There has to be a less traumatic way to lose weight... no ma

ellelit

ok, so on a normal day for me, binge and all, i usually consumer about 3-5000 calories a day. over the last 7 months, i have gained about 55 pounds. (no wonder). i've always been a big eater, but i am less active and binge much more frequesntly since i started college 7 years ago (graduated last year)

so, i tried the 2400 calorie a day route, and was starving. yesterday i tried the 1900 calorie route with more "filling" choices, and was so hungry, i thought i was going to die. as a result i binged last night and i binged hard. today i tried again with some different food, and lots of green tea, and it did not cut it so again, i binged.

so... my worry is that i ABSOLUTELY HATE BEING HUNGRY!!! seriously hate it. when i was younger we were really poor, and often we didn't have food or money for food, so i got really used to the feeling of being hungry. as i got old and got more money, i made sort of an internal vow to myself, however subconsciously, that i would not let myself feel hunger again. it;s almost like pain to me, it's so unpleasant.

so, that said, do you think if i went from say 3000 calories a day in the first month, and then worked my way down to like 2800 in week 5, 2700 in week 6 and so on, it wuld make the transition more managable? because this pattern is the same pattern that has been happening since was 18. i try a new diet, go on the restricted calories, hate it and then binge. it never stops. i guess it's like going cold turkey. so maybe i can slowly reduce the calories, sortof like being on the patch and it will make it easier to stick with forthe long term?

ellelit

ok, so on a normal day for me, binge and all, i usually consumer about 3-5000 calories a day. over the last 7 months, i have gained about 55 pounds. (no wonder). i've always been a big eater, but i am less active and binge much more frequesntly since i started college 7 years ago (graduated last year)

so, i tried the 2400 calorie a day route, and was starving. yesterday i tried the 1900 calorie route with more "filling" choices, and was so hungry, i thought i was going to die. as a result i binged last night and i binged hard. today i tried again with some different food, and lots of green tea, and it did not cut it so again, i binged.

so... my worry is that i ABSOLUTELY HATE BEING HUNGRY!!! seriously hate it. when i was younger we were really poor, and often we didn't have food or money for food, so i got really used to the feeling of being hungry. as i got old and got more money, i made sort of an internal vow to myself, however subconsciously, that i would not let myself feel hunger again. it;s almost like pain to me, it's so unpleasant.

so, that said, do you think if i went from say 3000 calories a day in the first month, and then worked my way down to like 2800 in week 5, 2700 in week 6 and so on, it wuld make the transition more managable? because this pattern is the same pattern that has been happening since was 18. i try a new diet, go on the restricted calories, hate it and then binge. it never stops. i guess it's like going cold turkey. so maybe i can slowly reduce the calories, sortof like being on the patch and it will make it easier to stick with forthe long term?

ChubbyBunny

Random question....sorry if you've answered it before....

Are you literally hungry, like the actual NEED food?
OR
Is it an appetite thing, where you desire to eat?

girldeese

You should do what ever feels right to you. You may not loose as fast but you will loose by cutting the number from whatever you are use to eating. Don't put your typical binge food in the house!! Buy fresh fruits and veggies and pick out sugar free, fat free desserts. Start small....you can't be faulted for that! I mean you are here and persevering, you have to be given credit for that!

And only you will know what will make you happy!

ellelit

i honestly don't know, but i really think it's a combination. i don't like the sensation of an empty stomach and am not used to even the feeling of a non-stuffed-to-the-brim stomach. i know i have mental issues associated with food, but how can i change my eating if i can't stand being hungry?

ellelit

my house has ZERO bad food in it. the only thing i buy that is not 100% heathly is digestive fibre cookies which are 40 cals each. when i binge i order pizza, go to DQ, order chinese, go to wendy's or stop at the store and buy the food. it's a sickness,a nd illness. a dependency and it's totally my fault, but i need to find a way to do this that is not going to suck, or it wont happen for me. i know from years of trying.

girldeese

i honestly don't know, but i really think it's a combination. i don't like the sensation of an empty stomach and am not used to even the feeling of a non-stuffed-to-the-brim stomach. i know i have mental issues associated with food, but how can i change my eating if i can't stand being hungry?

This may sound crazy.....but maybe hypnosis?? I know this has helped people out there.....

girldeese

my house has ZERO bad food in it. the only thing i buy that is not 100% heathly is digestive fibre cookies which are 40 cals each. when i binge i order pizza, go to DQ, order chinese, go to wendy's or stop at the store and buy the food. it's a sickness,a nd illness. a dependency and it's totally my fault, but i need to find a way to do this that is not going to suck, or it wont happen for me. i know from years of trying.

So allow yourself to go once in a while.....say once a day even to start? Is that totally nuts?? But then you feel you are still getting out there??

obliged

i honestly don't know, but i really think it's a combination. i don't like the sensation of an empty stomach and am not used to even the feeling of a non-stuffed-to-the-brim stomach. i know i have mental issues associated with food, but how can i change my eating if i can't stand being hungry?

i would suggest going to a therapist or something like that for the mental issues associated with it,
but yes that plan sounds like a good idea to me, it cant hurt to try it
good luck!:flowerforyou:

PhotographerOfNature

Absolutely. I think shrinking your calories a little at a time may help. You should definitely try to eat the 6 meals a day thing so that you are never hungry. Split your 2500 calories up between 6 meals. It's worth giving it a good try. Good idea! Pat yourself on the back for coming up with a new idea to help yourself become healthier! :drinker:

GoGetterMom

E ~ You are taking the first step by being here... That being said, maybe it is a combination of those things. I would highly recommend you not only journal your foods, but what you are feeling along with the motivation for eating. This may help just a bit. In the mean time, keep in mind that you are doing great - you are losing pounds, but most of all you are using the site for support. KUDOS!

ChubbyBunny

I was just curious, cause I've noticed several posts of yours were this is a major struggle.
Our appetites are being fed when we get to that filled to the top sensation (where we just eat to eat), natural hunger has been satiated way before then. Also, appetites are developed they are not something innate. It's like when you are growing up and people tell you to clean your plate, even though you are full. They are creating a problem cause they are shifting from satisfied hunger to feeding the appetite, which is a big thing on throwing off kids natural eating patterns.

Anyway, I was babbling....
I think, if that is how you need to handle this journey, then taking small steps is the way to go. However, I would start shifting what types of foods you are consuming. I don't know what you eat to run up the calories as high as you mentioned, but taking a look at the TYPES of food you are "binging" on and start eating healthier. Even if you still are consuming 3000 calories, at least make a good chunk of those healthy. See what happens.

Phoenix_Rising

Would eating every hour on the hour help? Small meals, low cal, high protein, filling stuff and lots of it.

BTW, I don't go hungry either. Even if I bust my calories for the day, if I am hungry, I eat. But I try to eat "healthier" items like carrots and hummus, or rice cakes, or a banana. Not necessarily low cal items, but still healthier than a candy bar or bag of chips.

yoginimary

Go with what feels right for you. Tons of people told me to quit smoking cold turkey - it's what worked for them - didn't work for me. I'm a little at a time person.

Good luck!

stacystar

e--I understand where you are coming from--it almost feels as though someone else takes over your body and it isn't really you eating the food and you are just along for the ride. It becomes an obsession for me--thinking about how, where, when I can get my fix. You turn around and a whole large pizza is gone and you have no idea where it went.

My advice (as was others) talk to some one who is trainned in eating disorders. You'll more than likely find out what it is and why it is--and they wil point you in the direction you need to go. Food is a hard drug of choice.

Just know there are all kinds of people here who know what you are going through and love and support you always.

tonianne98

Hey there - you're doing great just trying! It sounds cheesy, but you are. Recently, I started trying to eat at home more often in order to maximize spending on groceries versus restaurants and also making better food choices. The problem is - my house has ONLY healthy food. That leaves me no way to cheat at all! And let's face it, we all need to cheat every now and then. So, when we're feeling too lazy to cook or want something that isn't wholly healthy, we go out. Maybe you should try having just a few cheat foods in your house so that you know you can get something every now and then. You have to be careful to not eat all the bad for you food at first, but it will help even if you cheat once a day.

Also, cutting back on your calories is good, but you can't go too low (like 1900). You have to know your weight and BMR (basal metabolic rate). It's a pretty generic formula to fill out. ( http://www.bmi-calculator.net/bmr-calculator/ ). It tells you how many calories you should consume in one day to maintain your weight - given you don't move at all. If you want to lose a healthy 2lbs/week, then reduce that number by about 400 calories. As you lose weight, your BMR should go down.

Of course, this calculator isn't super specific - but should give you an idea of where you are.

OomarianneoO

....I think, if that is how you need to handle this journey, then taking small steps is the way to go. However, I would start shifting what types of foods you are consuming. I don't know what you eat to run up the calories as high as you mentioned, but taking a look at the TYPES of food you are "binging" on and start eating healthier. Even if you still are consuming 3000 calories, at least make a good chunk of those healthy. See what happens.

I was just thinking the same thing. Plus you could divide your calories into five or six meals like someone else said. Don't beat yourself up too much. The fact that you are aware of what you're doing to yourself and acknowledge the fact that it's not good for you, is great. Whatever you do, don't give up on yourself! :flowerforyou:

ChubbyBunny

Good point tonni, I mean I always have a stash of things I crave....
I keep chocolate in the outdoor freezer.
Lean cuisine pizzas....cause I LOVE pizza.
I get 100 Cal packs in things like cookies and doritos....but only eat them when I crave them, which isn't so much anymore.

A little stuff in the house isn't bad. I am all about not depriving myself. Which lots of people don't like my attitude. It may take me longer to lose weight too. I figure if eating better is my lifestyle til I die.... on occasion, I am gonna work in some chocolate and pizza.

songbyrdsweet

That's a great idea! You could also incorporate a lot of salad/veggies to increase the bulk that enters your stomach. Hunger is partly mental (appetite--that sounds yummy so now I want to taste/eat it), partly hormones (hunger-my body fat is producing hormones and/or my blood sugar is somewhat low so I am feeling physical hunger), and partly nerves (more extreme hunger-- my stomach is empty and the nerves in the lining are causing my brain to release hunger hormones and my blood sugar is probably pretty low). By filling your stomach with lettuce, celery, and cucumber, (all of which have very few calories)you can help negate the sensation of hunger, so at least you're not battling all 3 sources.

If it is a serious problem, you could consider visiting a doctor for an appetite suppressant. It would be a really good idea to maybe talk to a therapist to help get the mental part under control as well.

tonianne98

Chubby Bunny and I seem to be on the same page!

So, not to beat a dead horse, but we are here to LIVE! Food is not an enemy. We just have to grow healthy relationships with it. It's not bad to eat pizza, chocoloate, or whatever your food of choice may be (my crux is wine!). We just have to learn moderation.

Cutting back your calories severely is not moderation - it's torture. Someone else said in this thread that there are those who can go cold turkey and those who can't. I'm of the frame of mind that very few people can go cold turkey and maintain that as a LIFESTYLE. SO, start small now. Change regular pasta to whole wheat (same with bread, pita bread, brown rice). Hopefully, you like how those taste just as much as their evil white twins .

Ultimately, this isn't just weight loss, but a healthy lifestyle that you can maintain; not one that forces you to binge.

Sorry for the preaching - home and bored tonight!

ellelit

you guys are the best! thanks for all of the tips i'll keep on truckin!

cp005e

One other thing - if you have been used to eating a lot more, then your stomach is probably a little larger (it can stretch over time). If you can avoid binging and having that really FULL feeling - then it will start to shrink again. Eating often might work, as some have suggested - it might help 'take the edge off'. But, for some people, eating more often just leaves them thinking about food all the time! So definitely do what works best for you. I always make sure to have a big glass of water whenever I eat anything - it helps me feel more full at the time, and gives my real feeling of satiety time to catch up. Cutting back slowly sounds like it might be better for you. Just try not to get that 'stuffed' feeling, and eventually your stomach will start to shrink and you will feel full after less food. Good luck! :flowerforyou:

girldeese

Ok, E, I have another idea....you said you binge by eating out....which costs money, so lets say you still eat out once a day, but the other times you think of binging, eating out, you save that money for something you have always wanted?? And you go home and if you still have the urge to eat you eat fruit, salad, sugar free/fat free dessert, something! Anything! I mean really eating out has tons more calories than eating in, and you have incentive to not binge, because you know you will be able to reward yourself with something later?? Maybe I am just talking too much and have no idea what I am saying? But I can't stop thinking that it has to be almost a habit....couldn't the Dr. give you some kind of something to help out for a while? Like somesort of appetite suppressant, or maybe that wouldn't even work? It sounds so much to me like OCD (which I have)....you get to the point where your actions become so ingrained that you don't even realize you are doing them anymore....or you can't control them. Maybe somesort of antidepressant? Please don't be offened byt this I have just been thinking of you and your situation all night and realized how much it sounds like some of the things I do with OCD, and I can't control it without medicine, so how would what you are experiencing be any different? Oh well....that is my Dr. genius rant, and rambling thoughts....I really do only wish you the best of luck though!

dothompson

I think you should log your intake for a week or two without trying to restrict calories, then cut back but try to eat enough to avoid binges and retain control. Evaluate where you can comfortably cut back and try to reduce it by 200-300 calories and as you suggested cut back a little each week until you get to the point where you are losing.

The point is to develop a healthy relationship with food again and keep yourself in control rather than the food. This is going to be a long process, but absolutely worth the journey.

Keep logging and trying. You're going to succeed.

Fitness_Chick

i honestly don't know, but i really think it's a combination. i don't like the sensation of an empty stomach and am not used to even the feeling of a non-stuffed-to-the-brim stomach. i know i have mental issues associated with food, but how can i change my eating if i can't stand being hungry?

i would suggest going to a therapist or something like that for the mental issues associated with it,
but yes that plan sounds like a good idea to me, it cant hurt to try it
good luck!:flowerforyou:

I agree...perhaps seeing a Professional...to explore what's really going on underneath....so much can be happening under the surface as we begin to lose weight and continue losing it.

I see a therapist and I've found it most helpful... after losing a big chunk of weight in the past year...I needed to really explore how I was feeling and what to do with those feelings....I used to eat the 'feelings'...now I go workout and talk about it instead of eating them a couple times a week.:laugh:

Losing weight is a HUGE psychological change for not only our bodies but our whole being.

I wish you well on your journey:flowerforyou:

Katy009

I think that is a wonderful idea!!! Slowly reducing calories will not give you such a shock. I also agree with allowing yourself to cheat certain days of the week until you feel comfortable reducing / elminating that as well. Also, if you feel the need to binge, it might help to know that you have allowed yourself, say Thursday night, to eat out.

Good Luck!!

Katy

OomarianneoO

Something else you could try...

Once you logged in your foods for a week (without rescricting your calories), take a look close look at what you took in and I'll bet you'll be able to say "I could've done without that, that day". Then set yourself a goal. So instead of say...ordering a full value meal at McDonalds, you order a happy meal instead and eat inside the McDonalds. Don't order through the drive-thru...and bring a friend. As soon as you're done eating, leave.

- It can be such a PITA (pain in the *kitten*) to have to park and then go through the trouble of standing in line.
- Bringing a friend and knowing that there are others around you, may make you think twice about going in line a second time, for something else.

Then maybe later you could even reduce that by still ordering the happy meal, but only eating half of it and sharing the other half with a friend. This is just a small suggestion. Basically, just take one step at a time and baby steps at that. You'll get there faster with baby steps than just standing still.

jamerz3294

Only thing I can add is that since I've been logging every thing I eat, AND all the exercise I do, the weight has slowly been coming off. I am trying to incorporate snax (mid morning, afternoon, and after dinner) as well. That way, I don't feel hungry all the time, and I try to snack on mostly healthy food. If you stick with it, your tummy will start to gnaw at you less and less. :flowerforyou:

pinkpixies

Have you tried Overeaters Anonymous? Some people find it really helpful.

lotusfromthemud

Here's part of it, at least for me. (and man, do I recognize my old self in a lot of your habits.) Losing weight was really "traumatic" for me. I think that scaling back gradually is a really good idea. I made one "change" at a time. (my first one was giving up cheap chocolate. . .I still ate the good, dark stuff. . .but not "gas station chocolate bars")

But, here's the deal. It's really hard when you're using binges to mask feelings of discomfort. I had the same kind of childhood issues with food. For me, we would have nothing when it was close to payday, and then all of a sudden the house was full with (usually bad and junky) food. So, I got into a feast/famine binge cycle.

If you've been using food as an anesthetic, not using food will involve pain. It will involve actually feeling the emotions you've been using food to hide, and it will be, to use your word, "traumatic".

That all being said, I think that going slowly and being very, very kind to yourself is crucial for you. It took me three years to lose my weight, but I've been at this weight (or very close to it) for two years now, so I don't regret my snail's pace.

And, you're not alone. Know that, too.:flowerforyou:

briblue72

I don't like being hungry, either!

and, I don't like not smoking, and I don't like doing the dishes, and I don't like cleaning toilets.....

but I'm going to say now what I tell the 2nd graders in my class when they don't want to take a test or walk in the hallways:

there are times in our lives when we have to do things we don't like doing because it's what's best for us.

MFP family, please don't judge me or think I'm cruel.
I smoked for 6 years, and then a year and a half ago, I overheard a doctor tell the woman in the next exam room that she had lung cancer from her pack-a-day habit. I was planning my wedding and planning for my future and realized that to have that future, I needed to be ALIVE. I'll be honest - it was TERRIBLE. I quit cold turkey. I was grouchy, short-tempered, and craving them so much. But I knew it was what was best for me.

I graduated high school at around 150 pounds, and it took just 6 years to get to 215. 10 pounds at a time, ladies and gentlemen. One size at a time. One burger at a time, one beer at a time, one milkshake at a time.

My new husband and I went on our honeymoon over New Years this year and I was humiliated by the photos of us at Disney World and Sea World. I felt like I was a bigger whale than Shamu. And it dawned on me... if I could quit smoking for my health, for my future, I could get the rest of my body healthy.

I threw out the junk food, quit ordering lunch, and ate more salad than I care to admit. Slowly I began to realize that even though the hungry feeling was uncomfortable, it was my body's own warning signal for me to nourish it - just like a baby cries for its mother to feed it. I realized that eating crap was NOTHING compared to boost in self esteem when I lost hte first ten pounds, dropped below 200, wore a smaller size, got compliments from friends, compliments from family, acquaintances making comments. Not only do I FEEL amazing, but I LOOK amazing, too! I feel confident, sexy, and healthy. I could still lose 20 pounds, but I know that I have the tools to do it now. Just like I have the tools to be a non-smoker for the rest of my life.

Sure, I eat pizza. But a slice or two - not a whole pizza. I eat burgers, but one (or even just half) instead of a Big Mac with fries and a drink. I eat everything I did "before" but I realize that I'm going to wear whatever I eat. I'll wear it on my gut, in my arms, in my butt, on my heart, in my liver, in my colon.


It's hard! If it's an addiction or habit, it won't be easy to break. It will not be easy.

I think as soon as I recognized that it would never be easy, it made me a much tougher person with more courage to keep fighting.

You are strong. You are stronger than this. It won't be easy, but you can do it! We're all behind you!