Veteran Patience

Marla64

I'm disturbed lately, my friends, by a growing trend of veterans here impatient and snarky about "repetitive" questions, suggesting that our newbies should be doing more research on their own to find their own answers before cluttering the boards, et cetera--

This is so totally contrary to the MFP that I found nearly 3 years ago when many of my fellow veterans were also newbies. People then were helpful-- at least to me. I asked questions about exercise calories. I asked questions about forum terms, and everything else. I was nervous to venture out. I was unsure. Through the love and patience of a small core of great friends, I learned a lot. Nobody suggested I should go find my answers because this topic had been hashed and rehashed.

Many of you veterans now purport to want to be helpful and supportive, and yet I'm seeing so many complaints about it I want to knock someone upside the head-- enough!

Either help, or don't-- either post advice or don't-- but if you do, you need to shut up about it afterwards-- consider it a good deed done. If you can't stand having to answer the same questions over and over again....don't. Let someone who really wants to help people-- all people-- do it.

But I cringe every time I see the old coots like me being snarky with and about the new kids on the block. We were new once. People didn't treat us this way-- it's time to cut the crap and just be there for people. Or don't.

But, stop the whining.

AnnaValek

I love your splurge. In addition, people, think about this. You were once new and afraid of what world you were entering. Instead of trying to fumble through pages of internet information, much of it contradictory, you asked for personal accounts from people who knew their way around and you grew comfortable enough to start developing your own answers. Just because you've answered a thousand people's questions, it doesn't mean that the next thousand will know any more than the last.

chevy88grl

I honestly feel that for me.. this journey changes so much that I'm ALWAYS a newbie. Yes, I've lost my weight and achieved my ultimate goal weight. But, now as I move into maintenance and more weights than cardio - I still need help. I've never met my goal weight, set new goals and attempted to reach them.

I've noticed there's been some pretty snarky responses lately and it bothers me. Yes, you may see the same questions day in and day out -- but... think back...

DID YOU ASK THOSE QUESTIONS WHEN YOU WERE NEW?

And did someone answer them?

Right. Exactly.

PJilly

I love you, Marla.

Marla64

I love you, Marla.

Back atcha, Jill--

I hit "TILT" yesterday-- so sick of it.

Stop the condescension and arrogance and just help....or don't.

But shut the heck up.

Marla64

I honestly feel that for me.. this journey changes so much that I'm ALWAYS a newbie. Yes, I've lost my weight and achieved my ultimate goal weight. But, now as I move into maintenance and more weights than cardio - I still need help. I've never met my goal weight, set new goals and attempted to reach them.

I've noticed there's been some pretty snarky responses lately and it bothers me. Yes, you may see the same questions day in and day out -- but... think back...

DID YOU ASK THOSE QUESTIONS WHEN YOU WERE NEW?

And did someone answer them?

Right. Exactly.

bingo.

Marla64

I love your splurge. In addition, people, think about this. You were once new and afraid of what world you were entering. Instead of trying to fumble through pages of internet information, much of it contradictory, you asked for personal accounts from people who knew their way around and you grew comfortable enough to start developing your own answers. Just because you've answered a thousand people's questions, it doesn't mean that the next thousand will know any more than the last.

My point precisely--

zippy111

Marla - you are so patient. I love reading new posts and repsonses ...the good ones...because no matter what, you do learn something everyday....like "those bag of chips probably weren't the best choice!":laugh:

Love you Ms. Marla!!!

Marla64

Marla - you are so patient. I love reading new posts and repsonses ...the good ones...because no matter what, you do learn something everyday....like "those bag of chips probably weren't the best choice!":laugh:

Love you Ms. Marla!!!

You're sweet-- personally, I know nothing. I can't help anybody with anything except my personal experience, which I will share occasionally. I don't have time to go on the boards much. I've seen like everybody else that there are, yes, the same questions posed over and over again-- but, so what? That means new people coming in see the same stuff, have the same questions and are hoping for the same kindness afforded me and my other veterans when we first came here.

The eye-rolling and complaining about it is what has gotten to me-- I know I'm beating a dead horse now and have said the same thing myself now over and over again-- but I just can't get over the arrogance and condescension. Yes, we're going to have TOM threads and exercise calories and questions about why we're not losing anymore, and everything else in between-- every time somebody new experiences the same things we experienced three or more years ago-- and everybody else in between-- we're going to see a new thread asking the same question.

I just don't get why that's so irksome. The search engine here isn't the finest-- and to suppose that these people should be finding their own answers so as not to irritate the "veterans" just totally rubs me the wrong way.

*descends soapbox once again*