Child Abuse/Child Neglect?

voluptas63

I am VERY sensitive about this subject as I have a younger half sister (9yrs old) who is just massive for her age. She's fairly tall, but she's nearly about as big around as she is tall. Her Mother gives her poor food and most of the time just fast food. She ate very healthy when her mother and my father were married, but now that they've divorced, they've really let her eating get out of control. I am CONSTANTLY scolding my father for giving her his portion of his dinner: "If you can't finish it, why should she??" and her mother, if I could make her disappear, I would. She's just a horrible human being. She calls her fat and lazy... which all she does is encourage it by purchasing my sister NIntendo DS games and other hand held activities to keep her occupied.

I came over to visit my sister and Dad and she was in the house, sitting on the couch playing her DS. I told her to come outside and play and she informed me that her back hurt and her feet hurt. It literally makes me want to scream. I know my Dad needs education on proper eating (He was not my main caregiver, that was my mother) but it's so frustrating and saddening to see my sister like this. She's slower than all the other kids, bigger than them as well. She has NO friends to have sleepovers with and I'm afraid of what will happen to her once she figures out that she's "different" for her size:(

christine24t

I am VERY sensitive about this subject as I have a younger half sister (9yrs old) who is just massive for her age. She's fairly tall, but she's nearly about as big around as she is tall. Her Mother gives her poor food and most of the time just fast food. She ate very healthy when her mother and my father were married, but now that they've divorced, they've really let her eating get out of control. I am CONSTANTLY scolding my father for giving her his portion of his dinner: "If you can't finish it, why should she??" and her mother, if I could make her disappear, I would. She's just a horrible human being. She calls her fat and lazy... which all she does is encourage it by purchasing my sister NIntendo DS games and other hand held activities to keep her occupied.

I came over to visit my sister and Dad and she was in the house, sitting on the couch playing her DS. I told her to come outside and play and she informed me that her back hurt and her feet hurt. It literally makes me want to scream. I know my Dad needs education on proper eating (He was not my main caregiver, that was my mother) but it's so frustrating and saddening to see my sister like this. She's slower than all the other kids, bigger than them as well. She has NO friends to have sleepovers with and I'm afraid of what will happen to her once she figures out that she's "different" for her size:(

I am glad you are trying your hardest! I'd wish someone had intervened when I was a child.

kdchick99

At least you are trying to do the right thing! Your good habits will rub off on your daughter and she's still young. The sad issue is children now are growing up with eating issues from being overweight to children being extremely underweight. Teaching her now the right way will save her many years later. Good job!

kdchick99

I agree with the classes and therapy 100%!!!!!!!!!!! BUT talking about all side of this issue. What do we do when the parents still don't comply with the classes or therapy? Do we continue to let them harm the child?

3LittleMonkeys

It could also be time management - they don't have time to cook dinner, so takeout five times a week is okay for them.

I think this is cop-out. It is neither quicker or less expensive to drive thru for dinner than it is to purchase and prepare dinner. I think starting with raw food and preparing it is best, but when time prevents there are hundreds if not thousands of healthy options that cost less than even the dollar menu, because let's face it, your children didn't get fat eating one jr. burger for a dollar. Pre-bagged mixed salads, steam in the microwave veggies or fish, canned low sodium vegetables and meats, low-fat yogurt or yogurt drinks, minute rice, whole grain coucous (dump in a bag of frozen mixed veggies and you have a tasty side dish in < 10 min.) You can make healthy omelets in less time than you can load the kids in the car. There are many quick and low cost healthy options.

Agreed. There are plenty of ways to have healthy foods/meals available.

3LittleMonkeys

I posted a rant earlier about someone I know that is a large woman who has very large children who I feel is guilty of child abuse/neglect because she will feed her kids larger portions than most adults can eat then call them Fat *kitten* and Pigs! Now instead of putting down the fork herself and looking at what example she is setting for them she finds it easier to belittle them! These are very young kids too!

This is verbal abuse. :frown:

3LittleMonkeys

I feel I have to respond.I have an overwt daughter who is 14.We were working with a dietician for 4 years.We are also working with her family dr.I don`t by junk.I make healthy meals daily.I have struggled with her to exercise.i`ve been on top of this since she got overwt.I have lost 80 lbs myself.
I know there are a lot of parents with overwt children who don`t care what they eat.
But I felt I had to respond about this topic.
jane

But you are trying! Totally different than Parent's that don't care.

bcattoes

I feel I have to respond.I have an overwt daughter who is 14.We were working with a dietician for 4 years.We are also working with her family dr.I don`t by junk.I make healthy meals daily.I have struggled with her to exercise.i`ve been on top of this since she got overwt.I have lost 80 lbs myself.
I know there are a lot of parents with overwt children who don`t care what they eat.
But I felt I had to respond about this topic.
jane

But you are trying! Totally different than Parent's that don't care.

Yes, absolutely. You are not contributing to or ignoring the problem. You have recognized it and are working on it.

KelliH729

I think no...I think it is just getting too involved in someone's personal life. I do agree with others that the parents and children should be offered some kind of education on how to get healthy but I have found that until someone makes the decision to get healthy (whether adult or child), you cannot MAKE them.

That said, I think kids need to get off the couch, away from the video games, TV and computer and get outside. I was very rarely in the house during the day when I was a kid.

bcattoes

I'd be curious to know how you feel about children that are not overweight but are fed a diet rich in fast food and nutrient lacking pre-packaged junk food? I think that is just as neglectful and abusive. Just because a child isn't fat doesn't mean they are healthy or that they are being given the tools to stay healthy into adulthood.

bmw4deb

Ok most will not like my response, I speak from experience
Yes these kids need to have an opportunity to live a normal life.
I have a niece who is beautiful 16 and over 300lbs her mother feeds them pizza,
kfc, mcdonalds everyday 3 times a day (mom is over 300 as well)
This child spent 3 months with me last summer and dropped over 40lbs
I have other family members tell me she is old enough to make her own decisions
it is her fault, IT IS NOT!! when this girl is hungry and there is no other option she
has to eat what is offered or not eat.
These parents need to take care of there children and more and more seem to be there
kids last.