Family's not being supportive :(

TaberGirl1

Hey, I started here about a week ago.

I wanted to ask for your help. I don't know what to do. My family is not supportive at all with me losing weight. I weigh over 289 pounds, I'm 16 and I realize it's really bad for my health and that's why I'm trying to lose it. I come from an italian family and I'm basically encouraged to finish my plate. I asked my parents if they would get me a workout dvd and stuff but they said they wouldn't buy me one. All our family is obese or on the edge of becoming obese and I feel like they should realize that this is what's best for me. I don't work at all and I can't afford to by my own dvd and healthy food. They just buy a lot of carbs and there is like nothing healthy in the fridge. They almost never give me pocket money so I wouldn't be able to save up, you know?

Anyone please help

TinaS88

You can find really cheap work out videos at walmart for around 10 bucks!! That's how much the 30 day shred is at my wal mart. Also, check out youtube.. there are workouts there, that's where I get my tae bo and some dance ones!!

jalapenos

try freecycle.org or craigslist.org. You can find some free stuff on there.
Good luck.

LaniBaby88

Oh my Im so sorry but what people are doing now is eating what they love but just eating a little bit on a salad plate instead of a dinner plate. Also, to get some workout into ur daily life u can go for a walk around ur neighborhood or jog for a little. OH! and there are lots of workout videos online if u look for them Set up ur laptop or computer and turn it into a mini tv and work out with that Hope I helped. Good Luck! And keep ur chin up and show them that u are willing to do this and succeed with or without their help.

OH YEA!!! Dancing counts as a workout too Put some music on blast and dance to it like no one is looking and enjoy a good sweat.

cheeksv

I was kinda in your shoes once too. For one you should get a job haha not saying you have to but it taught me so much responsibility and gave me my own money. If you can't then you kinda have to make due with what you got. Portion control!! just put less on that plate and if they say something oh well. Go for a walk or a run in your neighborhood. You do not need fitness DVD's to work out! Personally I think most of them are useless. It is hard when your family is not supportive especially when you are living under their roof but, just remember it is your body not theirs. Do what is best for your health and maybe they will follow suit.

PST0622

First of all I commend you for wanting to make a positive change in your life. Changing your eating/exercising habits now will will give you a much healthier life in the future....and you are a role model to your sister, which is another big plus!!!! If your parents will not purchase an exercise video for you remember there are plenty of free activities that you can do....riding a bike and walking are the two best ones that I know of. Start out slow if you need to and work your way up....and of course, always go with a friend!!! Having a friend to push you helps, plus there is a safety factor there:-) Cut your portions down yourself....and drink lots of water!!! Good luck to you! You seem to be a very level headed young lady and I am sure you can do this!!!!

Turtle_gee

Congratulations on making the decision to help yourself live healthier. It is much easier to start when you are young and keep it going then to try to start new habits as you get older. You are part of the way there with the decision, now you have to figure out how to make it happen. It will be harder with a family that is not helping but not impossible. There are on-line exercise videos that you can use for free. You can also leverage outdoor activities: run some stairs, take long walks, bike, and hike. All activities that are free or very inexpensive. Join a team at school. Look in the weekly papers for free classes. Make a deal with yourself to do something active everyday.

Don't let people stop you. Good luck.

margypan

I hope you know how amazing you are! And if you don't, I want to tell you how amazing you are!!! You're amazing

I wish I had done what you're doing when I was 16, but here I am at 27 in your shoes. At 16, I let the excuses of family dynamics (like yours) get in my way. I told myself as soon as I got out of the house I'd do something about it. Then it was when I got a job, then it was when I had more time, etc. I made excuses for over 10 years. Don't be like me--you will find a way And you'll be so much happier for it!

As far as exercise, my advise is to go talk to the gym teacher at your school. I know when I was your age, I was too embarrassed to join a school sport. But most people go into education to really make a difference. I'm sure your health and wellness teachers would really work with you--individually. They'll be making more of an impact on your life than they would for someone who is already athletic. I wish I had done this when I was your age!

But most of all, good luck dear! I don't even know you, and I'm proud of you!

Kayluv1996

im gonna add you.... I have a lot of ideas that can help you. Im 15 and we can relate my parents are the same

elliecolorado

If you have to eat what your family is eating just eat smaller portions. And like others have said, it's free to go for a walk or a jog or you could look into the C25K program (http://www.c25k.com/). There are free exercise videos on youtube and probably other places as well. It is hard to do it when you don't have support, but it is still possible and doing it is a great decision.

TaberGirl1

Thanks I'll try that!

TaberGirl1

Thank you that really made me a lot more confident in myself

Kayluv1996

I'm 15. My family is the same way. I can relate to u girl. Try getting a video game to workout. like just dance 2. Its a workout in disguise.Your parents wont think ur using it for excersise. theyll think ur using it for fun. so theyll probally get it for you. It has a sweat mode that track everything for you. 4.2 sweat points are worth one calorie and when it all adds up you burn a lot of calories. and as for meals. try cutting portion sizes if they are too big. Drink more water
HOpe i helped,
Kayla

get_fit2009

Aw, hon, I'm sorry it is tough when you don't have full control yet. (It's tough enough as an adult!). I am with the person who said walking is free. Be safe about it, maybe take a friend, but walk and do it briskly. If you have a backpack, you can carry it with added weight. You can also work your way up to running. Although, be careful in the summer not to overheat and drink plenty of water. :drinker: Best of luck to you and hang in there! :flowerforyou:

cheree1965

There is Exercise tv on cable. Dancing in your room or stepping on and down on stools. Situps with feet under the couch. Jumping jacks. My dad was a southern cook I was large at that age too. I loved yard work so I would mow and dig and there is alway maybe sports at school. Small portions really will help.

Have faith that it can be done.

kalelwifey

Oh my Im so sorry but what people are doing now is eating what they love but just eating a little bit on a salad plate instead of a dinner plate. Also, to get some workout into ur daily life u can go for a walk around ur neighborhood or jog for a little. OH! and there are lots of workout videos online if u look for them Set up ur laptop or computer and turn it into a mini tv and work out with that Hope I helped. Good Luck! And keep ur chin up and show them that u are willing to do this and succeed with or without their help.

OH YEA!!! Dancing counts as a workout too Put some music on blast and dance to it like no one is looking and enjoy a good sweat.

This is awesome advice! you dont need work out videos to lose weight! i use my laptop and check out little 10-20 minute videos all the time and also you are able to dancing around aimlessly for 20 minutes and kill lots of caloiress....Eat less and you will be fineee! Walking burns calories 2 beleive me i do it 3 times a week!

antonjalceballos

First off let me say Congrats! Youve taken the first step to loosing the weight and begining your new Lifestyle! Second, Im sorry to hear about your family. My first impression is that they are a little jealous. You say they are all over weight. To me it seems like they know they are slaves to their food ( I know, my mother is Italian!) and that they think they will never be able to overcome it. They are jealous that you've been able to even make the commitment to do it. Also they may be trying to "protect" you. A lot of the time diets fail and you gain more than what you had lost. That is exactly why I said new LIFESTYLE!! A new study suggests that if you are obese ( dont worry I am too so I know EXACTLY what your going through) that just STANDING more will help lower your pounds! If your parents wont buy you the workout dvds then forget them, stop sitting down. Stand up, walk around. My guess is that you are very sedentary and spend a lot of time watching tv and on the internet? well stand up and watch tv, walk around the house during commercials. You gotta start slow and work your way up. This is a Lifestyle change, its not going to happen overnight! I've been on my journey to my new life for 7 months now and Im still not all the way to where I need to be. Just stay dedicated and eat conciously. Move more. Add me as a friend and I'll have my friends add you. I've got an AMAZING support system!

teresamellor

hi my name is teresa .im sorry to hear your family will not help you on your weight lose journey .you have to do whats right for you .dont worry when they see how well your doing theyl come round .just give them i little time to get used to the idea ..have you got a bike if you have its a great form of exercise or you could walk up and down your stairs .there are so many ways to exercise without costing you any money .if i can help you in any way on your weight loss journey .id be very pleased if i could help .il give you all the support i can .take care and dont worry everything will work out :flowerforyou:

needamulligan

Congratulations on taking control of your health! Perhaps, the approach that will work with your family is focusing on health and not weight loss. Would a heart to heart with the most supportive parent be the way to start? Calmly, ask for help and see what happens. It's hard to say no to that!

I'm sure there is nutritious food in your house. Watch your portion sizes. Even junk food isn't terrible in moderation. And, if you try to skip snacks and eat slightly smaller portions you may slip under the radar of the clean plate police and still reduce your daily calorie intake.

Finally, our local library has lots of exercise dvds. A new exercise routine every couple weeks can keep things interesting! And, walking is a great start to becoming more active and free!

The key is to keep going...one baby step at a time. Every little thing you do is progress and moves you toward your goal. Don't give up and keep logging everything! Good luck! You CAN do this!

starryheart83

First of all...congrats for wanting to change your life around now! I wish that I had done so 12 years ago when I was 16 instead of doing it now at 28 but I suppose it's better late than never . It can be really overwhelming especially when people are not supportive in your family and it's even harder when you live with them.

Just a piece of advice, maybe sit down with your parents and try to talk to them about you wanting to lose weight and how you feel about yourself and why you want to make the changes you do. It might help them to realize that you are not happy with yourself, as most parents want their children to be happy! I too come from a family that loves to eat and it is hard to break that cycle!

There are ways to lose weight without spending lots of money. With food, trying smaller portions, eating on smaller plates ( I know it sounds silly), and cutting out junk food slowly, will help! As for exercise...I know that there are tons of ways to exercise without spending money. You should check out your local library, I know mine has many different exercise dvds and you can easily switch up your exercise routine that way. Or as others have suggested you can find exercise shows on tv or even on youtube!

The biggest thing is to not give up even if you have obstacles in your way, just keep going!

Goodluck!

songbyrdsweet

Can you get a job? I started working at a kennel at 14 and made sooo much money! Then at 16 I started working retail and I worked until I was 22 when I entered grad school. I have never had to rely on my parents for anything I wanted, even food no one else would eat. Losing weight doesn't have to be costly, but having some pocket change helps to get good shoes and such. Then your health is not in someone else's hands.

tessiebess

Kudos to you for taking the reins on your life. It's really too bad that you're in an environment that is so detrimental to your health. I am 100% Italian. I understand loving food and constantly being around family who loves food. I agree with some of the other posts that pitching the idea to your family as "wanting to be healthy" rather than "weight loss" may help them understand what your goals are.

There are ways that you can be healthy without spending money. I think the real key to weight loss (food-wise) is portion control. You at least can control that no matter what kind of food you are faced with. Keep an eye on what is in the food you're eating. You may be surprised to find good nutrients where you least expect them. You can get some great nutrients from foods that most people keep around the house like eggs, milk, or peanut butter for example (all have great amounts of protein)!

As far as exercise goes, a lot of websites have different workouts you can try without needing to buy a video or any equipment. I am a big fan of womenshealthmag.com. They have workouts, nutrition tips, and a bunch of other helpful stuff on their website. If you want something more instructional, youtube definitely has videos for free that you can follow.

~tessiebess

along21291

I would try some of leslie sansone's workouts. Some of them are up on youtube and they are a fun and easy way to get yourself to start exercising and they can be done anytime in your own room. Good luck and I wish you the best!

TaberGirl1

You can find really cheap work out videos at walmart for around 10 bucks!! That's how much the 30 day shred is at my wal mart. Also, check out youtube.. there are workouts there, that's where I get my tae bo and some dance ones!!

Okay Thanks!

TaberGirl1

Kudos to you for taking the reins on your life. It's really too bad that you're in an environment that is so detrimental to your health. I am 100% Italian. I understand loving food and constantly being around family who loves food. I agree with some of the other posts that pitching the idea to your family as "wanting to be healthy" rather than "weight loss" may help them understand what your goals are.

There are ways that you can be healthy without spending money. I think the real key to weight loss (food-wise) is portion control. You at least can control that no matter what kind of food you are faced with. Keep an eye on what is in the food you're eating. You may be surprised to find good nutrients where you least expect them. You can get some great nutrients from foods that most people keep around the house like eggs, milk, or peanut butter for example (all have great amounts of protein)!

As far as exercise goes, a lot of websites have different workouts you can try without needing to buy a video or any equipment. I am a big fan of womenshealthmag.com. They have workouts, nutrition tips, and a bunch of other helpful stuff on their website. If you want something more instructional, youtube definitely has videos for free that you can follow.

~tessiebess

Thanks for all of the options!

TaberGirl1

try freecycle.org or craigslist.org. You can find some free stuff on there.
Good luck.

Okay thanks I'll try it

cheshirechic

You're so mature and amazing for taking control of your life. Since you have to finish everything that's on your plate in theory, can you make your plate up yourself? You can fill it with veggies and limit pasta. The veggies will take up a lot more volume, too. Think about the things that you can control (like what's on your plate, what you eat at school, if you walk to a friend's house or get a ride, etc.). It's hard when your family equates food with love-- mine definitely still does, and I'm 26. If I go to my parents' house, and I don't eat the blueberry pie that my mom made, "special" just because I was visiting, I'll get a horrible guilt trip. I know that part of it is me, and it's taken me this long to either 1. have a teeny little piece or 2. tell her that I appreciate her effort and love her very much, but that I'm working very hard, and it isn't a personal attack on her.

Know that there's a very supportive community out here. Hopefully your family will come around when they see how many positive changes you've made!

cedarbrook

Heard. if ya need daily encouragement add me. Im on a mission and will try and help motivate as much as possible