...And man gained pounds

shorerider

{sigh} Can't sleep--probably shouldn't have had those 2 cups of coffee at 5:00pm but seriously doubt that has anything to do with it

Anyway, surfing the net for bit until I get tired and came across this:

---

God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and
spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and
Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And Satan created fast food. And fast food brought forth the
99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want
fries with that?"
And Man said, "Super size them."

And Man gained pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep her
figure that man found so fair.

And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate,
nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt.

And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and
shredded cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert.

And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and
olive oil with which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak in the restaurant so
big it needed it's own platter.
And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil." And God
brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy
center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour
cream dip also. And Man clutched his remote control and ate the
potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said,
"It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.....

And Satan created HMOs...

shorerider

{sigh} Can't sleep--probably shouldn't have had those 2 cups of coffee at 5:00pm but seriously doubt that has anything to do with it

Anyway, surfing the net for bit until I get tired and came across this:

---

God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and
spinach and green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and
Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And Satan created fast food. And fast food brought forth the
99-cent double-cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want
fries with that?"
And Man said, "Super size them."

And Man gained pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep her
figure that man found so fair.

And Satan froze the yogurt, and he brought forth chocolate,
nuts and brightly colored sprinkle candy to put on the yogurt.

And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

And Satan brought forth creamy dressings, bacon bits, and
shredded cheese.
And there was ice cream for dessert.

And woman gained pounds.

And God said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and
olive oil with which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth chicken-fried steak in the restaurant so
big it needed it's own platter.
And Man gained pounds, and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God said, "You're running up the score, Devil." And God
brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.

And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy
center into chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour
cream dip also. And Man clutched his remote control and ate the
potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And Satan saw and said,
"It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.....

And Satan created HMOs...

Poison5119

bump. very funny!!

mommared53

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

SherryRH

I love it! :laugh: