Is it normal to want to eat until your full Everytime you ea

NCmcMan

Hello! I have been on this site now for 5 days. I can't really say that I am eating any different than I was YET, but what I have been doing is writing down whatever I eat. I generally eat 4-5000 calories a day, and I wanted to keep record of that. I never learned to eat "normal" portions, and so I am really having a hard time trying to get that under control. Generally, if I go to subway, I'll order 2 footlong sub sandwiches. Even though I know I don't even need 1 footlong sandwich, and could probably survive just by eating 1, I feel that if I don't get 2, I will be missing out on something, and be miserable. I do this all of the time. For instance, I've gone to chineese buffets and eat about 3 very full plates of food. I know I don't need all of that chineese food, and my stomach is hurting, but it's like I need to keep on eating even against my better judgment. When I go to Mcdonalds some mornings, I will usually order something like 4 breakfast burritos, and 4 sausage mcmuffins. After I eat all of that food, my stomach will be hurting very badly, and then I'll be so upset at myself because I ate all of that. Then, I just do it again soon. When I was a kid, my parents would lock the refrigerator so that I couldn't take food, and I think I have harbored a lot of resentment because of that. It was very embarrassing for me as a kid, and even to this day. I had a small weight problem as a child but I wasn't obese or anything like that. I don't actually think that I have ever told very many people about that type of thing, but it's time for me to let go so that I can get some help. I have about 300 pounds that I need to loose. I weigh approx 500 lbs. I don't even feel like I am really alive. I feel more like i'm simply existing more than anything. I guess what I want to know is since I'm sharing some things with you kind folks, is there maybe some way you can help me to understand why I do these things? I'm hoping maybe there's something I can do so that I can heal and stop what I'm doing. Last night was a little difficult for me because I was sure that I was going to start my diet rite. Then around 2am I went to steak & shake and ordered 2 large milkshakes. I am truly ashamed at who I am and what I've let myself become. I just need to understand so that I can fix. Thanks you for graciously taking time out of your day to read my post.
Josh

melaniecheeks

Josh, welcome to MFP and thank you for your honesty - that's going to be a really important quality and strength for you on your journey.

Well done for admitting there's a problem - that's the crucial first step. I dont have any practical suggestions right now, but I'm sure the great MFP community will have some ideas.

Very best wishes for your success.

TheresaRichardson

Josh, you are on the right track just being here. You have already lost 9 lbs. WAY TO GO!

A lot of us here have a problem with emotional eating.-that's how we got here in the first place! You WILL learn to overcome the obstacles..... being aware and taking it one step at a time will get you to your goal. Good luck and, please, add me as a friend, if you like1

Amybiker

You have made the first step by committing to writing what you eat. This site will help you if you keep it up. Good luck, you CAN do it!!!!

joehempel

I'm going to be quite honest and blunt here, and I hope I don't hurt your feelings, or have it come off rude.

I think the first step is to seek counseling....it's awesome that you understand there is a problem and WANT to fix it! And WANT to understand it...so BRAVO!

But I think it's CRUCIAL that you get your head completely around what you are about to do...there is no going back. A person in your situation, if relapsed, would probably not be able to get back out. So get your head around it, and get yourself ready for a whole new way of doing things and thinking.

It WILL be hard, VERY hard for the first few months, then it'll become second nature, and you will take less time in preparing your meals etc.

But get with a professional first...then I would possibly try to get with a nutritionist. They will help you to understand what you are eating and how it effects your body. Also how to come up with meal plans etc

Good luck on your journey and I wish you the best of luck!!

morganadk2_deleted

Josh, welcome to MFP and thank you for your honesty - that's going to be a really important quality and strength for you on your journey.

Well done for admitting there's a problem - that's the crucial first step. I dont have any practical suggestions right now, but I'm sure the great MFP community will have some ideas.

Very best wishes for your success.

Yes welome

Good luck on your journey

Tracey_Smith

We all have issues around food, hence the reason we are all on here! Take it small steps at a time, rather than go mad and cut down drastically, reduce your order till that feels like it's too much as the food you eat now obviously does. Eating shouldn't bring you pain it should be a good experience. People here will back you up all the way, you just need to make small steps to set you on your way x

NCmcMan

I'm going to be quite honest and blunt here, and I hope I don't hurt your feelings, or have it come off rude.

I think the first step is to seek counseling....it's awesome that you understand there is a problem and WANT to fix it! And WANT to understand it...so BRAVO!

But I think it's CRUCIAL that you get your head completely around what you are about to do...there is no going back. A person in your situation, if relapsed, would probably not be able to get back out. So get your head around it, and get yourself ready for a whole new way of doing things and thinking.

It WILL be hard, VERY hard for the first few months, then it'll become second nature, and you will take less time in preparing your meals etc.

But get with a professional first...then I would possibly try to get with a nutritionist. They will help you to understand what you are eating and how it effects your body. Also how to come up with meal plans etc

Good luck on your journey and I wish you the best of luck!!

I don't think you come off rude at all. I would like to go to a therapist, but They cost a lot of cash, and I dont have any insurance or very much money, so I need to try to find alternatives. You have good advice though. Thanks.

sent4rmabove23

Hi, I'm no expert but I'd say start with small changes. Maybe every week you can set a mini goal like for instance, no soda or 30 mins of walking. How often do you eat? Start eating every three hours... if you go to McDonald's in the morning choose between 4 burritos or 4 sausage mcmuffins but dont eat all 8. 3 hours after breakfast have another little something and when lunch time comes around that you go to subway get1 footlong instead of two. You're right about missing out on something if you dont order two - you're missing out on your life. Right now you "live to eat" but you need to gradually change your way of thinking to "you eat to live." You matter! Take control of your life.. you can lose weight and you will. You do have willpower.

EvyMaria

Your honesty is amazing, truly you will do well with MFP.

Remember if you have a bad day, tomorrow is a new beginning!

tkb1985

I think it's very common for people to feel the way you do, ashamed when you let yourself down, but unable to change the next time around. Psychologically, a lot of people eat because they are miserable, and are then miserable because they eat, and get into an awful catch 22 situation. all i can tell you is that you CAN change the way you think about food. My advice (for what it's worth):

1. Go see your doctor - they'll be able to help you work out a medically sound diet plan to help you on your journey. They'll also be able to help you find out if there is a PHYSICAL reason for your eating habits, or if it's psychological.
2. If they recommend see a therapist / counselor, DO IT. So many people on this site have suffered from depression / anxiety which has been related in so many ways to their weight. There's no shame in asking for help.
3. Make friends on this site! Everyone I've met on here has been so motivational and inspirational to me. They help you when you fall, and encourage you to do your best. Not to mention the great response when you do well. Having people support you in your journey is so important.

Just remember, it will be hard, sometimes it will be painful, but it is SO worth it. You'll get your life and your health back, you CAN do this

Wishing you success! Add me if you like.

kykykenna

You have picked a wonderful site to help you along. As stated, you have already lost 9lbs, good for you!! Support here is AMAZING. We all want to succeed....we want YOU to succeed! It really is a big step by being honest about intake, which is why logging your food is SO important. I have 4lbs I want left to lose.(May not be much, I realize, but it is relevant to the point) I have not done a good job logging in about a month. So...I am at a stand still with my weight. I know this is why. Log EVERYTHING. Some people log BEFORE they eat it, to simply see what it does to their numbers. Maybe this would work for you. Maybe not? Either way you are gonna succeed.....Log your food to be held accountable, drink LOTS of water, and if you eat, start by making simply a "better" choice. You CAN do this! Good luck to you!

Jassper

Start small then raise your goals as you progress. For example, cut that subway sandwich to one foot long and a half, cut your breakfast burritos to 3 instead of 4. Then after you get use to that, drop it to 2 and so on.

The key here is not to set your self up for failure - far too often dieters set their goals way to high and when they don't reach them they feel even more miserable and give up.

I'm glad to see you taking control hang in there and GOOD LUCK!

saydee3

I think it's really fabulous that you've identified what's wrong and want to make it right.

Do you have a state-run hospital near you? We have a state hospital here, and you can go apply for assistance to get any kind of medical care -- including therapy. We also have a non-profit mental health clinic that provides free therapy for those who meet the income requirements. Check around in your area. Therapy is very expensive, yes, but you might be able to find it free or for a low-cost.

Good luck on your journey! I know you'll do fabulous.

Brownski860

Welcome and congrats on taking the first step. Thank you for sharing your story and being honest. I agree with my fellow MFP'ers.
1. This will only work if you are determined to succed.
2. Set mini goals, like mentioned.. only 1 footlong grinder is needed.
3. you WILL feel hungry the first couple of weeks b/c your body isn't used to getting nutrious food.
4. When you are hungry, instead of reachign for something to eat, go for a walk, climb stairs.....
5. Make sure you are drinking 100 ounces of water a day... that will also help curb your cravings.

You will not lose 300lbs over night, in 6 months or in a year.... This is a lifelong journey.... Remember, baby steps..
Just put one foot in front of the other. Do not look a month from now, just focus on your mini goal at the end of the week. Reward yourself for accomplishing that (but NOT with food). Then set a goal for the following week.
You CAN do this!!!

anu_6986

Hey Josh! First of all congratulations on taking this first step towards getting fit, joining MFP. :flowerforyou:

I understand what you mean. I have this scare that if I don't eat right now, I might not have food near by when I get hungry later. Even today at lunch I had some bread and was kinda full, but was thinking about having some rice because I might get hungry later and what if I don have anything to eat then. Then I realized I have some nuts with me and my office pantry is loaded. So I stopped then, and it has been around 4 hours after lunch and I am not that hungry.


So there are a few things you can do. Whenever you order anything, have till you are full. Take the rest of it with you, so you know you can always eat when you are hungry. Maybe you need to tell yourself that you can eat when you are hungry, there will be food around. And also you can drink loads of water.

After this, work towards getting your portions right. Also, you can start of by walking around a little. That will make you feel good.

Friend me if you like. And remember. we all make mistakes. :flowerforyou:

edited to say: read around the topics in the forum, you will find so many ideas.

MB_Positif

Good Morning Josh! First off, thanks for sharing. You are being fully honest and transparent which is one of the best things you can do. When we are honest with ourselves and our friends and family we see things a different way. That said, I am not a therapist, however...I do know of a program that might help you that is FREE!!!! It's called Celebrate Recovery, it is a Christ based 12 step program similar to Alcoholics Anonymous, but is really meant for anyone dealing with any sort of issue. I am on the leadership team for the ministry at my church and we have quite a lot of people there dealing with food issues...including myself even though I didn't realize I had them until spending time at Celebrate Recovery! You do not have to be a Christian to attend the meetings. You can go to www.celebraterecovery.com and find a group near you. There are 13,000+ churches around the world holding meetings so you should be able to find one! This would be a good start for you if you are unable to seek professional couseling/therapy right now.

Second, one of the most awesome books I've read this year was called "Food Rules" by Michael Pollan. It's a super quick read as each page is just one of about 50 rules about eating properly. My personal favorites are not to eat any foods that have ingredients in them that you would not have on your pantry shelf in their singular form (like high fructose corn syrup, etc.) and there was one that I think might help you the most. It said that the phrase that the French say when they are hungry translates to English as "I have hunger," and the translation of the phrase they use when they no longer eat anymore food is "I have no more hunger." That blew me away. A lot of people say we don't need to get "full." We don't, they are right. However, a lot of people say, "Eat until you are satisfied." Well, that's very open ended and I think that we have a skewed image of what "satisfied" looks like anyway because we think of it in many different aspects of our life, being satisfied with our job, our house, etc. SO...when I actually sat down with food to eat, and started eating, I would take a few bites and think, "Am I still hungry?" If I was, I would eat a little bit more. If I wasn't, I stopped eating. You can always wrap up food and eat it later.

One of the best things you can do for yourself right now is stop going to fast food restaurants. Subway is relatively safe, but do whatever you have to do to trick yourself out of the thinking that you need to order two sandwiches. Order two 6" sandwiches until you find that that will be more than enough for you. In your head you'll still be getting your two sandwiches. Please feel free to add me as a friend or message me if you have any questions on what I wrote Have a great day!

Mary Beth

Jassper

I'm going to be quite honest and blunt here, and I hope I don't hurt your feelings, or have it come off rude.

I think the first step is to seek counseling....it's awesome that you understand there is a problem and WANT to fix it! And WANT to understand it...so BRAVO!

But I think it's CRUCIAL that you get your head completely around what you are about to do...there is no going back. A person in your situation, if relapsed, would probably not be able to get back out. So get your head around it, and get yourself ready for a whole new way of doing things and thinking.

It WILL be hard, VERY hard for the first few months, then it'll become second nature, and you will take less time in preparing your meals etc.

But get with a professional first...then I would possibly try to get with a nutritionist. They will help you to understand what you are eating and how it effects your body. Also how to come up with meal plans etc

Good luck on your journey and I wish you the best of luck!!

I don't think you come off rude at all. I would like to go to a therapist, but They cost a lot of cash, and I dont have any insurance or very much money, so I need to try to find alternatives. You have good advice though. Thanks.

All you need is your desire to succeed, there is no magic pill. And your right - IMO it;s a lot of cash that no one has. As for a nutritionist, there is all kinds of information already out there on the net - you can read everything they are going to tell you.

JujiBean

Maybe you need to step back and ask yourself why you feel the need to eat SO much food. Overeating is just one of our coping mechanisms....and there are many.....but something is triggering yours.

Next time you want to eat, could you have the presence of mind to ask yourself, "Am I truly hungry, or am I just wanting to eat for some other reason?"

I wish you so much luck...you are in a place that is difficult to get out of, but not impossible. Asking for help is the first step.

Since you don't have the money for a nutritionist, maybe this could help. Years ago I read a book called, "Thin Within" by Judy Wardell. It changed my thinking on why we eat. May or may not be in print, but worth looking for it. Used book stores or Amazon.com.

More recently, Gwen Shamblin put a book out called the "Weigh Down Diet." It is very religious (which I am not) so it was a little difficult to read, but the overall message is good.

Finally, in England last year, I picked up a self help book at Heathrow Airport...."I Can Make You Thin." Written by a hypnotist called Paul something-or-other. I dismissed it, until I went to a hypnosis show in Vegas last year and it turned out the hypnotist had trained under Paul. He was good....and it worked. Might be worth a look.

hmatchison

Josh,

I understand your pain. I struggled with a smaller version of the same problem. I felt that if I wasn't full it wouldn't be okay and I would get hungry again really soon. Joining was step one and way to go on that one! Admitting there needs to be a change is always the hardest step. What really helped me was having to put in that I had two or three servings of something on here. It just made me feel bad. I knew that I couldn't just jump in the deep end though. It takes time to shrink your stomach and your eyes. I now make sure I never sit food on the table in front of me. If I'm at a restaruant or something, I ask for a box pretty much right away. If I get it out from in front of me, I'm less likely to keep picking at it even after I'm full. I also eat as slow as possible and think about what I'm eating. I avoid distractions like TV or working during my lunch. If I focus on the fact that I'm eating and how much I'm enjoying it, I get more satisfaction from each bite. I also work my days around my favorite foods. If I really want tacos for dinner, I put that in my log first, that way I have the calories already set aside for it and then I build the rest of my day around that. It really helps to have the day pretty much set up for you already. If I know I'm going out for dinner and will have too many calories there, I avoid a midmorning snack. Water seems to help too when I feel I'm getting hungry and shouldn't be. I drink plenty of it to keep my stomach from growling or having pains that I can't bare. It's hard at first to avoid over eating but now that I've gotten used to it, I get full after only a single sandwich! It's amazing! I never thought I could eat a portion and be full! My biggest suggestion, start small! Don't take away your favorite foods and don't go straight from having 4 servings at a time to barely 1. Gradually take it down. Instead of 2 footlongs, have 1.5. Then next time have 1. Slowly bringing it down will make it easier.

Good luck! You will do amazing!

NCmcMan

WOW, thank you all very much for your very supportive and helpful advice. It's a little hard sometimes to talk with people that I know because I drain them and come off as really needy, but I don't get that from you folks. Especially since all of you are here for the reason of health! Thanks again!!

riverweed

I love your honesty, and I'm SO glad you're here. I know I'm merely repeating what others have said, but this is a very positive step, you being on MFP. This place's lifted me out of so many discouraging moments, I've failed and picked myself up again in a community supportive like no other. Just take it a step at a time - 100, 200 calories down from the day before is good progress everyday. I can't wait to hear of how you're doing, you'll be amazing, Josh. xx

ReinventingLisa

I'm the same way but I'm also an emotional eater. I would eat until I'm practically stuffed at every meal even though I might not be as hungry. It's weird sometimes. But when I watch what I eat in terms of trying to lose weight, I think I balance out better. I forgot it what's like to not be stuffed full of food, but not hungry.

Pseudocyber

Couple of suggestions - some of these might be duplicates:

1. Obviously, get professional help - if you can.
2. If you can't afford #1, don't have insurance - look for some kind of local over-eaters anonymous type support group.
3. If you can't find #2, save the 2nd and 3rd serving food costs and join Weight Watchers - it's a paid support group. $40 US a month.
4. Drink water, water, more water. When you're done, drink water. I do it this way - drink a few cups, pee, repeat. The water in your stomach will reduce your physical feelings of having an empty stomach. Additionally, they'll make you feel feel (or stuffed in your case) faster, without adding calories.
5. Vegetables are your friend. You want to eat until you explode to get the feelings of being stuffed? Fine - as long as it's vegetables (not fried). You can literally not eat too many vegetables. Salad - see #6.
6. Salad - vegetables on your salad are fine - other stuff not so much. If it's a veggie, you can use it to make a MONSTER salad. If it's not a VEGGIE - it's OK in moderation. A Tablespoon (or few grams) of egg, bacon, ham, you get the idea. Salad Dressing #7.
7. Salad Dressing - do NOT DROWN your salad in BAD dressing. Salad Dressing is my splurge, as long as it's in moderation. I like Thousand Island - because it's very fattening of course. So, I limit myself to 2 Tbsp (tablespoons) per salad. If you go with something lite, low fat, or no fat (like balsamic vinegar) you can have more. This is where you need to have some control.
8. For your sweet tooth: EAT FRUIT. It has natural sugar, and it's healthy!!! You get vitamins, anti-oxidants, phytonutrients, stuff you can't get anywhere else. Eat lots of different colors orange (obvious), yellow (grapefruit), peach (obvious), red (strawberries) blue (berries), black (berries), red (watermelon).
9. WATER MELON is your go to PIG OUT FOOD. It's bulky, it's sweet, it's mostly water, it's relatively low calorie.
10. THE LESS YOU EAT, THE LESS YOU WANT TO EAT. THE MORE YOU EAT, THE MORE YOU WANT TO EAT.
11. EXERCISE. It's good for you, it takes your mind off eating, it helps lose calories, and if you sweat your @$$ off, trust me - mentally, you'll think twice before you slam down 200 calories in a couple bites - that will take you an HOUR OF SWEAT to work off.
12. Set a calorie goal to stick to - say 1500 calories (this is all day, not a single meal) - you are hungry, you want to eat more - fine ONLY IF YOU EARN IT BY EXERCISING. So, you want another 500 Calories - that means you have to exercise 500 calories. WHY DO YOU THINK BODY BUILDERS CAN EAT WHATEVER THEY WANT, MULTIPLE TIMES PER DAY!?!? Because they exercise their @$$ off.
13. Get a lot of sleep.
14. Avoid your triggers - mine is French Fries - once I start, I don't want to stop. Buffalo wings. Pizza. AVOID YOUR FOODS YOU CANNOT CONTROL.
15. DO NOT EAT AFTER A CERTAIN TIME AT NIGHT - NO MATTER WHAT. You set the time - like 8PM, 9PM. If you are tempted, DRINK A PINT OF WATER FIRST. WAIT 10 MINUTES.
16. DON'T KEEP JUNK FOOD AT HOME. I've done the 10PM chocolate run, a lot of us have. But at least, you have to get dressed, go out and drive to the store.
17. I'm not a psychologist, but I took psychology in college. One of the things we had to do was Behavior Modification. The basics were - get a token - could be a Dollar coin, a poker chip, marble - whatever. If you do something good, a behavior you want to modify, give yourself a token as a reward. If you don't meet the goal, you DO NOT GIVE YOURSELF THE TOKEN. When you have 10, 100, whatever, you take the tokens and "cash them in" for some reward (NOT FOOD). Could be a movie, clothes, whatever - something you like to have or do, but you can wait for. You will EARN the reward, and mentally, feel good about yourself for doing it. I read somewhere it takes 3 weeks to form a habit.
18. I'm out of ideas - I hope these help you!

19. Find someone you can talk to - that won't judge you, but will support you and offer encouragement. We're here virtually - but see if you can find someone in real life.

Hope these help.

20. Good job on the first day of the rest of your life!!! Keep it up! You CAN do it.

21. If you're tempted, and you have a computer, open up MFP and read through the "success stories" section. THEY DID IT! YOU CAN TOO!

tiggersstar

my advice is to start out small, do some walking, eat a bit less, then build it up. oh and dont get too down when you have bad days and need to eat more. slow and steady always wins the race mate!

:flowerforyou:

Lozze

Josh good luck first of all! As everyone else has said you've taken the first step.

I've just spent the past week dropping my soda count (from 4L to 1L) and one thing that has taught me is

1. WATER IS AWESOME. Even after a week of chaning I'm craving water now. Have a bottle of water on you at all times.
2. Don't go cold turkey. It will damn near kill you. Even for me dropping 3L of soda (Pepsi Max) a day was almost too damn hard. I had the shakes and the migranes from the withdrawel symptoms.

Mostly and this is the hardest part (and one I battle constantly) positivity is key. I know at my weight I'm so negative with myself. I hate myself every time I look in the mirror. But if I hate myself I'm not going to make the changes to make me a more awesome version of me. So make small cuts. The 1.5 footlong, 3 burritos instead of 4. Small steps become big steps and big steps make a big difference!

Good luck!

marianne_s

It is normal when it has been a habit to eat that way....
I think a lot of us became overweight for this very reason, not being able to control our portion sizes.

So, maybe this is the 1st thing you need to concentrate on - to reduce your portion sizes. Have only one Subway sub at one time and eat some fruit instead of having a 2nd sub

It's not going to be easy at first.... it wasn't for me....

But after a couple of weeks it will feel easier.....
Now 7 months later, I can not eat as much as I used to in one sitting.

SweetStrawberry

I myself actually was anorexic at one point and then I became a bullimic and then I became a binge eater. I know how you feel right now and to me the therapy didn't help me very much. So i dont think your really missing out there. I feel helpless sometimes that I'll never be able to eat "normal" but there is hope b/c you've idenified the problem and you want to change. I want to change too and I know how it is waking up every day on a diet and then failing at it every night. I dont have much advice b/c i'm in the same boat but I think one thing that has helped me is thinking about the future. If I eat these cookies how is my stomach going to look tomorrow? i also think about the inspirational quotes that I read here on MFP. I wish you luck in this weight loss journey

Blessings,

Elise

Pseudocyber

For portion control - one thing I've heard of is to find those plates, tupperware containers, etc that are divided into sections. Usually it's in 1/2 - with one big one, and the other half in half again - so 2 smaller sections.

Then, if you want to get really crazy ... the big section is for vegetables. The smaller ones are for protein (meat) and carbs (rice, potatos, pasta).

You obviously eat ONE plate - but using this method, even if you ate 2 plates - you'd be eating one plate of veggies, and half protein and half carbs.

No plate space for sugar (cake, cookies, pie, pudding, etc.)

LivLovLrn

I agree that you should get some counseling. No shame in that; you've admitted that you have a hard time stopping yourself, why not find some one who can help you work through those emotions so you CAN stop yourself. You are already ahead of the game by realizing at least some of your motivating factors. One thing I firmly believe in is small steps. You don't have to completely change all at once if that is too hard for you. Some people do really well with complete change, some do not. An option would be to get one foot long and one 6 inch next time you go to Subway; when you realize that really does fill you enough (it's ok if it takes more than one time) then you can work your way to eating just one 12 in....or 2 six inch so you can have a couple different kinds of sandwiches. You get the idea.
I think the same theory works with exercising. You don't have to go out and get a gym membership or buy expensive equipment right off. Start with a walk to the end of the block and back. Or park at the far end of the parking lot, or stand up and sit back down a few times during commercials while watching tv...just find something that works, do a little at at time until it gets easier and then build on that.
You have gotten a great start, you can do this. Always come back to your support system when you are having a hard day...we're here for you

DancinSMartiPants

Right on, PseudoCyber. You saved me a lot of typing!

I just have one thing to add. No one else can want this for you. We can be supportive. Your family and friends can be supportive. None of it matters unless you really want this. It WILL NOT be easy. Want this for yourself and the rest will fall into place.

Good luck and feel free to send me a friend request.