Negativity

Lauren38570

It can get so frustrating when people start negativity instead of being supportive , I been under my calorie goal for days now and seems thats not good enough for people.I been trying to eat healthier but not to the pound were im driving myself insane.Plus I think it's crazy for those that are super skinny.I"d never diet to the point for that to happen , rather have curves then be all that thin.Seems people drive it into the ground with all of this diet stuff , it can get very frustrating so any words of support do you all think my diary is that bad?Thanks

MinnieInMaine

Everyone approaches these things differently so you just have to take any input with a grain of salt. Some believe you need to eat as clean as possible and on the other side of the spectrum, there are people like me that are pretty happy and have good results from just making sure I stay within my calorie goals most of the time whether I'm eating healthy or not.

I took a look at the last week of your food diary and just looking at calories, I think you do pretty well. You've got a couple days where you're under 1200 net but you come pretty close and have other days where your totals are quite a bit higher so I don't think it's all that bad.

Above all, as long as it's working for you and you're not starving yourself - who cares what anyone thinks? They can go pound sand...

Lauren38570

Thanks so long as your under your goal it's ok to have like a philly from subway or something like that right?Today I am able to eat that and then a good snack tonight , everything was good was just 10 grams of fat over but i'll just try to pick something healthier tommorrow

purpleprose

People should keep their traps shut unless you specifically ask for input. I've never had any of my MFP friends volunteer their thoughts about my diary without me requesting said input.

That said, getting healthier is not just about calories - it's about nutrients and what you put into your body. I'm not a completely "clean" eater, but I did check out your diary and there's a lot of "junk" in there. You indicated in your post that it's not all about losing weight for you, but getting healthier - maybe try limiting the eating out (Subway, McDonalds, etc) to one or two days a week instead of every day. Add some fruits and veggies. And find something other than SlimFast to use as a meal.

Those are my two cents since you asked.

anulle2009

I personally to succeed at weight loss you have to let yourself enjoy things. You cant go all strict and cut out everything your use to eating, but eat it in moderation and not as often.

mandapanda001

The only thing that matters is your journey on here...surround yourself with positive people and let the negative ones go...I get frustrated when people get mad at others opinions...we all are allowed opinions and don't judge someone for how they feel or what they do. Anyway...if you would like a supportive friend (who has bad days but doesn't take out on MFP friends) just add me!! I opened my diary to get feedback but I still eat bad sometimes and come under my calorie goal. It is a way for me to not feel like I am starving myself to lose weight! Good luck on here :-) :happy:

atomdraco

You are not gonna like my answers.

First of all, I'm sure those people probably does not have the intention to be negative, but it's their way to try to help making your journey more successful and lifestyle changing.

Yes, everyone like to have others to say the best things, cheer for whatever they are doing. Truth might be ugly but it's the truth. A king cannot be a good king if all his people praise him all the time, and no one will step up for the truth.

Eating healthy is a process, could be longer for some people. But try to ask yourself whether you like this be a short term thing, or you want to be a lifestyle changing to be healthier and happier. I glanced your diary and can imaging what kind of comments others would point out, and I'm not going to do that here.

My point is, don't get offended by comments about your diary, and may be intention for bring you to awareness to your possible not the greatest eating habit. If you really don't like to hear those, just simply delete the person/people, just keep those always agree with you no matter what (do they actually looked at your diary?).

Good luck to your journey, be happy no matter what.

AlsDonkBoxSquat

First, I'm not sure where this is coming from but if someone asks for advice they need to be prepared for answers. When someone asks “what am I doing wrong” I go into their diary and note what I’m seeing over a period of a couple of weeks and tell them what I see about their diet, and I ask questions about how they’re coming up with their calorie burn and what not. What I’m looking for is how close to the farm their food sources happen to be because your body doesn’t use processed foods as efficiently as whole foods. I’m not one to splenda coat it, I’m going to be straight forward because I’m assuming that they asked an honest question so I’m going to give them the respect of an honest answer. It’s really not my fault if they don’t like what I have to say, they can process the information however they want and do what they want with it including ignore.
If it’s unsolicited advice, well it is none of their damn business to comment on what someone has going on in their diary if they didn’t ask.
I looked in your diary and will not comment directly about it, instead I’ll say this:
If you’re heading in the right direction in your weight goals that’s fine and I won’t pick apart your diet, if you plateau that’s where I would start.
Also, you need to find a more upbeat way to vent about negativity, because you’re talking about it and then you’re making the decision to pass judgment on people you think are “too thin.” Unless you’re talking in medical terms this is subjective and I think passing judgment on someone who is slim is no different from passing judgment on someone who is heavy.

k8edge

I took a look at your diary... Looked about 10 days back.

If you want input... Here is my 2 cents - You basically have no fresh fruits and vegetables in your diet... A 90 calorie side salad which is probably made up of iceberg is not going to cut it. You eat a lot of "crap" lots of pop, red bull, processed foods, fast food, etc... I am not saying that everyone can eat clean all the time and I think that can be somewhat unrealistic for someone that is on the move all of the time. But have you ever heard the phrase... You are what you eat? I truly believe that there is something to that. Just because you stay under your calorie amounts does not mean that you can just eat a bunch of junk food. It is empty calories. Filling your body with healthy sustainable calories is what is important... Here is a quote from a very interesting New York Times article that I read recently... It involves a Harvard research study of the factors that influence weight gain.

“This study shows that conventional wisdom — to eat everything in moderation, eat fewer calories and avoid fatty foods — isn’t the best approach,” Dr. Dariush Mozaffarian, a cardiologist and epidemiologist at the Harvard School of Public Health and lead author of the study, said in an interview. “What you eat makes quite a difference. Just counting calories won’t matter much unless you look at the kinds of calories you’re eating.”

Here is the link... I think it is a worth while read. http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/19/health/19brody.html?_r=1&scp=8&sq=you are what you eat&st=cse

So basically people that say its okay to eat junk every day... as long as you stay under your calories. Really? Does that make sense. Sure you may loose weight but what are you feeding your body? Convenience foods is what got our country into this "obesity epidemic" in the first place. And yes, it is an epidemic.

You can eat whatever you want... But when asked for advice, that is what I think on the subject.

Lauren38570

No I wouldn't wanna be to thin cause of health reasons , back when I was a teenager I weighed 105 pounds and everyone thought I was very sick so I just don't want it to come to that again , not passing judgement at all just speaking from personal experience and thanks so much everyone for being nice , I do appreciate that

Lauren38570

Thanks k8 that was really helpful and atleast you weren't very negative and sarcastic about it like some on here.I am going to start treating myself to things like kiwi , plums , strawberry's things like that , I'm sure some fruit and veggies would make a difference.

Schwiggity

I'm not sure what exactly the problem is. Are you upset because nobody's saying "yay good job" when you complete your diary for the day or are people recommending you eat different when you complete your dairy for the day?

Lauren38570

nope just negative people and I don't expect anyone to say good job

k8edge

Thanks k8 that was really helpful and at least you weren't very negative and sarcastic about it like some on here.I am going to start treating myself to things like kiwi , plums , strawberry's things like that , I'm sure some fruit and veggies would make a difference.

Great idea!!!

What I try to live by... I eat anything that can be picked! Veggies and fruits are your friends. So are lean meats and whole grains... Anything processed, that you can order at a counter, drive through, or chain restaurant... Is bad! Not saying that we will stay away from these things all the time (we are human...) but trying to eliminate that stuff is key. Since I have started watching what I eat... I cook for myself. That way, I know everything that is going into my food and I can be held accountable. I pack my lunches... cook dinner... and fix my own breakfasts. Do I still go out to eat? Yes. But when I do it isn't out of convenience it is something special, so it means more. Once you start incorporating fresh foods into your diet you will start to crave them... I personally crave asparagus and grilled chicken. I eat it so much that my husband is sick of it. Haha... Once you incorporate these things you will feel a difference. You will be less bloated. And you will generally feel better.

GOOD LUCK!

AlsDonkBoxSquat

[Great idea!!!

What I try to live by... I eat anything that can be picked! Veggies and fruits are your friends. So are lean meats and whole grains... Anything processed, that you can order at a counter, drive through, or chain restaurant... Is bad! Not saying that we will stay away from these things all the time (we are human...) but trying to eliminate that stuff is key. Since I have started watching what I eat... I cook for myself. That way, I know everything that is going into my food and I can be held accountable. I pack my lunches... cook dinner... and fix my own breakfasts. Do I still go out to eat? Yes. But when I do it isn't out of convenience it is something special, so it means more. Once you start incorporating fresh foods into your diet you will start to crave them... I personally crave asparagus and grilled chicken. I eat it so much that my husband is sick of it. Haha... Once you incorporate these things you will feel a difference. You will be less bloated. And you will generally feel better.

GOOD LUCK!

Not to mention that this is the perfect time of year to eat fresh inexpensively. I know our garden explosioned and we can't give the stuff away I have cucumbers by the fist full, and there seems like I pass farmers market or produce stand every 2 or 3 days.

Lauren38570

oh yeah I love the pizza hut salad bar , I get that quite a bit , has alot of veggies to choose from and ruby tuesday's garden bar is very good!

dpozniak

Hi Lauren,

I'm on a 12 week program called "the point of no return" on a web site "peertrainer". This site hase some great information on how to deal with all kinds of issues - like negativity, or why do I keep messing up- that sort of thing. The 12 week program helps the person dive a little deeper as to why we might do the things we do or make chioces we make. Might be something there that hits home for you.
Best of luck and stay positive!

Lauren38570

Thank you very much i'll be sure to check that out

arkenny

Screw the negative nellys!! this is YOUR joruney! and if you want to eat treats .. then do it! i eat what i want...but with in reason... its all about finding out what works for you.... for me... if i was to go strict...and cut outh anything bad id be more likely binge... im still shedding the weight and getting healthy...but enjoying life and not being wracked with guilt cause i had pizza or booze!

foodfight247

Can I just say - it's not all about weight loss - I'm here as I'm trying to gain the weight. Don't want to be skinny. Just want to be a healthier weight.

foodfight247

I'd just do your own thing and if people don't like it then it's their problem, however, we're all here to support each other in what ever journey we are making.

Try to stay positive and I hope you're ok...

MrsJax11

People should keep their traps shut unless you specifically ask for input. I've never had any of my MFP friends volunteer their thoughts about my diary without me requesting said input.

That said, getting healthier is not just about calories - it's about nutrients and what you put into your body. I'm not a completely "clean" eater, but I did check out your diary and there's a lot of "junk" in there. You indicated in your post that it's not all about losing weight for you, but getting healthier - maybe try limiting the eating out (Subway, McDonalds, etc) to one or two days a week instead of every day. Add some fruits and veggies. And find something other than SlimFast to use as a meal.

Those are my two cents since you asked.

Since you asked, I agree with the above response Looking at your profile, you also list not having to nap as much as a motivator....eating a more well rounded diet will help you feel a lot more energized. If you aren't a fruit and veggie person try to just add one more per meal or something easy like that. You want this to be maintainable for you!
Congratulations on taking the first steps toward a better lifestyle! Many drops eventually overflow the bucket!

Oh...and I eat fast food sometimes, too! And ice cream, and wine, and beer...I just watch the amounts, and make sure to work out if I know I am going to have a wild weekend or something.

Lauren38570

Thanks so much and I always work out monday-friday and I go walking a few nights a week too