you!

olyrose

It sounds like you're doing really good but just don't want to have to deal with one more thing every day. That's fine. You just need to pre-plan (like other people have mentioned), then it's less for you to think about.

I typically eat the same thing every day for breakfast, lunch, and snack. I save them all as my "meals" and then it's easy to add them into my journal every day.

Then I have the extra calories for dinner. I usually leave enough so I can have a large satisfying one, and no matter what the changes might be, I know I'll be able to fit my dinner into the calorie allowance.

For sweet things, I just account for those early in the day and record them into my journal before I even eat them. Thinks like jello pudding or skinny cow ice cream are so wonderful - low cal and so tasty.

You can do it, just find a good balance of recording and paying attention to what you eat, and not having to think about it all day. You don't want to burn out and give up.

Good luck!

LaurieEReid

"this too shall pass". Jen

That's what I thought when I saw your post. This too shall pass. One day, you will be able to sleep again.

There has been some excellent advice here on planning for meals. Remember how many calories are burned by housework, gardening, laundry, etc. It reminds you that you have exercised and better surroundings always make me feel better.

And try to notice little things to celebrate as the day goes on. Your son's smile. A nice aroma. A beautiful flower. Keeps one's mood up.

ampjorgensen

I'm not an expert, but here's a layman's advice from years of experience.

a.) protein... a good chunk of meat helps the body deal with the exhaustion that is a result of stress.
b.) Deep, cleansing breaths..... good for the brain.
c.) Water, water, water.... good for the brain and everything else.

... and....

d.) Go in the bathroom alone, shut the door, look in the mirror, count silently to 10 and then say, "You're going to get through this. You're one tough cookie."

Your experience is a great example of why we all need to be in great shape. We handle stress much differently when our bodies are running at peak performance. Don't give up. Keep focused on your fitness goals...30-minute walks can work miracles.... and keep doing a good job taking care of your family. You're doing wonderfully.

haha I like D I think i'm gonna do some sit ups push ups and go for a jog (if the weather holds out) when my hubby gets home or maybe take the kids for a walk. its that nice cool after storm feel out there (more storms coming though yikes... but not to sound cheesey but life is always a storm

ampjorgensen

my love is jamba juice bars.... and malibu coconut rumm...... but the first is only 90 cals a bar mmmmm

pkpzp228

I'm not a fan of avoiding discouragement, motivation, etc, think about why you are discouraged and address those issues. Avoiding those issues leads to as you put it, lazy days which lead to lazy weeks...

Lazy days are ok. Living a healthy lifestyle doesn't mean you make the most optimal dietary choices 100% of the time or never miss a workout. Being healthy is taking that day off because you need it, then getting back at it when you're ready. Think about your goals and what you're doing to accomplish them. Is your goal to live a healthy lifestyle or to count calories? MFP is means not and end, you track calories and your learn from it. After you've done it long enough you know what works and what doesn't, you know that peanut butter and almonds on the same day for a snack might be a little too much fat for the day. If you don;t fill like tracking you cals for the day don't that doesn't mean you fail nor that shouldn't eat healthier.

The biggest issue I see in these threads is one of the most detrimental, take it easy, don't be so hard on yourself. A healthy lifestyle starts with your mind. Accept that you're goona have up and down and know that every effort that you're making is a step forward.


cheers