Afternoon Laugh

RKJR925

My Wife just sent me these and I cannot stop laughing

And then the Fight Started...

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace
expensive....so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight started....

*********************************************************
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Milller Light for $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer
would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's when the
fight started...
************************************************************************

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license
to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet
at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and
come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She s aid, 'That
silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social
Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disablity, too'

And then the fight started.....

***********************************************************************

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby
table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking
right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been
sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating
that long?'

And then the fight started.....

********** * ************************************************************

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other driver got out of his car.

You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just
seem funny?

Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!!!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

And that's how the fight started.....

************************************************************************
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's how the fight started.....

RKJR925

My Wife just sent me these and I cannot stop laughing

And then the Fight Started...

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace
expensive....so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight started....

*********************************************************
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Milller Light for $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer
would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's when the
fight started...
************************************************************************

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license
to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet
at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and
come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She s aid, 'That
silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social
Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disablity, too'

And then the fight started.....

***********************************************************************

My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby
table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking
right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been
sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating
that long?'

And then the fight started.....

********** * ************************************************************

I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other driver got out of his car.

You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just
seem funny?

Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
HAPPY!!!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

And that's how the fight started.....

************************************************************************
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's how the fight started.....

Phoenix_Rising

Sending to my coworkers and favorite people now.
THANK YOU!!

WillPillageYourVillageForFood

Very funny! By the way is that your pig and is your dog a bully? Just curious.

Anna_Banana

Sending to my coworkers and favorite people now.
THANK YOU!!

I'll second that.

Fab140

hehehe.....just sent it to my hubby......

RKJR925

Very funny! By the way is that your pig and is your dog a bully? Just curious.

Yes that is my pig his name is Bacon.

My dog is not a bully at all he is the calmest Boston Terrier I have ever seen. he just wants someone to rub his ears.

WillPillageYourVillageForFood

Love the pigs name.....wasn't referring to your dogs temperment, just couldn't tell from the picture if he was a bull terrier or not. :laugh:

jamerz3294

Just way 2 funy!! :laugh: :drinker: :bigsmile:

GoGetterMom

Thanks for the laugh!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

PrincessLaundry

:laugh: OMG!!!! This has me laughing so hard I hurt!!! LOL LOVE IT!

Thanks for the funny! LOL

arewethereyet

Sending to my coworkers and favorite people now.
THANK YOU!!