what is wrong with me????

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jackeh
jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
bad news .... and i am embarassed to say....

about 2 months ago i started smoking again, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME????? i get the eating under control and i have to go substiude it for another addictive behavior!!!!! i had quit smoking about 3 years ago and got fat... and now im back to the smoking now that im getting skinny??? what the heck??? Why do i do this?

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  • jackeh
    jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member
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    bad news .... and i am embarassed to say....

    about 2 months ago i started smoking again, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME????? i get the eating under control and i have to go substiude it for another addictive behavior!!!!! i had quit smoking about 3 years ago and got fat... and now im back to the smoking now that im getting skinny??? what the heck??? Why do i do this?
  • elliott062907
    elliott062907 Posts: 1,508 Member
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    Oh yes, I would much rather see you with black lungs instead of flabby patty.

    You silly woman, stop that!!!!!!!
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    bad news .... and i am embarassed to say....

    about 2 months ago i started smoking again, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME????? i get the eating under control and i have to go substiude it for another addictive behavior!!!!! i had quit smoking about 3 years ago and got fat... and now im back to the smoking now that im getting skinny??? what the heck??? Why do i do this?

    Uh...from your picture I would say you have an "oral fixation"
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    :noway: PUT THAT BUTT DOWN...NOW I SAY....NOW!!! :angry:

    I am :sick: and :brokenheart: and it makes me :sad: like a baby
  • soup78
    soup78 Posts: 667 Member
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    WHY??? :huh:

    What's going on? Really, why would start that nasty habit again? I can understand wanting one or even having a drag just to satisfy an urge, but wasn't the first taste gross?!

    I quit over a year ago and sometimes(only sometimes) I like the smell of a cigarette in the distance. But once it gets close it makes me sick. :sick: I especially hate the way the stale smell lingers on people.....:grumble: I used to smell like that, ick! :embarassed: Last weekend we went out with some friends for some drinks and by the end of the night (and waaaaaay too much to drink!) I wanted a drag. I took it. Just one puff and that's all I wanted. Ewwe. It didn't "do" anything for me except make me feel guilty. ........Don't you feel guilty? AFTER 3 YEARS??? :noway:

    QUIT! You can do it, you've done it before. Remember all the reasons(not to mention your kiddies) why you quit and re-evaluate the reasons why you picked 'em back up. You can do it! :flowerforyou:
  • jackeh
    jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member
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    WHY??? :huh:

    What's going on? Really, why would start that nasty habit again? I can understand wanting one or even having a drag just to satisfy an urge, but wasn't the first taste gross?!

    I quit over a year ago and sometimes(only sometimes) I like the smell of a cigarette in the distance. But once it gets close it makes me sick. :sick: I especially hate the way the stale smell lingers on people.....:grumble: I used to smell like that, ick! :embarassed: Last weekend we went out with some friends for some drinks and by the end of the night (and waaaaaay too much to drink!) I wanted a drag. I took it. Just one puff and that's all I wanted. Ewwe. It didn't "do" anything for me except make me feel guilty. ........Don't you feel guilty? AFTER 3 YEARS??? :noway:

    QUIT! You can do it, you've done it before. Remember all the reasons(not to mention your kiddies) why you quit and re-evaluate the reasons why you picked 'em back up. You can do it! :flowerforyou:


    i feel horribly guilty and embarrased... my kids dont know im smoking again i dotn do it when they are around... and that is how all this started i was drinking and had a few drags which turned into a few cigarettes then a pack.... Its gross and discusting!!! I dont know why i am doing this to myself.... so stupid... ok im gonna go get some nicotine gum and i will start this tomorrow .... gawd i feel stupid!!! But i think i need to get to the reason i do this to myself?? what am i thinking???
  • soup78
    soup78 Posts: 667 Member
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    Why don't you just start TODAY? :huh:
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    Maybe this will help. ALL of my kids smoke. All 3 of them.

    I quit while I was frickin pregnant with the 1st one so my children would all be healthy and all the lil bas....uh I mean.. and they all smoke. I never smoked again, I never allowed it in the house, I stayed away from bldgs that allowed it.....

    BUT My DH smokes, has always smoked, and done so outside.The kids and I have talked about it and some of the thoughts from THEM is that they were partially addicted to the nicotine prior to trying the 1st one because Dad always smelled of smoke. It was not as gross to them, almost a loving good memory as it was attached to their dad (and shortly to grandma who passed away when they were 5,3,1)

    So it was just in my head, had to let it out.

    You know we love ya Jackie.....want you to be healthy.....we'll come visit ya in the iron lung!
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
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    Why don't you just start TODAY? :huh:

    TODAY TODAY TODAY TODAY!!

    We want jackeh smokin' hot

    and smoking NOT
  • soup78
    soup78 Posts: 667 Member
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    You know we love ya Jackie.....want you to be healthy.....we'll come visit ya in the iron lung!

    :flowerforyou: <
    Flowers for you, Jackie! I'll bring them when you're coughing up a lung too!

    :heart: YOU!
  • MargieM
    MargieM Posts: 2,248 Member
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    My boss used to be a heavy smoker a long time ago. But he has told me it's similar to being an alcoholic. If he were to pick up just one cigarette today, he would be back to 2 packs a day in a heartbeat. So he knows that he can never have just one.
    I've never smoked, but my husband has and also struggles with not doing it. He can go for long stretches at a time of not smoking and then he'll bum one from a co-worker and next thing he knows, he's back at it again. I ask him about once a week if he's smoked lately (not to be a nag, but because he asked me to hold him accountable). If you can't tell your kids, can you tell a friend? Ask them to hold you accountable? Admit it if you do smoke and celebrate if you don't. You can do it! One day at a time, just like weight loss. Good luck! :flowerforyou:
  • HollyAnnH
    HollyAnnH Posts: 81 Member
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    jackeh....Quit with me! I need a buddy to keep me going. I haven't smoke for a little while now and it is tough. We could help each other along. :flowerforyou:

    I don't know why we do this to ourselves!!! No one can answer that but us. :grumble: I just know that I have to try everyday to be the best I can be. I deserve that and so do my 4 kids. :heart:

    Every morning while I'm working out I remind myself that this is for me and I keep my butt moving on that treadmill.....and every morning when I am leaving the gym....I fight the urge to go have a smoke. SO STUPID! :blushing: :cry: ....but I remind myself then that I don't want my kids to see me as a bad example. I am done making excuses for myself and to them.

    Won't you join me? :bigsmile:
  • jackeh
    jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member
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    You know we love ya Jackie.....want you to be healthy.....we'll come visit ya in the iron lung!

    :flowerforyou: <
    Flowers for you, Jackie! I'll bring them when you're coughing up a lung too!

    :heart: YOU!
    lol

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