has anyone said to you...

chevy88grl

Oh yes. I've heard all of those things from people I work with especially. For some unknown reason, they have been my least supportive group of people (and it's funny because I see them the most!).

I don't really understand WHY they say it, but I can tell you that hearing someone ask you "Are you sick? You've lost so much weight we're concerned you're sick" hurts. Here I am, busting my behind to lose weight and people are calling me anorexic behind my back?

runner328

I get the you are so skinny all the time. Very irritating. I am not skinny! I have hips and boobs! I still want to lose a little more weight. I am I obsessed with it? Maybe but hey it's my life lol.

arwensb

I have that happen to me all the time. I get the "You aren't trying to lose MORE weight are you?" question daily. Even though I still have 8 more pounds until my goal weight, I have stopped telling people that because I get the "You are crazy" look from them. Instead I tell them I am not trying to lose more pounds but am working on lowering my bodyfat percentage another 2-3% (currently I am at 20.5%). That way they understand why I am still on a "strict diet" but I don't have to deal with explaining to them the difference between looking okay with clothes on and getting rid of the jiggles and fat that you see with my clothes off.
I can't wait until I hit maintenance and still get the questions. Then it is going to be an answer of "No. But if I go back to eating whatever I want all the time I will shortly be back where I started. Not everyone who counts calories, pays attention to eating healthy and exercises daily is trying to lose weight. Many are just being, *gasp* healthy!"

gelleebean44

Congrats on all your hard work-you look fabulous! I've been big my whole life & dealt with my insecurities behind a mask most times. Over the last few years I've learned to care less about other people's negative perceptions as they don't walk in my shoes (still a work in progress but my inside voice reassures me to not lose my self-worth on this journey). Most people would never be so rude as to say "Don't eat that, I'm worried you're going to get morbidly obese" , but they never think that working out in a healthy/structured way deserves the same consideration. You've worked your butt off to become healthy & happy and that's all that should matter-to you and anyone who cares about you.

I haven't lost as much weight as you have but I think if people have become "used to" seeing you as one size for a long time, then being a HEALTHY size just looks so different to them. (IMO) Depending on how big a person was before, if they work hard and ultimately end up at a healthy BMI it may be perceived as "unhealthy" - even if it's a standard/healthy weight for someone of their height and lifestyle. Sounds crazy, but I guess that's THEIR issue, not yours, right?

Continue to be proud of yourself b/c you've earned it! Don't listen to the "white noise" of negativity and remember: People only rain on your parade because they're jealous of your sun and sick of their shade. (sorry for the rant!)

bprague

I'm having trouble with my family as well. They don't approve of counting calories and exercising everyday particularly since I've always been well within acceptable weight range. For them, counting calories is major diet territory, but I'm trying to eat healthier and become aware of my habits BECAUSE I've always been blessed with a good metabolism. I've never had to worry about eating well, but I will eventually- I'm looking ahead and I'm trying to feel physically better, more powerful, and capable.

As to the particular issue you and many people seem to be having- I would definitely evaluate if your BMI and body fat percentages are within normal range before ignoring them, but it seems like most people are just uncomfortable with such dedication to your weight. It probably isn't jealousy related or even that they think a certain goal is too small, but worry that you are becoming obsessed with your goals, which is just as unhealthy as extreme obesity. Just this morning my sister said "You've been counting calories a lot lately. I don't know how I feel about this". She's worried that I'm going to become anorexic or something (my other sister did), and it just proves that family and friends do care.

tpycha126

My mom actually told me that if I lost anymore weight that I would look disgusting! Really!? Why didn't she think that I looked disgusting when I was 30 lbs overweight, ate fast food everyday, and smoked a pack a cigarettes a day. To me that was disgusting. Now I workout 6 days a week, actually eat fruits & veggies and make healthy meals, quit smoking and just in overall a lot healthier than I used to be, so how is that consider disgusting. I just ignore it and do what I feel is best for me.

mrogers52

Enjoyed reading this thread today! I have been asked why I like to exercise, especially kickboxing, and I reply that I am too tired to be annoyed with inane questions about exercise

lauram1153

ok just have to say i can't wait till people say that to me.. but honestly i think it depends whose saying some people might be genuinly worried but more than likely they don't understand that your loosing weight healthiy.. invite these people around for a healthy dinner and show then that diet food is not the same as a nice healthy diet x

mandeiko

YES!! To be quite honest... it is because we are SO fabulous now, and they are jealous. Forget them! Damnit, be proud!! No one should rain on our hot tamale train!!!

mandeiko

YES!! To be quite honest... it is because we are SO fabulous now, and they are jealous. Forget them! Damnit, be proud!! No one should rain on our hot tamale train!!!

kmturtle3

Just yesteday my MIL looked at me and said "you look scrawny." I tried to deflect it from me and point out that my husband has also lost weight, and she said "well, he looks GOOD. YOU look scrawny." PLEASE. I'm still wearing a size 12 pants for pete's sake. I seriously think that people just have unbelievably skewed opinions on weight and what is actually considered fit and healthy.

It still doesn't make it any less aggravating whenever someone tries to make you feel crappy over such an incredible accomplishment. We are all doing amazing and healthy things for our bodies. All the lazy folk out there just don't get it.

amyb74

I have heard it too. I wanna tell them "just because I weigh less than you doesn't mean I'm too thin, your just too fat". That may be rude though so I just shut my mouth and take it as a compliment.

SiltyPigeon

A customer actually said (referring to me) "Anyone that skinny after having two kids should be shot." She obviously didn't mean for me to hear, but I thanked her for the compliment any ways.

It's funny how many people will comment about me being "too skinny" even though I am in the "healthy" weight range. Yet no one ever said anything to me about being too fat when I was two pounds away from being "obese". Weird.

tsmith6569

I hear it alot too and am convinced it's mostly jealousy and negativity. I am still over 20 pounds heavier than the low end of the BMI and even if I was too skinny, who has a right to say that to me? No one. Well, MAYBE someone who honestly loves me and cares about me, but this is certainly not that. Haters be hating. I have also noticed you are more popular and well liked the heavier you are (or I was anyway) and again, I think it's negative hatred stemming from jealousy.

Kagard11

Never, but I hope someone will by winter!

BGabbart

I am working so hard toward someone saying, hey are you losing weight. :laugh: Just keep doing what you do and love yourself

katie_kaboom

I haven't had the pleasure of being told I am too skinny yet as I have just started on my weight loss journey, but I think some of it stems from the fact that certain types of people know how to be supportive of someone who is far from their goals. They don't know how to be supportive of someone who is almost there. Some of this may be jealousy, or just plain cluelessness.

Anyway, enjoy your success!

knittnponder

I think we have a fairly distorted view of what a healthy weight is supposed to look like in this country. If you are at a healthy weight for your height/frame and the amount of muscle on you then don't worry about their opinions. If they keep bugging you there is nothing that says you have to tell them you want to lose more either. Your weight/your business. If you're worried they're right I suggest checking with your doctor.

jmruef

My mom told me that i was too skinny - 22 pounds heavier ago. Huhwhat? :noway: On the other hand, I completely get where she's coming from. Once upon a time I weighed 45 pounds less than I do NOW. Um, ew. Skeleton city, thankyouverymuch. I know she's scared of looking at me and seeing that again, and because I'm her child she's always going to have some of that fear and concern, no matter how healthy I am now. (And I truly believe I've got it right this time.)

So - I'll do what I need to do to get healthy, MAINTAIN when I get there, and enjoy the benefits.

DestinyDarbi

I totally think it's jealousy. People say that about my sister ALL the time. She is in healthy range... but WAY skinnier than she used to be. I think it makes some people feel better about themselves to make you feel like you're the one with the "issue" and not them.