The fattest plates leave the deepest scars...

Eats_With_A_Fist

I hit a milestone today. I did something that I almost never do when it comes to food. When I started feeling full at lunch...I threw a big chunk of my food away because I knew it wouldn't keep for later. I'm torn by it. It feels like both a victory and a loss somehow.

I really don't like it when people blame problems they've caused for themselves on other people. Like my weight...it's my burden, my fault. I did it. But I realized something today when I was bothered by throwing the leftovers away (a ridiculous amount of rice and a MUCH bigger than necessary baked potato from a local restaurant.)...that particular struggle is just partially my fault.

I've heard that lovely cliche since I was a kid..."Finish what's on your plate. There are starving people in the world." I never could figure out how my eating everything on my plate made those starving people some how less starving, or why there were starving people at all when they were certainly welcome to take my broccoli. I understand now of course, that the more we overeat/throw away perfectly good food, the less there will be for others. (Theres a whole supply/demand argument just waiting to be had here.)

I also have heard (whether by my parents or by other parents I can't remember), "You can eat as much as you like, as long as you finish it all." Talk about a license to glut! I've travelled a lot, and I've seen hungry people in different parts of the world, and personally stepped in to help where I could, but for some reason, when I'm faced with food on my plate, I feel almost a responsibility to eat it all, no matter how much is left, nor how full I feel. As far as starving people go...it's not going to help them either way. The way to help them would be to have prepared/gotten smaller portions in the first place, or to donate to an organization that specifically helps them. But the guilt trip is still there.

"Eat everything on your plate. There are starving people in the world." Well Ma, how bout you help me and the starving people both out and not put so dang much on the plate in the first place. I guess the word of the day is: smallerplates. (Yeah I know, I just couldn't think of a single word that meant "smaller plates".) If this is a struggle you face, like I do...go with smaller plates and less food, and when ordering out get a to go box, or just bite the bullet and leave it behind. Oh and help some starving people too....that's always good.

BigBoneSista

Love this. You really hit the nail on the head. We have been programmed from childhood. The saying I heard was "waste not, want not". Go figure. If you don't eat it all you won't ever get any again. Now thats something to tell a child because you decided to give them more food than they can fit in their little tummies. My family has been using smaller plates since January and we've seen a huge difference in everyone's weight.

tawojcik

My problem is eating out. I haven't done it yet, but I have decided that I am going to get my "to go" box before I eat....divide up the portions (putting what I don't want to eat in the box), and then eat. Out of sight, out of mind perhaps?

petchonka82

Nicely written!

sla0814

Such a great post! I have the SAME guilt when I throw things away. At the moment I throw the food in the garbage, I picture some hungry child either the next town over or around the world just wishing he/she could have that...My parents said the same thing and I'm having to deal with that now.

And another thing is weird...when my plate is NOT filled from all sides it feels weird too!

chrissym78

I feel your pain! Great job throwing it out!!

hroush

I love my smaller plates and bowls. If I eat out, I like to try to order something that I know will keep well and then only have half.

I am also one of those people that cannot waste food. I get around this by eating smaller portions and then saving the rest for another meal. I really would rather burn the food off than to throw it out.

HaleyAlli

AMEN!!!

StaceyL76

We eat off salad plates in my house. I gave all of the larger plate but one away... Same idea as what you said. Nice post. I believe many do struggle with the need to clean the plate.. my husband has the same issue.

BigBoneSista

My problem is eating out. I haven't done it yet, but I have decided that I am going to get my "to go" box before I eat....divide up the portions (putting what I don't want to eat in the box), and then eat. Out of sight, out of mind perhaps?

I do this also.

marji4x

I hear you! I try to follow the following philosophy:

I don't WANT to waste food. I should only buy/prepare what I know I can eat. I will inevitably sometimes buy/ prepare too much. Sometimes it won't keep. I have just wasted time/money. I refuse to compound this waste by adding unneeded food to my body.

We don't LIKE to waste but isn't it better to waste and toss than to force feed yourself to the detriment of your health? I think waste is inevitable sometimes. We should of course try to plan not to waste....but when waste does occur, just stuff it in the trash not in your mouth.

Solat37_Neil

Dude, I'm exactly the same.. I was brought up to NEVER waste food and it's so deeply ingrained in me now that I force myself to finish every last damn morsel on my plate. So at the start of my journey I told my wife to give me portions the same size as hers. When I grab my dinner plate now I look at it and think "No way is that gonna fill me up" but guess what?? It does.

kobzal

I hear you! I have also been brought up to not waste food and eat everything on my plate.

MFP really made me look at portion sizes. Now I weigh just about everything I eat. Since doing this, I have gotten better at buying correct amounts of food and finding not only do I have little to no waste now, but I am saving money as well!

lbetancourt

I am always disgusted by the large portions served at restaurants.

kittyloo123

i am the exact same way. I hate to waste food. Like many others, i use the smaller plates at home, and luckily i live in a small town, so there are none of those fabulous fatty chain resturants.
I usually will only go, where i know what the menu is, and if i can make a good choice on it. Didn't eat out that much this last year.

Eats_With_A_Fist

[tawojcik "but I have decided that I am going to get my "to go" box before I eat....divide up the portions (putting what I don't want to eat in the box), and then eat. Out of sight, out of mind perhaps?"]

Awesome idea! It's safe to just assume they're going to serve you too much!


[sla0814 "At the moment I throw the food in the garbage, I picture some hungry child either the next town over or around the world just wishing he/she could have that..."]

Exactly! I picture that exact same thing and it sucks!


[marji4x "We don't LIKE to waste but isn't it better to waste and toss than to force feed yourself to the detriment of your health? I think waste is inevitable sometimes. We should of course try to plan not to waste....but when waste does occur, just stuff it in the trash not in your mouth."]

It's absolutely better to chuck it I think! The idea of waste...on the scale that we tend to do so in the west, really pisses me off. I read a news article this morning about a 1,000,000+ calorie, $5,000, 777 lb. cheese burger that is for sale in a restaurant out in California I think. To think about roughly more than 2/3 of the world living in poverty and to see something like that, sucks! For us normally though, waste can be cut out by planning as much as possible, but at the end of a meal, when there's already too much food left, it's better to throw it away if it can't be reused later.


[Solat37_Neil "When I grab my dinner plate now I look at it and think "No way is that gonna fill me up" but guess what?? It does."]

I think if we try to assume that and give it a shot, it's much better. Eating a little and then going back for more ONLY if you're still hungry, will go a long way to curbing the desire to over eat.

laurelj2001

Good going on throwing it out. I really enjoy hearing how others handle situations.

27strange

Yep, so true. We are programmed. And for kids it is important to teach them to clean their plates in the sense that they are getting a well balanced meal (i.e. eat those salad greens or broccoli, etc before you can go play). But when we were kids our parents were controlling our portions and our plates weren't typically so big that we overindulge by eating it all ---its more of a lesson of learning to eat the various types of foods, even the vegetables we didn't like. But that "eat it all, starving people....blah blah" that we heard growing up stuck with us so that when we go out to eat whether it be cheap fast food or a $50 steak we feel we must finish it all in order to not waste it or to get what we paid for. Its really dumb thinking. I can choose to clean the plate and let it go to my hips or it can be tossed out. The only difference is the first makes me fat. Getting over the wasteful mentality is the biggest deal. I like what some people suggest in getting the "to go" container right away and putting half the meal in it for later. That makes really great sense and I've heard it before...but never tried it, maybe I should.

BeeElMarvin

EXACTLY! THANKS!

Thriceshy

Oh, goodness, yes. With us it was, "Eat everything on your plate . . . or no dessert!" That might have been okay IF I were allowed to choose my own portions! But instead, my parents HEAPED food on my plate--four or five times what a kid should eat, and then admonished me to eat it now or I'd have it for breakfast! We were never taught what a proper serving of cereal was--a heaping, hold-the-cereal-down-with-your-hand-to-keep-it-from-overflowing-when-pouring-the-milk serving was what we got, and it was all SO sweet and sugary! Sugar Smacks, Captain Crunch, Coco Pebbles, Golden Grahams, Froot Loops! It wasn't until adulthood that I actually measured out a real serving--it was 1/6 the size of the servings we grew up with! By the time I was 11, my mother was taking me to Dee's and buying me TWO double cheese burgers, TWO fries, a large coke, AND two ice cream sundaes--one strawberry, one hot fudge. Those were the days before super-sizing, so it was probably the equivalent of a double quarter pounder and a super-sized fry. Wow! When I was ten years old, she would bring home the huge, 56 oz bags of Peanut M&Ms, one for her, one for me. She would bring home Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and Butterfingers. Evening activity was watching TV and mindlessly shoveling candy into our mouths. It wasn't always like this--the wild portions and the "everything on your plate" stuff started very early, but her weird, junk food-pushing behaviors didn't start until after she and my father split up when I was ten. My initial weight gain hit when I was seven, and that was inexplicable--I just started gaining with no change in diet or exercise. Docs later thought it might have been the calcification of my pineal gland. But once I was heavier, the food pushing and encouraging of gluttony went into overdrive.

Am I wrong to blame my parents? No, I don't think so. At ten years old, I had no control over what foods came into the house. I had no concept of how to eat well or stay healthy--that was my parents' job. By the time I realized that my intake was responsible for my skyrocketing weight, I was maybe 13 or 14? And I had no clue how to change things--no books or websites to teach me proper portions, nothing to explain to me fats, proteins, carbs, and calories. I had a few ridiculing and sadistic gym teachers ala Carrie, but nobody who actually gave me good, constructive advice. So I starved myself. Repeatedly.

I do have to thank my parents for a few things, though. Because of their example, my son has never been told to clear his plate. He has never been told that dessert (which we rarely have) is dependent upon Hoovering his dinner. I nursed him for over a year, and I have pushed whole grains, veggies, and fruits his entire solid-food life--even when I've been morbidly obese. I know, "do as I say, not as I do," but I was determined to do better for him than my parents did for me.

Kris

Thriceshy

Yep, so true. We are programmed. And for kids it is important to teach them to clean their plates in the sense that they are getting a well balanced meal (i.e. eat those salad greens or broccoli, etc before you can go play). But when we were kids our parents were controlling our portions and our plates weren't typically so big that we overindulge by eating it all ---its more of a lesson of learning to eat the various types of foods, even the vegetables we didn't like. But that "eat it all, starving people....blah blah" that we heard growing up stuck with us so that when we go out to eat whether it be cheap fast food or a $50 steak we feel we must finish it all in order to not waste it or to get what we paid for. Its really dumb thinking. I can choose to clean the plate and let it go to my hips or it can be tossed out. The only difference is the first makes me fat. Getting over the wasteful mentality is the biggest deal. I like what some people suggest in getting the "to go" container right away and putting half the meal in it for later. That makes really great sense and I've heard it before...but never tried it, maybe I should.

Sadly, so many times I've done this as an adult. I've been eating a bowl of macaroni and cheese or a plate of pasta, and I'll think, "I'm full . . . but this isn't enough to save. I can't throw it out, that would be awful. I'll just plow through it." So often, afterwards, I'd be sitting there, belly aching with fullness, trying to remind myself that feeling utterly lousy is the reward for stuffing food into an already full belly.

I've finally got the message, I think. I haven't felt like that in months, and I'm so glad.

Kris

rayneface

I struggle with throwing away leftovers all the time. I have recently started to have more strength to do it...

Better in the garbage than on my hips!!!

grahamckas88

I struggle with the same issue. I have to keep reminding myself that it is better to "waste" the food than to "waist" the food!

Bartleyk11

I have always struggled with this also. It was so ingrained in me to finish what was on my plate, then I had even extrapolated that to the whole table. If my kids didn't finish their meals....I would clean their plates up as well.. Eat until it's ALL gone - was always my motto. It's still very difficult for me to let food go to waste. But I am improving. Taking smaller portions to start with, is my best defense.

Eats_With_A_Fist

[grahamckas88 - "I struggle with the same issue. I have to keep reminding myself that it is better to "waste" the food than to "waist" the food! "]

If only my teachers had told me that homophones could be so useful in fitness....
From now on, I will blame her for my fat.

marji4x

I struggle with the same issue. I have to keep reminding myself that it is better to "waste" the food than to "waist" the food!

Genius ;D

Much better and more succinct than the way I said it

beaner1st

I have dealt with this issue also. Along with working on the guilt and learning to throw things out I use other tricks. For example, I do not go out to eat alone and I either share a plate with someone or give someone part of my dish or put some in a doggy bag. And speaking of a doggy bag I have a dog that helps out here and there. (I know, I know human food probably shouldn't go to a dog Another example, I bring my leftoevers to family and friends. My dad is always happy to see me bring him food for his lunch. Also, I have a very skinny daughter (5'5" 102 pounds) who helps me out.

whouwannab

amen