SBF Reboot June 6

mechanicmom

Good morning!

Today I start my "new" routine, which includes rest/downtime, and maybe even naps if needed. I will walk at least 30 minutes a day, may be slow depending on how I am feeling, and I am going to start logging my food again (I think) not with the intention of losing but at least not pigging out. I also need to focus on lots of water. Overall I just need to pace myself, listen to my body, and not overeat!
I also have to work on my house. My 16 year old brother did make a little bit of a mess while he was here, but Alex has been messier since Jeremiah was here. That is something we need to work on!
I'm getting anxious to bring our little girl home so we can settle in as a family before the baby arrives. Whew! Crazy times! I'm feeling good though. Nausea is pretty much the norm all day, especially in the evenings. I still have some pain but it doesn't seem to be as frequent as it was so I hope that is getting better.
Hope you guys had a good weekend!

Still preggo boogaloo!
MM

lotusfromthemud

Happy New Week, pebbs

This week is my "back to reality" week. And I reaaalllllyyy mean it this time. I'm approaching the 15th of the month as my deadline to have a real live presentable, fully cited first draft of the current chapter. I was psycho-analyzing myself at dinner last night and came to the conclusion of "it doesn't matter why/how I do it, I just have to do it."

I also have to "just do" the workouts. My allergies/psoriatic arthritis are seriously kicking my rear this season. I've been through everything in the pharmacy and nothing works, and I am extra tired from the allergy/pa symptoms. Although I've succeeded in getting to bed earlier, I'm still sleeping as late (so I'm just sleeping longer). Still, the goal is 4 workouts a week. Today is Zumba at ten.

So, intentions for today: Zumba, two work sessions, a cooking session, an acupuncture session for more progress on the arm/shoulder/neck/face and then rest. Whew.

Just do, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

yoginimary

Yesterday I made it all the way downtown, just to turn to my husband and say "I have to go home". A few moments in the heat, and I was spent. I got lots of sleep yesterday.

Someone is subbing my 10am class. I tried to go back to bed, but I couldn't sleep - which is good, means I'm getting better. I think I'm up to doing the other class. If I feel good after that class, I'll go to class tonight. If I don't, I will take it easy the rest of the day. I haven't run a fever, so I'm probably ok.

Doing what we can, boogaloo.

mechanicmom

Mary, I liked your boogaloo yesterday. And I hope you and V both start feeling better quickly!

CP, come back! We miss you! And the others who have gone missing too!

I didn't sleep that great. I had some pains in my pelvic area and lower back that I thought might be contractions (miscarriage). I am doing better this morning so I am thinking it was just gas :blushing: even though that's not what it felt like. Talk about being paranoid.
Yesterday I cleaned, got most of the laundry done, and walked on the TM for 45 minutes, rather slowly, but I did it. And I lifted some 2 pound weights for upper body. I will try to walk again today and finish laundry.
I think I am going to San Antonio next week. My mom comes back from her trip on Saturday and then she would have to drive home by herself. I didn't like that idea after her long week of traveling. So I think we might go back with her and Steve will meet us half way to pick us up. I really didn't want to stay almost a week there. I was thinking just a couple of days. I still have a few days to figure it out.
I didn't log my food yesterday. I am trying to be very mindful of what I am eating and get my protein in. Except at breakfast. I just want cereal. I don't think I overate yesterday because I didn't "feel" overly stuffed, just satisfied after meals. I will continue to tweak and work on my "diet" today.
Alex rides the new horse today.

Stop worrying boogaloo.
MM

yoginimary

It feels so much longer to SA (than Austin). I think that extra 90 minutes puts it over the edge, right?

I'm feeling much better today, though not back to normal. I taught my noon class - I don't think I could have done both though. I was pretty exhausted by the end. My voice was going by 4pm. Now I'm just incredibly stuffy.

Today: teach yoga and some light walking. That's enough.

Enough, boogaloo.

lotusfromthemud

I have been very out of it. I think fighting the allergies has just plain pushed me over the edge. I'm medicating, but it feels like I haven't taken anything for them. Itchy eyes, itchy throat, wheezy breathing, sneezing, coughing, the whole package. Ugh. I slept for two hours yesterday due to a verge-of-maybe-a-migraine headache and then slept for fourteen hours last night. And, I feel another afternoon nap coming on. I just went on an errand walk, and that feels like plenty. I got really overheated/maybe dehydrated in my workout yesterday, so except for walking and maybe doing my shoulder/back stretches, that's enough. That and trying to limit my wheat/dairy. I had a sandwich with brie for lunch, so that's enough there. There's a lot of enough going on.

I've always preferred the Italian/Spanish word for enough, so:

Basta! , boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

cp005e

Heya pebbles. MM, wow, so much news! I'll keep everything crossed for you. V, allergies can totally knock me out too. Mary, I hope you're on the mend.

I seem to be taking one step forward and one step back every couple of days on my nerve pain. It gets a little better on the weekends when I'm not at work, unless I have some other sort of stressor. (Get this: as a birthday present, my DH bought me "services" instead of things, since I'm not feeling very productive at household tasks lately. One of these was having a cleaning service come by. But when I get home that day, I found the front door wide open (although the enclosed porch that it opens onto was still closed), one of the upstairs windows flopped open, and I couldn't find one of the cats. Ensuing freakout did not help my pain much! I think the door and window must have blown open because of the window, and I did eventually find the cat, after an hour of searching and calling and shaking the food dish - I think she must have found a wormhole upstairs somewhere - but a couple of things like that are definitely making me see a stress/pain connection.). I started PT for my ankle again, and also talked to her about my other pain. Her theory was herniated disc as well... But the stretches she suggested seemed to maybe aggravate it a bit, so I dunno. I see my regular doc again tomorrow, and I'm seriously considering pressing for an MRI. I dunno if insurance will pay for it since I'm not having major symptoms like numbness. I just want a diagnosis so I can know for certain what will/won't help.

So, that's where I am. I am trying to accept that I may need help with some things (organization, cleaning up, stress management) and try not to feel too depressed about it. Exercise-wise, I am just doing my PT and taking lots of walk breaks at work. Food-wise, well... I think I need to lay off the sweets again. Birthday weekend got me back into some bad habits there.

Ask for help, boogaloo. :flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Good morning,
Is it Friday yet?

CP, SOO glad to see you check in. I'm sorry you are still having problems. I really hope your doctor will get the MRI set up for you and have other options for you as well. I am also glad you found your cat.
Mary, yes that drive from Austin to SA seems to be the longest part! Hope you are feeling even better today!
V, how are you? I guess allergies are bad everywhere. I have had a headache since yesterday.

I stayed up late with Steve while he was working and then I got up too early this morning. That could be one reason for the headache. I will probably be napping today. A friend and her two boys are coming over some time this morning to visit. My house is a wreck so that's on the plan for the next couple of hours. The scale shows I'm up two pounds, but I'm trying not to let it get to me. I'm sure things are fluctuating a lot right now. I do need to make an effort not to eat so much junk and to get on the treadmill more often.
I called around yesterday to see how much a doc appt is. One place said the first visit is $600!:noway: Uh, no. I called my doc and they recommended a doc and so far I like everything I see and hear. Good reviews, the lady was very helpful on the phone. The first visit is $200. Much more reasonable. So I am going to call and set up an appointment. She said they could get me in as early as Monday, which would be great (if they can get me in earlier in the day) because then I can go before I leave for SA. Steve's parents sent us a check for $200 yesterday, so God has provided for me to go! :bigsmile:

MM

yoginimary

Please check in more often, CP. Or better yet, apply for a job at UT and just move down here. It's less stressful than your job, I'm sure (my husband's group just opened two positions )

I know we disagree on politics, and I usually don't bring them up, MM, but every time you have to decide whether you can afford to go to the doctor or not, it makes me mad. I'm not saying I know what the solution is, but dang it, people should be able to get medical care.

V- all I could think was Basta! Pasta! - some strange name for an Italian restaurant - or better yet, how I should look at my weekly pasta dishes.

I'm up to about 90%. I said last night, as long as I'm better this weekend, I'll be happy. I have a workshop in Dallas, and I would be sad if I couldn't do much. I called a place in Houston on Monday to ask about another workshop - they never got back! I don't know how much I should bug them. We were planning on going for a type of anniversary celebration, though Houston in July is like Detroit in February.

Today - teach yoga this morning, PT, yoga tonight. Maybe another slow walk. I ended up doing 4 miles yesterday. I didn't know what to do with myself without cleaning, cooking, running errands, or exercising.

90%, boogaloo

mechanicmom

Mary, we may not agree politically but we do agree that people should be able to get medical care. It would be fine if insurance didn't charge $800 a month for adding family members. But where would my faith be if I had nothing to believe in and wait for? God will provide. He always has and He always will.

Just had to comment on that.

Getting to work boogaloo!
MM

lotusfromthemud

Oh my pebbs (zips lips on health care issue because she currently lives in Canada:blushing: ) MM, I hope you are able to get care, and soon and in a way that you can afford. That is all. In the meantime, my two cents is to not worry about the scale, but nourish yourself and do some movement that feels good. And $800?:noway:

Today I'm taking myself out in what for my delicate northern self is unbelievably hot and humid weather (90 F. . .stop laughing at me) and going to an appointment, hoping that my allergies aren't too bad. I actually had an anxiety dream that I had a sneezing fit and wet my pants on the subway. I lead an interesting life. Now I'm nervous it will happen. :laugh: I'm on the verge of depends. Ugh. If all goes well, I will walk home from the station. and that will be enough.

Enough, enough, enough (repeat as necessary), boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

cp005e

:laugh: Mary, I couldn't resist - I just went to UT's webpage and started looking at the job postings. I found two I could probably do. But, my husband has a delicate Pacific Northwest constitution - anything above 80 and he starts to melt.

I'm still at work (!) but should head home, so I'll post more later about my doc appt.

My family would love it if I moved to Texas, boogaloo :glasses:

mechanicmom

CP, I would love it if you moved to Texas!
V, your dream made me chuckle. :laugh: I hope it doesn't happen to you!

I am having a hard time getting up in the mornings. I'm just wiped out. It's a good thing. I slept for another hour and a half yesterday on the couch. Alex has a little tent that I set up in the living room and he said he was going to nap in there. I didn't know I was going to be asleep that long. When I woke up, he was looking at me through the little door. He never went to sleep, and he never got out of the tent the entire time! I asked what he had done that whole time and he said, "Just looked at the words Play Hut on my tent." No other child would have done that. lol.
Here's the conversation Alex and I had in the car on Tuesday:
We told Alex that we are going to have a baby and said it is growing inside my tummy. On the way home from horse therapy he asked, "How do you get a baby in your tummy?" Uh...God puts the baby there. "But how does God put the baby in your tummy?" Uh...God gives the woman what she needs to make a baby in her tummy. "So He puts the baby in your mouth and you swallow it to your tummy?" ( I couldn't help but laugh.) I was so caught off guard that I didn't know what to say. I was trying to leave out any unnecessary details. I said that God puts eggs inside the mommy which some times He allows to make a baby. Alex said, "So like in a nest and there's eggs, and they crack open and out comes all the little chickens?" LOL! Well, sort of. I told him my tummy is kind of like a nest for the baby. I think that satisfied him enough. Wow. I was so not ready for that conversation! What a hoot! That was one of the best conversations I've had with him. :laugh:
On to goals for the day: go to the store, and if that doesn't wipe me out I will get on the treadmill for thirty minutes. Another goal came up this morning: start packing and going through boxes to organize. Steve got up in the middle of the night and heard rats chewing in the walls again. :explode: That would explain the poo I saw behind the couch a week ago. We would like to move between the court date and bringing Miss I home which only gives us maybe a week in between, and a very busy and stressful one at that. It's the only way we figure we can move without having to uproot her again as soon as she gets home. But everything will be complete chaos for me and Alex too. So I want to start getting things ready in case this is what we do. It will not be easy at all but it could be doable. We could get an email any day saying she's free and clear, come to court!
Oh and remember that goal I had of losing weight or getting rid of my too small clothes by my 35th birthday? Should I keep it, or forget about it since I can't lose weight right now? Hmmm.
Wow I am rambling today!
Newsy post boogaloo!
MM

yoginimary

I think people spend a lot of time trying to get that level of being in the present that kids have. It's an amazing ability.

Except for some leftover stuffiness, I'm back to normal. Yeah! Oh, here's a minor success story: we are going to Dallas tomorrow. We planned on having afternoon tea at a swank hotel - after looking at the menu a few times, it's becoming less appealing - do I really want white bread sandwiches followed by an assortment of desserts? Not really.

I've decided that what I really like to do is tell other people what to do. It's so easy to see how other people should fix themselves. I'm sure we all know what we should do at some level, but I guess the key is what are we willing to give up? Anyway, I was daydreaming about this yesterday during lunch - how I could run a bed and breakfast to help people change their evil eating ways. I could give yoga lessons and lead nature hikes, husband could give meditation lessons. I could cook healthy balanced meals. It would be like a retreat center for the sugar laden. Of course, it would be a ton of work - thus I lose interest :laugh:

Then I think, if I really believed in that, why am I not living that way, right?

Anyway, enough self analysis on the internet. Today: teach yoga, walk, yoga practice tonight.

Public self analysis, boogaloo.

ps: CP, I knew you would be qualified, that was the reason I put the bug in your ear.

lotusfromthemud

Aigh, morning, pebbs.

The "aigh" is due to the allergies, which have escalated into asthma and hives. The pollution/humidity is super bad and I just had to come home from the bus and decide not to go to yoga. I just can't breathe. So, I've showered, medicated, slathered anti-itch goo on and now I'll try to rest and then see if I can work a bit later. Trying to let go and sort of think that it is what it is. But, aigh.

I said once to a friend "take my advice, I'm obviously not using it.":laugh: It's so easy to see what's wrong when we're looking at other's lives and tell them how they should take action. So hard to actually do it ourselves. In good news, my "eat whatever I want, but just one portion" has finally turned in the direction of "I don't want anymore junk", and I've started consistently wanting fruits and vegetables more often than cupcakes. So, progress.

Benadryl, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Mary, I'm glad you are feeling better and I hope you have a good trip to Dallas.

V, I'm sorry you are feeling so bad! I hope things have eased up today. I need to work on the "eat whatever I want, but just one portion", especially right now when most foods aren't appealing to me that I wish were...or foods that need to be.

I walked on the treadmill and got a little cleaning done yesterday. I also went to the store. Today I should try to walk again and get some more cleaning done. I want the house to be decent for Steve when I leave on Monday and it will take me that long to get it that way. He's off today which gives me the tendency to be lazy. I actually felt good yesterday except I was so wiped out that I got cranky by bedtime. I may also lift light weights again. I keep forgetting to do this.

I am having lunch with a friend so that will be fun.

Don't overdo it boogaloo!
MM

yoginimary

So does one portion of doughnut, plus one portion of cake, plus one portion of cookie, count?

I got an email from my mom last night. She just got back from Fort Worth - and both she and my sister want to do a healthy eating week. I didn't mention it at all. Weird, eh?

So, I'm off to a yoga workshop this weekend. Should be fun. Hopefully, I won't have to leave the room too much to blow my nose and get water. I called the Houston studio again yesterday and still never heard back. I will probably blow them off. I think Dallas might have a workshop at the same time - so there! :laugh:

I'm going to try to get a 30 minute walk in before we leave -though, I need to get some special cat food as well - we tried it last night and sickly kitty loved it.

Slave to kitties, boogaloo.

lotusfromthemud

Mary, that is three portions.

I'm cautiously saying that I feel better today. The heat/humidity broke. I think I can handle the curent flare + heat. Or + pollution. Or + pollen. But, + all three = back to bed. I cleaned the bathroom, kitchen and bedroom this a.m. and vacuumed everything in prep for a student, so that's activity for the day. Now on to some discography work. I wish I could afford to outsource this, as it takes forever. I guess it builds character. My other goal for the day: hydrate like crazy. All the meds are seriously dehydrating. I itch like crazy, and I think/hope water will help this. Can't hurt.

I'm so glad you checked in, CP. I hope your medical mystery is solved/relieved soon. MM, be gentle with yourself! Seriously.

Can't hurt, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

yoginimary

Hard workshop last night - can't wait to go back for some more!


Sore, boogaloo

mechanicmom

Well, guess what. I'm on bedrest. Surprise, surprise. I started lightly spotting last night. It stopped quickly after I got my feet up but it started again his morning. I didn't even do anything yesterday. I did put the dishes in the washer and did a light load of laundry. That was it. My mom, always the optimist, says it's going to be fine and that she bled too. Yeah, so have I. Five times. Not cool. So it's the love seat for me all day.
What has been neat is that my cat Nikki has been laying on my belly again. She did that when I was pregnant with Alex. I don't remember her doing that with the other pregnancies, so my hormones must be stronger this time. I read that's what some cats do. I have a picture when I was probably about 6-7 months pregnant with Alex and she was laying on my tummy. She had her arm around the big part of my belly like she was hugging it.

So my goal today: not to eat because of stress or depression. To do as little as possible. I plan to be on bedrest until Monday's doc appt and then we will go from there. Unless things get a lot worse then I'm not sure it will matter much.

Enough about me. Mary glad you enjoyed your workshop last night. Hope today is good too. V, glad to hear you might be feeling a little better. CP. come check in more often!

This bites boogaloo.
MM

lotusfromthemud

Oh, MM, rest and take care of yourself.

I just wrote a lot of stuff that felt like complaining and then deleted it. Long story short, I am very tired and sleeping a lot. I'm having difficulty accepting that that is the state of my body right now.

Goals of the day: eat to nourish my tired body, hydrate and try to do some light exercise, and have that be enough.

accepting the state, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:

yoginimary

Take care pebbles!

Lots of soreness, my forearms were talking to me - just like after rock climbing.

My abs hurt today as well - not sure why- more fun today.

Making muscle, boogaloo

mechanicmom

Mary I envy your muscle building.

I'm not really in the mood to write much. I was feeling better yesterday. Laid on the couch all day just like i am suppose to. Stopped bleeding. It started again this morning. Even worse. So it's not looking good right now. I will continue to lay around today and plan to go to the appt in the morning. So that's my news.
MM

cp005e

**hugs** to you, MM. Take care of yourselves, pebbles.

Sorry I didn't manage to check back in earlier. Let's see: my doc is trying to get me scheduled for an MRI and a neurologist, but nobody has called me back yet so no idea how long that will take. I had a mini-meltdown on Thursday (tears in my boss' office) because of too many things to do and the "stress leads to pain" connection I have been seeing lately. Then I got pretty depressed. Friday was better, though - I just shut off all my IM tools and told people who came to my cube, "I'm not here!" so I could work on the things that really needed to get done. Then, late afternoon, an email came through saying that the big go-live date has been moved from July to September. So, some relief there.

I am still eating terribly. And, I'm mad at my physical therapist - she was barely paying attention to me at all at my last appointment, and kept telling me to do more things even though I said I was really sore. Well, dammit, my ankle is now worse than before I started, and I've skipped my exercises most of this week to try and rest it. We are leaving for California in a week! I haven't done anything at all to prepare, and I'm a bit nervous about the long plane ride (I've been trying to get up and walk around every half hour, at least at work). Hopefully it will be a fun trip. I'm just embarrassed because my clothes aren't fitting too well lately. :embarassed:

Mary, feel free to tell me what to do! My husband tries, but he says I'm no good at taking direction.

California dreaming, boogaloo.

lotusfromthemud

I need a re-boot. Or a jump-start, or something. I've been missing more workouts than I've been getting, my energy levels are at zero and it's officially getting me down. I'm def. going to talk to the doctor about it, but I also need to formulate some sort of a plan. The only one I've come up with so far is "nap until September", and I'm not sure that's the best. I almost feel like as far as activity goes, I'm back to where I started, and that feels sad. Sorry for venting. My body is in a whiny place right now. You know that whole "listen to your body thing?" my body always says "bed." in the voice of a cranky three year old. I'm not sure if it's looking out for me.

MM and CP, I am sending you positive vibes. Mary, I am only slightly envious of, but mostly rejoice in, your muscle building.

Intentions today are:
Going outside and walking, even if only for five minutes.
Two writing sessions.
Lots of water.

Enough is enough, boogaloo.:flowerforyou:
Pondering.