Obese Parents (Or Family)

kateistoned

I come from an extremely overweight family.

To elaborate: My mom is about 5'10" and over 300 pounds (I'd guess 350) - recently she's been having health problems related to obesity.My sister is about 5'9" and 225. My maternal grandpa died of a heart attack due to obesity (also had diabetes). My dad is 5'10" and before my parents got divorced he was 350 pounds (he began running after his dad's heart attack and is now super fit). My paternal grandpa has had 2 heart attacks (although not obese, has terrible high blood pressure and heart disease). My paternal grandpa and my aunt are both around 5 feet and over 200 pounds. Heck, at my highest weight (I'm 5'8"), I was close to 215.

I truly worry about their health and I want to help. I want my mom to live a long time but she's already showing signs of serious heart problems. My grandma (my om's mom) found my grandpa (mom's dad) dead from a heart attack and one of my biggest fears is that same thing happening to my mom.

So my questions for you: How can I help them? Has anyone been in a similar situation (either on the obese side or as a concerned family member)?

I want to be able to talk to my mom about it as she is only gaining weight and things are only getting worse but I love her so much and would never want to hurt her (I know what it is like to be fat, you don't need people to remind you about it).

I'm just really lost on what to do and I'm really scared for her.

Codefox

I wish I could help you. Its a hard fight when its people you love. My brother and I are having that battle with my parents right now and mostly my dad. He's probably in the obese category though not to the degree of your parents I don't think. 6'1" and probably 250 - 260 at least (no real idea). He gave himself diabetes with his miserable eating habits and even with diabetes he can't keep away from foods that are killing him. We've been fighting with my parents now for a year to try and find something that will make them want to change but that's what it comes down to. They have to want to change. If living longer to be with the family isn't enough to make someone change their eating habits though then I don't know what will. I hate that a McDonald's hamburger is more important than seeing his future grandkids.

Good luck...its not an easy battle. Wish I could say otherwise.

mostein

It was interesting to come across this because just yesterday my sister and I were talking about our concern for our obese mom. My moms side of the family is pretty much all overweight-obese and it is really hard to know how to help. My sister is always telling my mom to go to the doctor (because the last time she went was 15 years ago!) but she won't. She is embarassed to have someone see her I think and thinks they will just tell her she is overweight but won't offer any help (which is what the last doctor did). I try to take a less in your face approach and have just let my mom know that I think she should go to the doctor but it is her life.
I don't have any advice for you I just wanted you to know you are not alone, I too am scared for all my family members that are overweight-obese but especially for my mom as she is the only parent in my life.

DanaKinzer

Well, with the family history you just gave, it sounds as though your family may believe obesity is genetic. While genetics can play a part in obesity, I don't believe that it automatically determines it. It just means losing weight may be a bit more difficult. In my opinion, the very best way that you can help them is to prove to them that obesity is not genetic. Get to your goal weight, and STAY there. Then invite your family to do things.

"Hey mom, wanna go walk around the mall?" "Hey sis, wanna go to the pool?" As your family sees how easily you can walk without breathing difficulties, without over heating, etc, they're going to start realizing it's possible for them too. As they see your beautiful body moving effortlessly, they are going to want that too. Then it's just a matter of continuing to invite them to do active type activities! Disguise exercise as something FUN and they won't even know they're doing it.