Conclusion: All stores hate me.
hillygrace
Posts: 10
Warning: 1 part pity party, 1 part justified frustration, 1 part laughing at my situation, 1 part hating clothes altogether.
This weekend I went out to the mall with my husband and I was browsing a really cute outlet store. It had both a "normal people" section (as I call it) and a plus size section. Clothes in both sections were absolutely adorable, and I'm in dire need of clothes (I have 5-6 shirts I feel comfortable in, and one pair of jeans). I stared longingly at the normal people section, wishing I could try on the clothes there without feeling like a total blueberry girl (think Willy Wonka), and then I looked at the plus size. There were women with their children who clearly had baby weight (not hatin!) and in the normal sections, tiny skinny asian girls (I'm in Hawaii, not hatin!) then me, at size 12 everything. I felt like I didn't belong in either store.
I sucked up my pride (because for some reason, my brain refuses to believe I've gained weight while my self-esteem has already whimpered in defeat) and stepped inside the plus size arena. I was determined to buy at least $100 of cute, comfortable clothes that I looked good in. With that, I was off.
I picked up a ton of stuff: pants, shorts, skirts, shirts, dresses, and tried them all on while my husband played on his phone outside the store. I grabbed the smallest size they carried there (1XL for shirts, and size 14 for pants, since even my 12's are a bit snug) and put them on, one by one.
The shorts and jeans - I was able to pull them up over my butt without unbuttoning or unzipping them at all. NEXT.
The shirts fit great over my boobs, but slumped over my shoulders and ballooned out my side. Clearly not my fit. NEXT.
The dresses, the skirts, they all followed suit. Not wanting to let that get to me, I ran to the "normal people" side and grabbed their largest pants and shirts. Muffin top all the way.
45 minutes after confidently walking inside, I came out of the store empty handed, and my husband looked at me with nothing short of shock. He knows I hate shopping (especially in Hawaii, where everything is surprisingly tailored to the small asian tourists as opposed to the Samoan and Hawaiian population who are notoriously less tiny) but when I told him I was checking out the plus size regardless of how much I hated it, he expected me to find SOMETHING.
So I walked out of the store, and out of the mall, with a rain cloud over my head. This is why I have no clothes. Yes, I donated a whole lot of them when I married my husband and moved around a lot, but I also couldn't find a way to replenish my closet. My husband's shirts outnumber mine 5 to 1. I tried so hard to fix that clearly unbalanced ratio, but the clothing stores in Hawaii (and Texas and California) apparently have nothing that will fit me.
Clearly, the only fix is to work out, eat healthy, lose weight, buy better clothes. But this whole dilemma is so depressing that it's KEEPING ME from working out and eating healthy and losing weight. It's like when you have a massive thesis due or something, and the thought of having to do it keeps you from doing it. You end up cleaning the heck out of your home and running errands and babysitting your friend's kids and adopting a dog and volunteering at the shelter INSTEAD of doing what you know needs to be done.
That's where I'm at. It feels like a crushing defeat that I KNOW should be motivating me towards a victory. My husband passed it off with "You're just shapped different" to which I, in my head, quickly shouted "NO, I'M SHAPED FAT." It's frustrating, and today I took a nice long walk to destress, but I really just need a sounding board. You guys are really good at that.
Thank you for reading through my massive wall of text regarding the almost certain conspiracy the fashion world is plotting against me. I whine, I huff and puff, I drown my sorrows in watered down green tea in hopes I'll wake up skinny, but I'm not direly depressed. I hope I made it somewhat obvious that this was mostly satire (with a whole lot of "I kind of want to rip my hair out" moments) and that I really just needed to get it out of my system.
QUESTION: Have you ever been at this place before, where clothes, ANY clothes, don't fit you? I feel like maybe I should just give in and get a loom or something. That'd be cool. Let me know!
This weekend I went out to the mall with my husband and I was browsing a really cute outlet store. It had both a "normal people" section (as I call it) and a plus size section. Clothes in both sections were absolutely adorable, and I'm in dire need of clothes (I have 5-6 shirts I feel comfortable in, and one pair of jeans). I stared longingly at the normal people section, wishing I could try on the clothes there without feeling like a total blueberry girl (think Willy Wonka), and then I looked at the plus size. There were women with their children who clearly had baby weight (not hatin!) and in the normal sections, tiny skinny asian girls (I'm in Hawaii, not hatin!) then me, at size 12 everything. I felt like I didn't belong in either store.
I sucked up my pride (because for some reason, my brain refuses to believe I've gained weight while my self-esteem has already whimpered in defeat) and stepped inside the plus size arena. I was determined to buy at least $100 of cute, comfortable clothes that I looked good in. With that, I was off.
I picked up a ton of stuff: pants, shorts, skirts, shirts, dresses, and tried them all on while my husband played on his phone outside the store. I grabbed the smallest size they carried there (1XL for shirts, and size 14 for pants, since even my 12's are a bit snug) and put them on, one by one.
The shorts and jeans - I was able to pull them up over my butt without unbuttoning or unzipping them at all. NEXT.
The shirts fit great over my boobs, but slumped over my shoulders and ballooned out my side. Clearly not my fit. NEXT.
The dresses, the skirts, they all followed suit. Not wanting to let that get to me, I ran to the "normal people" side and grabbed their largest pants and shirts. Muffin top all the way.
45 minutes after confidently walking inside, I came out of the store empty handed, and my husband looked at me with nothing short of shock. He knows I hate shopping (especially in Hawaii, where everything is surprisingly tailored to the small asian tourists as opposed to the Samoan and Hawaiian population who are notoriously less tiny) but when I told him I was checking out the plus size regardless of how much I hated it, he expected me to find SOMETHING.
So I walked out of the store, and out of the mall, with a rain cloud over my head. This is why I have no clothes. Yes, I donated a whole lot of them when I married my husband and moved around a lot, but I also couldn't find a way to replenish my closet. My husband's shirts outnumber mine 5 to 1. I tried so hard to fix that clearly unbalanced ratio, but the clothing stores in Hawaii (and Texas and California) apparently have nothing that will fit me.
Clearly, the only fix is to work out, eat healthy, lose weight, buy better clothes. But this whole dilemma is so depressing that it's KEEPING ME from working out and eating healthy and losing weight. It's like when you have a massive thesis due or something, and the thought of having to do it keeps you from doing it. You end up cleaning the heck out of your home and running errands and babysitting your friend's kids and adopting a dog and volunteering at the shelter INSTEAD of doing what you know needs to be done.
That's where I'm at. It feels like a crushing defeat that I KNOW should be motivating me towards a victory. My husband passed it off with "You're just shapped different" to which I, in my head, quickly shouted "NO, I'M SHAPED FAT." It's frustrating, and today I took a nice long walk to destress, but I really just need a sounding board. You guys are really good at that.
Thank you for reading through my massive wall of text regarding the almost certain conspiracy the fashion world is plotting against me. I whine, I huff and puff, I drown my sorrows in watered down green tea in hopes I'll wake up skinny, but I'm not direly depressed. I hope I made it somewhat obvious that this was mostly satire (with a whole lot of "I kind of want to rip my hair out" moments) and that I really just needed to get it out of my system.
QUESTION: Have you ever been at this place before, where clothes, ANY clothes, don't fit you? I feel like maybe I should just give in and get a loom or something. That'd be cool. Let me know!
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Replies
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I completely agree - there is a conspiracy
Also I 
your brand of sarcasm. Hang in there - you've come to the right place! 0 -
Yep. All the time. There are clothes that are "my size" but I look or feel ridiculous in them. Most shopping trips make me feel the way you did. Keep your head up. Your in the right mindset to do what needs to be done.0
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Been there done that. I was 271 when I started my journey and my sister couldn't wait to take me clothes shopping after I lost 100 pounds -- of course I still wasn't her size and not in the small size section of the store either. I should have been proud of my accomplishments but instead I felt completely ticked off and didn't buy a @#$@# thing all weekend. AUGH -- that sucks.
Forgot to add that I hate clothing designers -- when they make clothing for larger sized people -- they make the collars 15 feet wide and the arms 3 times the length they need to be. What is that about??0 -
Ha, not many people like my sarcasm. I like to think of it as one of my shining contributions of this world. No plans to stop hanging tough, just trying to make it slightly easier on my heart. Being a non-existant size is pure absurdity. 0
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YES! This happens to me!!
I generally do what you do, which is give up and decide to "wait" til I lose weight. However, last year I literally didn't have anything decent to wear to work, so I sucked it up and just bought a couple basics (some decent looking pants and few blousy shirts) in a bigger size than I've ever worn before. Turns out, if your pants aren't squeezing you and giving you a stomach ache, your day goes better.
I'd go to a store where the basics have fit you in the past, and then just get one size bigger. Old navy actually has a nice size range, where you can find cheap stuff in a 12+ to 1x range that looks like its meant for normal people.
Don't fret. Once a few more pounds come off, you can walk into your favorite store and buy some stuff that fits you and that you LOVE. That day will be great! Til then, just keep on going!0 -
Have you ever thought about sewing your own garments OR buying a size up and tailoring it yourself. You can make something look 12 times better than the generic store sizes. (HUGS) I tend to buy things oversized if I cant find anything and the clothes are really cute. If I feel brave I will take it in where I think it should be and go from there. I make mistakes but I never buy expensive pieces.0
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That really sucks to feel that way. I hate shopping myself. I have two pairs of jeans, one pair of denim capris, and one pair of cargo pants that fit. And a load of cute tops that no longer fit and big tshirts that do fit. I can sympathize with you but I can assure you it will get easier and better. Have you tried taking your measurements and ordering clothing online? Maybe that might work out better.
At any rate,good luck. You will find somethings that fit YOU perfectly.
shine0 -
I'm definitely going to scope out Old Navy some more, they seem to be less itty-bitty oriented than others.
Also, I WANT to learn to sew. I sewed my own pajama pants when I was like 9, but that was with a lot of help. Eventually, I do want that to be a staple in my housewife skill set.0 -
:flowerforyou: Oh yuck, you must have felt awful!
I'm not yet at that stage, but I was once at the size where I could only order clothes by mail as the plus size shops didn't go to my size :noway:
Losing even 10 lbs and fitting into the normal sized clothes will make you feel awesome! Think of the fantastic buzz you will get walking out of a shop with two handfuls of clothes bags stuffed to the brim with stuff that fits!
You can do it!0 -
Totally there with you. I too, am a 12. HOWEVER, I can NEVER find pants that will fit my *kitten* without gapping in the waist. I hate belts, and I hate getting crap altered. I want it to fit RIGHT when I buy it, you know? So, thank God I'm in the Army and don't have to think about what to wear everyday or I'd be in trouble. As for my days off, I have about 3 pairs of jeans I rotate!
I love your writing style, BTW, cracked me up!0 -
I've done the same! Also, I have a strange issue as well, because I am a powerlifter. This means I have some large muscles in places most girls dont! Trying to find clothes that not only looks cute on me, but isn't tight in odd places like my back or underneath my arms where my lats stick out really sucks! I found I can look cute and sporty in some particular styles of gym clothes and at this point in time only have a few nice shirts and two pairs of pants that fit me outside of my gym clothes. I know how it is girly! Stick to it!0
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I have a hard time finding clothes that fit me, too. Apparently my thighs are unnaturally small in comparison to my waist, so if I find jeans that I can button, they're huge in the legs. If I find ones that fit my legs, I can't breathe when I zip them. Someone somewhere makes clothes that fit oddly shaped people..that company HAS TO exist or else I've lost faith in the fashion world. Good luck on your journey for clothes, and know that many of us know exactly how you feel. 0
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I think it's something everyone struggles with. No matter what size I wear they will have the smaller size and the larger size but my size is sold out... I used to sew but in the last few years patterns and material have gone up in price and it seems like it's kind of expensive now..0
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I have issues too...."skinny" side= well....too skinny unless I can find a xxl. "Big" side= well.....too friggin wide and looks like a tent on me....making me look bigger than I am!! Sucks! I am very hour glassy shaped so anything flowy looks like maternity on me! Pants....augh! I dread trying them on as won't fit over thighs and hips....when they do...huge in the waist and looks like I have a weiner in front!! Not too mention I get soooo pissed off from nothing fitting I am severly sweating when I am done trying crap on!! Just ONCE would I love to go into a store and grab something off the rack, buy it, and go home knowing it will fit perfectly! Only in my dreams....***sigh***!0
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I love love love old navy.0
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LOL, I totally feel you. Here in Malaysia it's the same thing. You're either too fat for the average locals, or too small for the Plus sizes. Makes finding work clothes, especially, a *****!
Good Luck to your weight loss.0 -
i hear ya. i have a bit more successful finding things, but i totally relate to not looking good in clothes that actually fit a lot of the time and it's usually the muffin top too!! i'll get the jeans and shirt on, and it's okay except for the fat showing!!0
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I have a few places where I know I can order my size online and it will fit.
J. Crew, LL Bean, Lands' End... I can buy my size in those and be 99% sure it will fit.
It's worth going into their B&M stores, trying stuff on to see what size you wear in their stuff, and then having the ease of shopping from your couch... with simple, easy return policies! The best part is being able to try on the clothes at home with stuff you already have. Then you know more definitively if it will work for you or not.
And, yeah, tailoring.0 -
i have to say that i agree, fashion designers are IDIOTS! it seems like all clothes i try on are made for tall, suuuuuper skinny, boob-less girls. i am a "normal" size shopper, but very curvy and (almost) unnaturally short (mostly in the legs) ...im only five feet tall and am in snug size 6, loose size 8, which for my height is big
...so, to an extent i understand what you are saying. it seems like nothing is made for girls with boobs hang in there, and i know youll be happy in your skin. 0 -
I have similar problems. I'm quite short, so I'm in the situation where a lot of clothes simply won't fit me. All the petite sizes around where I live are intended for people 40+, but clothes for my age group are often both too small and too big at the same time - too tight across the chest (I have D cups) but really baggy across my back or waist. Or they'll be too long - the waist will cut in where my hips are, and where my waist is the clothes will be too big. It's hard to find clothes anywhere, and it makes sizing really unreliable. Last week I tried on an extra-small that was too big and a medium that was too tight. It would be nice to find clothes for short people with curves.
On the other hand, when I bought a new hiking backpack it was no big deal to get a pack for an extra-small back length and a medium waist-band. Makes me wish you could buy clothes that way!!0 -
you can try...
Old Navy (i wear a size 24 and buy pants online, but most tshirts i wear an XXL and can buy in the store, and my bust is somewhere around a DDD)
Torrid
Lane Bryant
Forever 21 Plus (i've only seen it online)
Alloy (online only as far as i know)
keep your head up! i know how you feel though...ugh. i hate clothes shopping.0
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