OT-Romance

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j_g4ever
j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
in Chit-Chat
Alright, I love my husband to death and he is the best thing that has happened to me. He does everything right well except one thing that is. Romance. When we were dating he was romantic he doesn't ever remember this but he was. Now its like pulling teeth. We have been married for 6yrs. I am just wondering if other women have this problem. I told him that if he's romantic he might get lucky. :tongue: but still nothing. He says he forgets all the time. However, on the other hand he says he always thinks about me. I told him if he always thinks about me then why not remember to be romantic here and there. He never knows. He feels as if he is failing me that he is not good enough. He is a wonderful man. Great husband and father to our two kids. Just thought I would ask. Happy friday everyone. :flowerforyou:
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  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    Alright, I love my husband to death and he is the best thing that has happened to me. He does everything right well except one thing that is. Romance. When we were dating he was romantic he doesn't ever remember this but he was. Now its like pulling teeth. We have been married for 6yrs. I am just wondering if other women have this problem. I told him that if he's romantic he might get lucky. :tongue: but still nothing. He says he forgets all the time. However, on the other hand he says he always thinks about me. I told him if he always thinks about me then why not remember to be romantic here and there. He never knows. He feels as if he is failing me that he is not good enough. He is a wonderful man. Great husband and father to our two kids. Just thought I would ask. Happy friday everyone. :flowerforyou:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    :laugh: :bigsmile: :sad: :laugh: :bigsmile: :sad: :laugh: :bigsmile: :sad: :laugh: :bigsmile: :sad:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Now that I've been married for awhile, I find the small thoughtful things romantic. When he takes my car & washes it, or checks the oil for me.

    When he helps our daughter with her homework or just picks up dinner so I don't have to cook.

    I'll take those over candy & flowers any day. :wink:
  • Janie0001
    Janie0001 Posts: 54 Member
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    I have been married for 23 years (i think). Anyhow I found me thinking that my husband was not being romantic. Then I dug deep into my own feelings and what I was doing. Turns out I also was slacking in the romance department. So I started leaving cute cards in his car so he would find them when he went to work, or in his brief case. Couple of times I went to his work and put a card or note or an invitation to dinner in his car. He loved it and he started back being romantic as well.
  • lessertess
    lessertess Posts: 855 Member
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    Why don't you romance him a little bit? Maybe it will inspire him.
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    I have told him it is the little things. Like a little note in the morning or an e-mail from work.


    WillPillageYourVillageForFood i love that message. :laugh:
  • Mireille
    Mireille Posts: 5,134 Member
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    You don't want to know how my DH romances me. :grumble:

    I agree with Shannon, do the dishes and then we can talk...:wink:
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    I have been married for 23 years (i think). Anyhow I found me thinking that my husband was not being romantic. Then I dug deep into my own feelings and what I was doing. Turns out I also was slacking in the romance department. So I started leaving cute cards in his car so he would find them when he went to work, or in his brief case. Couple of times I went to his work and put a card or note or an invitation to dinner in his car. He loved it and he started back being romantic as well.

    I have tried this too. :yawn:
  • GTOgirl1969
    GTOgirl1969 Posts: 2,527 Member
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    Sorry I can't be of much help...my husband's idea of romance is NOT pulling the covers over my head when he farts in bed....:sick:
  • WillPillageYourVillageForFood
    WillPillageYourVillageForFood Posts: 777 Member
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    Now on the serious side......I'm with Shannon, the little things mean so much more than flowers or candy, hell I can buy them myself. I have been married for almost 24 years and I firmly believe that sometimes the romance does fizzle but when I think about the fact that he has been there by my side for all those years that is all that I need to know that he still loves me. He also holds my hand in public, which is something he wouldn't do when we were dating. :laugh: I just want to be like some of the little old couples you see at the grocery store still holding hands and shopping together.
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Sorry I can't be of much help...my husband's idea of romance is NOT pulling the covers over my head when he farts in bed....:sick:

    :laugh: :laugh:

    :flowerforyou:
  • titans6us
    titans6us Posts: 50
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    Hey! Easy, Now....there are guys on this sight. :wink:
  • Phoenix_Rising
    Phoenix_Rising Posts: 11,417 Member
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    I find that breaking routine has helped us in the romance department. Dropping of the kiddle, going out to play Putt-Putt or to a movie (we may see one a year). Something unique, out of the ordinary. Breaking that daily routine gave me the spark of romance that I needed... and in return I was willing to show my appreciation (trying to keep this pg13, so you'll have to catch that drift yourself!!), which helped remind him why he needed to romance me a little!

    I love romantic notes, flowers, chocolates, dinner dates, movies, small gifts, hugs, holding my hand, phone calls, any or all of the aforementioned...... I'm lucky if I get a kiss a day. Or a smile even. Ho-hum life seems to rule. Breaking our routine is the only way to snap out of the doldrums, for us at least.

    Hope things improve! :heart:
  • mellymlk
    mellymlk Posts: 187
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    Don't let it get to you. Most husbands are that way. ON The other hand my husband and I have a AWESOME Sex life:tongue: That's all the romance I need:laugh:
  • mellymlk
    mellymlk Posts: 187
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    Sorry I can't be of much help...my husband's idea of romance is NOT pulling the covers over my head when he farts in bed....:sick:

    ROTFLMAO:laugh:
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    I'm not even married yet and there's no romance! no but seriously, I think romance changes with a relationship. I have heard mothers say that they find it romantic when hubby offers to get up when the baby cries. And some wives find it romantic when he offers to take the garbage out. My guy says things once in awhile, in a totally offhand way... and they hit me so hard as being adorably sweet. He doesn't know how awesome he is! Could it be that you're thinking of romance a little too strictly?
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    ROTFLMAO

    I do have to say that my husbands and I have a wonderful time in the bed. :wink: He wonders sometimes however why I don't get in the mood. Im like well if you do the little things then I will have more time to get in the mood. :bigsmile: I look at him the right way and he is in bed. :tongue: Ah men. :indifferent:
  • j_g4ever
    j_g4ever Posts: 1,925 Member
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    I'm not even married yet and there's no romance! no but seriously, I think romance changes with a relationship. I have heard mothers say that they find it romantic when hubby offers to get up when the baby cries. And some wives find it romantic when he offers to take the garbage out. My guy says things once in awhile, in a totally offhand way... and they hit me so hard as being adorably sweet. He doesn't know how awesome he is! Could it be that you're thinking of romance a little too strictly?


    My husband is a busy man and Im sure sometimes I make a bigger deal out of it then needs to be. But on the other hand I would like him to hire the babysitter so we can go out to eat or something like that. I have given him ideas. Then I sit back and think maybe I need to just relax. Sometimes I have a hard time doing that. :ohwell:
  • SoupNazi
    SoupNazi Posts: 4,229 Member
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    There's supposed to be romance?

    Does him NOT pulling the covers over my head at night when he farts under them constitute as romantic?

    If not, then I am of no help then.

    Here's to 14 years together with my soulmate baby!:drinker:

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