May have lost many battles, but I know I'll win the war!

karona313

Hello to anyone and everyone.

I am new to Myfitnesspal but not in the least bit to weight loss/gain. I have been fighting a battle with my weight since I could remember. My earlies memory of my weight battle was when my father put me on a scale and told me if I make the needle go down 10 pounds by the time he gets back home from overseas, he'll give me 50 dollars, I was six. I cried.

My parents never knew that I am/was a survivor of child sexual abuse at the hands of my parent's friend. Oddly enough, that's around the time when the weight battle started...countless therapists will tell you that the coincidence is not a coincidence at all. I ate my emotions since I never told my parent's. I remember hiding chocolates, cookies, and anything else I cold get my hands on in my room and sitting there, eating them, feeling ashamed. Basically reliving the feelings of my abuse.

I never had a high self esteem and this lead to many other poor choices and experiences as a teenager regarding sexuality. I didn't have an eating problem in high school, my weight was at an all time low, but I still felt huge at 127 lbs even though I was 5'9".

Long story short, many therapists later, two husbands and three kids later, I now again am fighting a weight battle. I will win this war...I've been fighting it a long time and know that I've succeeded and lived through worse, and I know I can win this!! 40 lbs down is my goal I know I will be there before the year closes!

karona313

:bigsmile: Please let me know if I can add you to my list of friends! It is great for company and motivation. I love seeing other's succeed...it is truly inspiring.

Spitfirex007

Welcome to the site! You will find plenty of support around here. Such a great community! Feel free to add me if you want some MFP friends!

karona313

Awesome..thank you!