uhh...?

BeautyFromPain
BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
edited September 30 in Chit-Chat
i was trying to talk to my best friend about my recent thoughts on suicide but she said that she didnt want to hear it and go call a helpline. Do you think she doesnt care, or am I making too big a deal out of it ???

Replies

  • Atlantique
    Atlantique Posts: 2,484 Member
    It's very hard to guess her motivation, but perhaps she felt overwhelmed and not qualified to help you with such a serious issue and therefore referred you to the professionals? I'm sorry you felt so disappointed, which is completely understandable.

    Did you talk to any professionals about how you are feeling? If not, it would be a good idea.
  • greensnow
    greensnow Posts: 73
    I don't think you're making a big deal at all. I used to have a friend like that- I would go to her in a crisis and she'd push me away. But this friend did a lot of bad things to me and ended up being a 'toxic friend' who I no longer consider a friend. Feel free to message if you want to talk!!
  • skinnylove00
    skinnylove00 Posts: 662 Member
    you probably caught her by surprise, or maybe she feels helpless and she feel like she cant help you but wants to. suicide is a serious thing, if you are considering on taking your own life i URGE you to talk to someone, either a close family member/friend or a counselor. <33
  • Trixtabella
    Trixtabella Posts: 471 Member
    Maybe they didn't want to say something to you that might push you over the edge.

    It must be pretty bad for you to be feeling this way, I am sure your friend didn't feel like they would be able to help you with such a serious matter.
  • rmhand
    rmhand Posts: 1,067 Member
    Its a big deal and your friend did the right thing. Sounds like she felt that she couldn't help you and that if these were serious thoughts then you need to talk to a professional. Perhaps she has had bad experiences with people talking about suicide in the past and it would be hard for her to speak with you, and the best option for you would be to speak with someone else.
  • aa1440
    aa1440 Posts: 956 Member
    Maybe she is scared that she will give you a wrong answer or bad information. That is a lot to put on someone if you are thinking about suicide. How would your friend fill if they gave you bad info and then tomorrow you are not hear?

    Please, if you are contemplating suicide, get some help.
  • IrraCore
    IrraCore Posts: 5
    Some folks are just not able to deal with major issues such as suicide - not many folks are, as a matter of fact. However, if a good friend came to me to talk about her feelings of suicide, I would definately do my best to talk to her/him about it and make sure counseling is set up. Please do talk to a close family member and/or a professional right away if are feeling as though you are stcuk in a hard spot with no other alternative. There always is, but sometimes you just need a fresh pair of eyes to look at your situation and help you with options...life is very much worth living.
  • CorrieV1976
    CorrieV1976 Posts: 320 Member
    It's very hard to guess her motivation, but perhaps she felt overwhelmed and not qualified to help you with such a serious issue and therefore referred you to the professionals? I'm sorry you felt so disappointed, which is completely understandable.

    Did you talk to any professionals about how you are feeling? If not, it would be a good idea.

    I agree completely, some people dont know how to deal with it . She is probably overwhelmed and doesnt know what to say. Getting professional help with this is the best way to go. My ex husband attempted 3 times, it's not easy to deal with and pretty scary for the people around you. No matter how bad things get it is never ever enough to take it to this point, if you ever just need someone to talk to, I'm here! I'm not a professional in any way but I'm here if you just need to talk.
  • bakebunny
    bakebunny Posts: 253
    Even if you were just talking in general terms about suicide, like discussing Dr. Kavorkian's assisted suicides, some people get uncomfortable talking about death, and some religions are very adamant about the consequenseces of taking a life. She's obviously uncomfortable with the subject, so take the topic and your conversation to where it is appropriate.
  • BeautyFromPain
    BeautyFromPain Posts: 4,952 Member
    "She's obviously uncomfortable with the subject, so take the topic and your conversation to where it is appropriate."

    Can you please NOT be rude? I was a told by a PROFESSIONAL to talk to a friend about it, so I talked to my best friend who responded differently then I thought she would have. Hello she is my BEST friend I see her on average 5 or 6 days a week we are practically sisters so you think if I see her that often it may come up? Go take your rudeness to where it is appropriate.
  • SommerJo
    SommerJo Posts: 258 Member
    I don't think you're making a big deal about it -- but I think your friend could have been a little more compassionate when you tried to talk to her. Friends are supposed to listen to each other -- good or bad.

    If your recent thoughts on suicide came about as a possible solution to a problem in your life -- I really would encourage you to think of other solutions -- seek help from other supportive people -- even professionals -- on ways to solve your problem without ending your life. While I believe we should have the right to end things on our own -- I really only find it a viable option in the most extreme circumstances. I'm guessing since you're writing about it on MFP -- it may not be to that level yet and you might be able to find an alternative solution.

    If your recent thoughts on suicide were just that -- what your opinions are -- I think you need more intelligent friends who can carry on a conversation with you about sensitive mature topics.

    Best of luck to you -- if you need someone to "listen" -- my inbox works pretty good :)
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