Help, what is wrong with me?

heidiscool

To start with, I have lost 102 pounds in less than a year, dieting and working out. I was so focused, I didn't drink caffiene, eat fake sugar or have any major cravings. I was motivated and the weight just melted off of me. I look and feel so much better although I still have about 40 pounds to lose. The problem is that I seem to have lost all motivation and am now totally obsessed with eating sugar and candy. I buy bags of candy and eat them within hours. I obsess about food and what I am going to eat. I have already put on over ten pounds in a couple of months and my clothes are tight. I refuse to buy new ones and start that climb into morbid obesity again, yet I can't seem to manage to stay on track. I try to at least log what I'm eating, but once I break down I'm off track for at least a week and can't manage to get myself to log. The only thing I'm keeping up with is exercise. I still love to do cardio, although going to the gym for strength training is a struggle because I don't want my gym friends to see me gaining. I know people notice, because they look at my newly tight outfits and don't say anything. I don't want to gain this all back. I need to lose the rest of the weight to be there for my kids and to stay healthy. Has anyone else faced this? What helped you to turn the light back on?

stanvoodoo

Whats your protein intake like?

theflyingartist

Try using a planner!
It keeps me on track with everything: appointments, scheduled activites, and even snacking.
I know how it feels to be helpless.

RTricia

you're creating a new comfort zone. Allow your mind to recreate the 'new you' and accept your skinniness!

tkcasta

Wow, that is really hard. I think everyone can relate to the feelings you're having, and I can understand how devastating this must feel. But I think the question you have to ask yourself is why are you sabotaging yourself? Is there something else that you aren't dealing with?

Melis25Fit

Looking back at your old fat pictures. I 've been binging on sweet foods lately too and then feeling extremely guilty about it. Remember how good you felt when you were taking care of yourself? Try to envision those moments. You're so much healthier now, girl. Keep focus!

shannonkk

maybe try eating some of the things you have forbidden yourself more often, work treats into your calories, that is what I have to do anyway or I will not stick with it. I will have a treat, even if its a healthier version of what I wanted at least once a week but I will workout more to earn those calories so I don't go over. I cannot live without my coffee and my carbs, but that's me and I am sure you can do it. congrats on te 102 lbs, that is so awesome, you really should be proud of yourself.

syiyi

I feel you!! I haven't gone to the gym for the last 2 months.. & I'm struggling to get back on track. All i can say is whatever you do, don't give up!! if you fall 7 times stand up 8.

kdiamond

I buy bags of candy and eat them within hours. I obsess about food and what I am going to eat.

Ok, so you know you need to stop buying the candy, right?

I have very strong willpower when it comes to my fitness and health goals, but if I have a box of hot tamales sitting at home, I'm eatin' 'em! We're only as strong as our brains let us be...

You shoud make some new goals and rewards. You've come so far already, don't fall back into the same traps. Good luck!

Papillon22

Try using a planner!
It keeps me on track with everything: appointments, scheduled activites, and even snacking.

I agree. I'd write down the meals and times: breaksfast at 8am - Snack at 10,etc. Then I'd focus on getting ready -ideally ahead of time- what you're going to eat. Then, follow the plan to the best of your abilities. This way, you're less prone to eat out of the blue or for reasons other than feeling hungry.

Good luck!

ttrotter1960

What ELSE is going on in your life? Is there some kind of stress that you have been under recently? Have you considered talking with a Therapist or possibly seeing a Hypnotherapist? No I'm not kidding. I know someone who benefited greatly from a couple Hypnotherapy sessions.

What I am saying is this, you don't become morbidly obese (which you were) just because you enjoy food. There are typically other reasons. You made a heroic effort to get your weight down and to become physically healthier. Now may be a good time to find out what got you there in the first place and to address it before it threatens to take you back.

Just my thoughts.

k8edge

Perhaps you have withheld for so long that you all of a sudden subconsciously have the need to eat sweets/sugar. Perhaps PLAN on having a certain treat (ice cream, a piece of chocolate, etc...). Then you will have something to look forward to without going off the deep end and eat an entire bag of m&m's. As for buying bags of candy and eating them... Of course that is going to happen. Don't allow yourself to buy the stuff!

Sometimes if I am craving something sweet I have...
- A glass of chocolate milk with low sugar hershey syrup
- Low Sugar Fudge Pop (40 cal per pop!)
- A piece of dark chocolate
- Fruit w/ chocolate drizzle...

I crave chocolate like its going out of style. I have to treat myself to something sweet otherwise I would go crazy.

debdptg

You are eating and craving the sugar cuz you feel that you 'deserve' it. I think that the only way that I am able to deal with that feeling is to allow myself the food, but in controlled amounts. If I want a bowl of ice cream, I plan it into my calorie count for the day, then only have one scoop (the first bite is the best, anyway).

Another thing you may try is to allow yourself to eat one piece of candy, then wait for the next piece. Maybe brush your teeth? Just a pause to allow the endorphines from the first piece to hit your system. Sometimes that takes away the craving.

good luck - let me know if you need any support

Burls1

Like you said, you want to be around for your children. What is more important, feeding temporary cravings, or seeing your grandchildren some day? It's tough to think about it that way but trust me, hitting your goal, and achieving the weight loss you want to achieve will give you way more satisfaction in life than any piece of candy or sweet. Also, people in the gym deserve a lot more respect than people who aren't, no matter what their body type is. Don't let others opinions of you stop you from being healthy. You've lost the weight before, they have to respect that. Now show them that you're not going back to the old ways. Good luck! You'll get back on track. Everyone goes through their temporary lapses. Just make it that - temporary!

marpeters

I totally get what has happened to you. I did the same, except that I didn't catch it till I gained back most of the 60 I had lost. Good for you to stop right now and assess what you're doing. I have some suggestions. Pick the ONE, and only ONE thing you HAVE to change and just focus on that....
Make SURE you're getting enough: water, sleep, play time, protein and believe it or not, FAT...the good kind like flax seed oil or olive oil. Up your fat from good oils and protein when you crave sugar...it really helped for me.
Hang in there....you have something in your life that you need to solve while you are focusing on this roadblock...be open and ask yourself what you need to heal, change, reorganize....
Good luck and feel free to add me as a friend....encouragement works....
Above all....don't give up...YOU ARE WORTH THE STRUGGLE!!!!

Qhoney24

change up what you are doing if u have not already, make workouts fun and not a I HAVE TO DO THIS TO LOSE WEIGHT... Once you change the negative thoughts, everything else will fall into place.. Been there more than once and once i started surrounding myself with other ppl to hit the gym, hiking, boating etc it made it much more easier to stay focused. When you notice that you are feeling drained from the gym hey by all means take a day off but never stress about it bc that just add on lbs., Just enjoy it and NEVER be ashamed of picking up a few lbs, bc that is just telling you that you need to pay attention to what you are dooing and let go of the senseless eating. But plz do not deprive yourself from that sugar every now and than, which i am sure you know that you can always alter sugar to better suit. But good luck on reaching your goals.. JUST SMILE WHEN YOU FEEL LIKE CRYING

stacymariegurl

I'm sorry to hear about your struggle right now... but that is exactly what it is... right now. You can turn it around. For me, it helped to have a buddy to help keep me on track. My co-worker and I monitor each other heavily. We plan our meals when we get to work and help deny each other when we are obsessing over fatty snacks throughout the day. At home, try putting a picture of yourself when you were heavier where ever you put your candy and snacks. Hopefully, when you see it you will be reminded of all the hard work you have done.

Don't give up, girlie.. you have come waaaaay to far.

melinda6569

First of all congratulations on the weight loss..I think you went at it too drastic..so the first time you had sugar you were craving it from then on..Try to increase your protien and have a free day here or there but just remember portion control is KEY..if you need the sugar allow yourself one piece of dark chocolate a day only and when i say one piece i mean a one inch square..Don't give up on yourself you have come so far..stay focused i am so happy for you and your weight loss and impressed that you are keeping up with the cardio..maybe add some weights..Good luck Feel free to add me as a friend!

sparrows7

You know whats wrong with you? You're a human. :P For real.
http://www.newsweek.com/blogs/the-human-condition/2009/06/25/the-sweet-science-how-our-brain-reacts-to-sugary-tastes.html

Its pretty hard to be perfect when you're hardwired, some people more than others, to fail (on some level). Just realize what is happening and don't buy the bag of candy. Eat a bit of fruit and be done with it. Me personally I can not have a bag of candy in my house and NOT eat it. My husband can, not me. So I just don't buy it anymore. I do however eat tons of other junk food (that I am trying to stop) but I do have my candy buying under control. I was buying those giant candy bars with the intent to "share" them with dh and the kids. Sometimes I did not share. lol

Congrats on your weight loss! Don't be too hard on yourself!!

helenoftroy1

what made you motivated in the first place? Write it down and envision it again. Go back to that place.
I think you have made it to 100lbs and have thought yay I'm doing so well I can relax a little now. I also think like someone else said it's like you deserve it. And you do but not in food and sugary treats. They are making you feel all warm and fuzzy inside for now making up for you losing sight of where you want to be. Sugar only lasts for so long. As I said I think you need to go back and really think about what motivated you before, was it people seeing a difference, feeling better, fitting into better clothes. Think of all those things and take each day as it comes again. Go back to basics. And remember we are your friends, sugar isn't

Good luck!!!!!

Ruchell

Wow, that is really hard. I think everyone can relate to the feelings you're having, and I can understand how devastating this must feel. But I think the question you have to ask yourself is why are you sabotaging yourself? Is there something else that you aren't dealing with?

I agree...I have caught myself in a viscous cycle where I'll see some success and be very happy and the next day is horrible and I have no motivation. Finally realized that I'm self-sabotaging because when we're heavy (at least for me) we're prone to think that losing weight will fix every problem we have. And yeah, being thinner helps, but getting closer to your goal you see that there will still be issues to handle. We get closer to our goals and start to realize that weight loss wanst a magic fix for everything and that's scary!

Good luck and just remind yourself that you losing the weight might not fix everything, but it made you strong, healthy and confident enough to tackle anything!

aprilgicker

If you cannot really control yourself at the store. Buy some windex. When you open the pack and have 2 or 3 ,then the guilt starts, spray it with windex and throw them away. It keeps you from going back to get them. Also from putting them back in the cabinet.

It is crazy extreme, But if you are bent on becoming fat again the mind is a powerful tool to just turn off!
After your friends make fun of you a few times and you can't afford all the wasted food. You'll snap out of it.

Ruchell

And PS good for you for catching it early! 10lbs is slot easier to lose than 100lbs would be again!

zundelag

First of all, congratulations on your terrific progress over the past year, and for seeing that you have a weakness before it becomes a bigger problem. Next, I don't know your schedule or what you have followed for your plan, but here are some suggestions that might help.
-Don't deny your sweets completely that's a nail in the weight loosing coffin for me. I eat "healthy" during the week and on the weekends I allow myself to have candy, ice cream, etc, but within reason. So plan when and what you will eat for your break.

-when you get you "sanity snack" get it in smaller portions or if you get big bags, find a loved one who can take bad moods from you (I know it will happen ) to help you portion them out and hide the rest.

-Back to the loved one, find someone, boyfriend, spouse, BF, etc who you can talk to. When you are having a craving you can go to them and they can help make better choices or work out why you might be feeling that way, or just to say no. I'm VERY lucky to have a hubby who is very supportive and who has thick skin. He was my self control when I didn't have any. He also put up with my bad mood when I got an apple instead of the chocolate I felt I needed.

-If you have to have something in the house try hiding it in the deepest, darkest, hardest to get to part of the kitchen. When you have a craving you can decide if it is worth it to go get it.

-when I'm in the store i see the price of the candy/junk food. Sometimes I start to think of the other things I could get for the money I would spend on the candy that would be more worth it for me. Maybe you can have a jar of money/change you could have spent on a snack/treat that you didn't get and then really treat yourself with something more worth it, like a massage?

-Most importantly, don't stop working out. If you need to go to the gym to get your strength training in, then go, who cares what the other people think? I would bet they have their own demons to deal with too.

Sorry this is long. Best wishes in your journey and add me if you'd like.

kitinboots

I've been finding that being on here and reading the forum helps me stay motivated. Hearing about others' success and determination makes me feel part of a group. Doing things as a group or a team, I never want to be the one that fails, or is holding the others back (okay so that one doesn't apply here) and so I stick to my rules.

AlsDonkBoxSquat

I agree, what else is going on with your life? Have you seen your doctor? What vitamins are you taking? Can you substitute with fruit, when you feel like grabbing a candy go for some berries instead to take care of that sweet tooth? Keep only pre portioned items around. Don't buy an entire bag of sweets, buy a single snack pack. Have good sweet choices available in appropriate portions. keep up the good work, you've come so far, keep it going!

brendalyne

Others have already provided some really good information and advise. Each of us have probably have different "triggers" to binging. And many times it is just as much emotional as anything else. But I want to add that I have learned that for ME, a physical "trigger" for me to crave sugar, is drinking a diet soda. I finally figured out that when I drink a diet soda (never liked the regular stuff), I crave more sugar.....lots more sugar....and I love chocolate and that's what I went for! So, I just had to give the stuff up completely. This may or may not be a physical trigger for you......but I wish you well!

janiedoe111

I too have gained back 10lbs recently. It was really upsetting and I let the mean voice in my head get loud. I need to keep her quiet b/c she adds panic to my stability.

Losing weight is mostly science. You know how the science works. It is the brain and the emotion for me that messes me up.

I recently realized that I am quick to panic. If I go a week without seeing a poundage drop I immediately assume I am never going to go back to losing again. Also, the b*tch voice in my head is usually yelling at me about something. I need to quiet my mind and remind myself that I worked hard to get here and I know the science, I just need to work as hard as possible to stay on track and use the tricks I have learned to curb cravings and binges.

Big hugs.

heidiscool

Thanks everyone for your support and ideas. It really helps to have so much caring support out there. I am going to take a look at why I have such an intense need to sabotage myself because that really is what I am doing. I also made an appointment to have my bloodwork looked at just in case. I am making mini goals to follow that are based on staying on track rather than pounds lost for now.

When I'm on track my diet is fantastic, I eat half my weight in protein and eat plenty of vegetables, fruit and fiber and I feel fantastic. I just need to realize that I can't have some of those things I've gradually phased back in like diet soda at all, it is causing my cravings and allowing me to lose control. I will add some sweets into my diet though, and have my husband dole them out as I can't be trusted...