life with a toddler...

PrincessBTits

Nothing bad, just amusing things like explaining why pickles and rice cakes don't make that great of a breakfast, or that she doesn't need to buy a case of paper towels.

reesepieces

Honestly, I think one of the hardest things about being a parent to a toddler and a pre-k.. is trying to be mature and stern, Some of the stuff they do and say is hilarious, but as mommy I have to say, No honey we don't say that or no honey we don't do that while hiding my laughs.

A definite hard thing to do!

just4peachy

Seen this site? http://meanestmommy.com/

My kids are 9 and 12, but I still get a huge kick out of reading there!

"Rule #439: If you are thirsty, just ask Mommy for a drink. Do not help yourself to the dog’s water." is my recent favorite.

This is hilarious!!! It's so nice to know I'm not alone with the crazy rules!

vim_n_vigor

cleaning poop off hands that were stuck into dirty diapers after taking them off by themselves! struggling to get them to eat anything but cheese!

I unfortunately have to agree with this one!

healthyjen342

LOL..mostly all of the above...

Voncreepy2

My 3 y/o daughter emptying 6 bottles of nail polish on her bedroom wall and carpet and painting everything else as she goes.....or flushing an apple core down the toilet while mom has the stomach flu, resulting in the clogging of the toilet, or coloring on the window screen....
My 18 month old putting everything in his mouth and eating cocoa puffs out of the toilet or making me think he is poisoned when it was really just the almost empty sour cream container from the garbage......peeing in the bathtub with everyone already in it............

My 5 yr old laughing at anything to do with butts, farts, burping and boogers.........never dull at the Doobie house!!!!

steffilily

I almost forgot this one....

Potty Training Boys 101:

Don't teach them how to potty like a big boy outside. I learned my lesson when my son decided he had to go potty out in public and just pulled his pants and underwear down and started peeing right then. It was one of those moments where you just facepalm yourself and chuckle cuz there's not really much you can do about it at that point.

One of my friend had an embarassing moment like that. Her son, 2 years old at that time, went with her to the bank. While they were standing in line, she realized he wasn't by her side and looked around for him. She finally spotted him with his pants and underwear down and he was peeing into the potted plant they had at the bank!

brewingaz

HA HA I just posted in my blog about my 2 year old son! Toddlers are very busy people who in turn keep you very busy!

mishelnkiki

i dont think this list would ever stop if i were to get started. so i will say... EVERYTHING! from poop to puke to messes to just EVERYTHING on and EVERYDAY basis. but i wouldnt trade him in for anything. he is AWESOME!

BamaMomma

i have a 19-month-old boy....my toddler is a terror! i cannot tell you how many food items/particles i have found hidden throughout the entire house because he decided to hide them. here i'm thinking he LOVES fig newtons because he "eats" them so quick, but it turns out he hides them instead. so now i have a sugar ant problem...

he also loves to be outside. he prefers the outdoors more than the indoors on most days. he's got a great tan going on now. i am constantly chasing him away from thorny blackberry bushes, fire ant piles, snake-filled shrubs, and mud puddles. it's fun stuff!

Laceylala

The Little Mermaid over and over and over and over. I think between the ages of two and three we watched it 3 times a day. And I worked.

Couldn't figure out why the toilet was stopped up. For two weeks we just kind of wondered at it but didn't get around to ficing it because we had another one...Gracie finally says something about maybe flushing a starwars action figure down the toilet. Sure enough a stormtrooper was missing.

The fact that she never stops until she's dead to the world asleep.

Things that make it better when I want to pull my hair out and cry in frustration..like yesterday she called a Bald Eagle a "No hair eagle" It was awesome.

Newmammaluv

Some of these are fall on the floor hillarious!! I'm counting my blessings right now that my daughter is fairly tame at times! Wow... The worst thing I have to say is "Don't poke, kick, slap, paint, color, ride, harrass or otherwise annoy that poor dog!!!" Luckily my Blabbie (Black Lab x Am Staff) is very VERY tollerant and most of the time just looks at me like "will you DO something about your horrible little monster child!"

Laceylala

Ah, I forgot this other major life-change -- was reminded by the greasy fingerprints mentioned above.

I used to care somewhat about having a tidy, clean house. Post-kidlet: The house is a total sh*thole. There are moms that sanitize every little surface and buy vats of Germ-X. I'm not one of those moms.

My house is a sh*thole too post kid...its pretty much do the barest amount of cleaning just to get you through. It is what it is.

Karleyyy

I can expect my two year old girl to sneak out of her bed at night...over and over again sometimes. And for her to get into something and make a mess in the shortest amount of time possible! Like Boudreax's butt paste, my make-up, lotion...of course Mommy should have made sure these were out of reach.

Karleyyy

Ah, I forgot this other major life-change -- was reminded by the greasy fingerprints mentioned above.

I used to care somewhat about having a tidy, clean house. Post-kidlet: The house is a total sh*thole. There are moms that sanitize every little surface and buy vats of Germ-X. I'm not one of those moms.

My house is a sh*thole too post kid...its pretty much do the barest amount of cleaning just to get you through. It is what it is.

I could clean for-****ing-ever and still have it get messy the same day. I feel guilty if I let it get too bad, because I live with my Dad right now. When I move out I am going to have to relax about it because I start college in August..

Jenscan

The worst horror to me. Bar none. Even worse than poo in strange places. Over and above the snot, the constant questions, the noise. This conquers everything.

Hearing the words issued from my very own mouth that I never thought I'd utter: "Because I said so."

ncwmark

Singing songs... endlessly... song after song after song... on and on... over and over...

laurasnyder411

We are just starting the toddler phase. It's just the best when my little one climbs up next to me on the couch and gives me a huge hug and pats me on the back. Makes the entire day of "Don't feed the dog your goldfish" and "Don't open the babies' eyelids while she's sleeping!" all worth it.

lcoulter23

My "toddler" is 7 and has autism, so I have to CONSTANTLY repeat phrases after him or he gets mad. They usually have something to do with Mario. The school bus is not a bus, it is Luigi's Ice Cream Truck and the driver is Luigi, no matter if they are male or female. He will run up to me while I am working out just to tickle my feet and laugh at me and think it's funny after I almost trip over him.

lcoulter23

Singing songs... endlessly... song after song after song... on and on... over and over...

It was like that with the three little pigs not long ago. He would repeat it over and over and over. everytime he got on the phone with my mom it was the first thing he would say. "Little Pig Little Pig let me in!" He didn't even say hi.

jknops2

Shoot,, reading this my 2.5 year old is easy. This night she said at 8, I am ready for bed, put me in. So I did, she read a book, actually looked at the pictures for 10 minutes, and then called out.lLights off, I want to go to sleep. And that's pretty typical.