"You look great as you are" - not entirely helpful

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  • Baileys83
    Baileys83 Posts: 152 Member
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    After 14 years of marriage whenever my wife asks a loaded question like...how do I look, does this make me look fat, is this to tight, do you think im getting heavy, the standard answer all of us boys were taught at 7 years old is...You look great as you are..

    It is safe and polite and honest.

    I think this is a lovely answer, a true gent... I know my other half, or my mother, or my sister, or whoever it is (just to note it wasnt a rant about my other half not being understanding, just a generalisation) means well and I shall learn to smile and say thanks.

    Anyway, doing this for me, no one else :-)
  • teresaq1
    teresaq1 Posts: 53
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    Nice!
  • Cletc
    Cletc Posts: 352
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    and I shall learn to smile and say thanks.

    It's very freeing, I think, to learn to Maintain eye contact, sparkle your happy eyes at them, and say "Thank you"
    :-)

    Other phrases that can work well are
    "I will consider that..."
    and
    "You may be right about that..."
    and
    "Yeah, one day I may have to come back and say You Told Me So"

    You can "consider" it for about one second and then maintain your own path to your goals as you were.

    They "may" be right about that, but frankly they probably aren't.
    etc.

    And I can see your'all's Avatar pics. You all Do Look Great already !!

    :-)
  • supersecretsquirrel1877
    supersecretsquirrel1877 Posts: 47
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    I used to get, " You would be SOOOO pretty, IF, you would just lose some weight. " or " You don't look THAT heavy, you really weight THAT much?!? " and people wonder why I would emotionally eat. But my husband always tells me he loves me and as long as I am happy with myself then he is happy with me. Love that guy.

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