How did you gain your weight?

allaboutme

turned 40 and quit smoking and figured all the joy was gone out of my life now so who cares, I may as well eat. So I did. Well then I realized I cared and needed to do something about it. So since July been on a mission to be as healthy and happy with myself as I can be, and to do this the right way, so the pounds don't come back.

kellch

Ok........a combination of things are a factor to me being overweight. All throughout high school I was stick thin. People used to say I was too skinny. (I always had a belly but nothing like what it got too after the events I'm about to list). I was about 115 lbs until about 1999. I started dating this guy I knew from high school. In the beginning he was very sweet (arent the all :ohwell: ) I eventually moved in with him after about 8 months of dating. He started to become controlling and mentally abusive. Calling me horrible horrible names. (every horrible name you could ever imagine) The first time he did it, I was so hurt! I started packing my stuff while he was passed out, drunk, on the bed. I got tired so I laid down on the floor and feel asleep. He woke up about an hour later and started going off...You stupid B...You fat wh###....and on and on....if you ever leave me you'll regret it...and so will your family. I didn't know what to do. I never saw it coming. I've never had anyone talk to me like this. Usually I wouldn't have put up with it. But the psychotic look in his eyes scared me. The next day, of course, he was soo sooo sorry and sweet. I still walked around for days, hurt, scarred, and in pain. My heart really actually hurt. (literally) It didnt happen again for a few weeks....eventually it started happening every week, then almost every day. In front of people, in front of his own son, and no one understood why I would get so upset all of a sudden. He would say things so that no one else could hear him but I could. He would give me evil, scary looks. If I looked in the direction of a guy (even if it was family or a close friend I have known for years) he would accuse me of horrible things. (have to keep this clean so you'll have to use your imagination...although is dimented thoughts are wayyyyy out there it might be tough to get the whole picture) If I got home from work 10 minutes later than usual, he would accuse me of things beyond imagination. As if I just walk up to anyone on the street and say "hey ya wanna......bleep" He was sick. He secluded me from friends and family. I was embarrassed, ashamed, and scared. I started to believe the horrible things he would say to me. I hid in my bedroom and cried and ate(food was a comfort to me). I remember one time he said some horrible things in front of his son (I basically took over taking care of his son...he was 3 years old and still wearing a diaper, hitting, kicking, cussing....that poor kid). I got him potty trained, stopped the hitting, kicking, and cussing. The first time I watched him, he smacked me and called me a B#$%^. But anyhow he crawled up on the bed with me that morning after his dad left and said " Cheryl, did my daddy make you cry?" I am not one to downtalk a parent to their child so I just said "Well you know how sometimes your sister makes you mad and you might say mean things but you really dont mean them? Because you still love her? Well sometimes me and your daddy get mad at each other and we say things we don't mean too. But it doesn't mean we don't love each other" He started talking about how his sister made him so mad one time when she put his Power Ranger in the toilet...LOL...and said he said mean things to her too. So I think it was the best way to explain. He gave me a big hug and snuggled with me til it was time to get up for work. Such a sweet kid. Part of the reason I stayed was because of him...and I was scared. He threatened to kill me and my family if I left him. Eventually it turned to physical abuse...pushes, slaps, restraining me physically, and so on. I ended up pregnant and he pushed me. I ended up miscarrying. I think it was due to stress, unhappiness, and abuse. I was finally planning my escape. One day he came home and I had been in the shower earlier that day. I heard a knock at the front door. I locked the bathroom door and got back in the shower. I wanted a long hot shower, non-interrupted. It was his cousin. He let himself in and sat in the living room. I got out of the shower got dressed and went to the living room to visit with his cousin for a bit then his cousin left. When jerkwad got home I told him his cousin had stopped by while I was in the shower and told him the story. He says "what did you let him in while you were naked?" I said yeah and then we had a great time. Cuz I was to the point where I was so sick of his stupid crap that I started getting cocky right back at him. He pulled out a shotgun and told me if I was there when he got back it was my own fault if he used that gun on me. He went to a football game that day. I got a Uhaul, packed my stuff, and got the heck outta there. It was my chance, and I wasn't about to pass it up. I hid in a motel for a couple weeks and eventually moved in with my sister until I found my own place.

It was at that point where I decided I needed time to heal and take care of myself. I was up to 204 lbs. Depression and abuse can do that to a person. I was so emotionally scarred. My friends and family knew things weren't right but they had no idea how bad it really was. Or they probably wouldda killed him. I was ashamed and embarrassed. After a week in the motel, I finally asked my sister if I could stay with her for a while. My neice saw me and said "mommy, aunt Cheryl needs to lay off of the doughnuts and sweets, huh" LOL...kids, they're so honest. Also, the first night I went over there I heard Mariah Carey's "Through The Rain". It touched me so much. It got me through. I knew I was strong enough to make it on my own. I could stand up once again, on my own, and I was strong enough to mend. BEAUTIFUL SONG! BEAUTIFUL LYRICS! I eventually got my own place, got a dog (they are wonderful for healing)...her name was Chica (lab/pit mix), she was my angel. Unfortuneately when she was 3 she chased a squirrel across the road and got struck by a car. But that's another story. I started losing weight just by being happy again, getting out of the house, and walking the dog. I cut out soda and got down to 164. I kind of went up and down with my weight.

Eventually after a couple years of being single, I meant my, now, fiance. The love of my life. He's been so good to me. We moved down to FL I got down to 148, then moved to Columbus, gained some weight back, I was up to 157. 4 months later, I got laid off and was offered a job with the same company here in SC. We stayed in a motel for 4 months (waiting for our house to be built) I gained a lot of weight living in a motel. Living off of carryout and fast food. I got back up to 169lbs and then found MFP. I fell on and off of this plan but still managed to get down to 158. In March he proposed and I got very serious about this. I want to look good and feel good on my wedding day, we want to have kids so I need to be healthy, I want to be around for them for a long time, and I want to feel confident and love myself. I'm now down to 138:drinker:

And that's my story....sorry it was so long. But thanks for letting me get that out:flowerforyou:

Oh...and I also like food and just didn't eat healthy. I didn't care about myself....Now I do :drinker:

TexasAngelBeth

I gained weight from steroids given to me after an accident while I was gone from home...
They also would not let me excercise or do anything but walk so I went from working out 3 times a week hard to walking in circles in a gym
The only other time I gained weight before that was when I was on Depo Provera but with in a few months of getting off of it I lost everything...obviously drugs of any kind and me do not mix


My motivation is that I work with YOUNG adults and I need to be in as good of shape as they are and my children deserve a mom who can do everything from run a race with them to learn how to kayak

gmukris

Wow, Kellch, what a story. I'm so glad you're in a better place with someone who loves you and that allows you to love yourself!

kellch

Wow, Kellch, what a story. I'm so glad you're in a better place with someone who loves you and that allows you to love yourself!

Thanks! :flowerforyou: It's not an easy thing to do and it's quite scary. That's why alot of people never leave. But I figured even with his threats, I would have died with or without him. It was the best thing I've ever done and I came out stronger in the end because of all of it. It took time to heal but I have. With the help of my fiance. I mean I still have issues :laugh: ...don't we all....and some of them I think go back to going through what I went through. But for the most part I'm stronger because of it. He also quit drinking after I left and hasn't touched alcohol since (from what I hear) and he's married now. So I think that the whole situation helped him too. Which is great. :drinker: Ya know, alot of people are surprised to hear that I don't hate him and am glad he's ok now. But I don't. I know he had a good heart deep deep deep down inside...burried behind a brick wall...but he was sick. And I'm glad he got help. His son is doing well also. He sees my mom sometimes in the school she works in and he asks about me alot. Things happen for a reason....even if it's only to show you how strong you really are and what you can overcome. This showed me I can overcome almost anything. And it taught me to stick up for myself. I am worthy and I do deserve to be treated with respect :drinker:

yoginimary

Kellch - good for you for leaving.

My weight gain was caused by years of eating like it was a competition and not enjoying my food. In other words, I ate quickly and mindlessly.

My "ah-ha" moment was during yoga when I couldn't do a twist - because part of me was in the way.

kellch

Kellch - good for you for leaving.

My weight gain was caused by years of eating like it was a competition and not enjoying my food. In other words, I ate quickly and mindlessly.

My "ah-ha" moment was during yoga when I couldn't do a twist - because part of me was in the way.

Thanks :drinker:

Now that I'm stronger, better, faster.......let someone mess with me now

Good for you for making that choice! :drinker: :flowerforyou:

kelrob31

I regained my weight when I met my husband and went off the Depo shot. I didn't gain weight while I was on it, but as soon as I went off of it, it started piling on. I've gained 40 lbs in 6 months, and I HATE it. Not to mention the fact that my hubby can cook, which doesn't help. I want to lose it because I hate the way I feel now, and I hate that my clothes don't fit me. It's such a blow to the ego to have to buy bigger clothes.

cnj001

Genetics and college plus a job at a pizza restaurant. BIG mistake. I gained 25 pounds that semester alone.
My boyfriend and I ware waiting to get engaged until I'm done with school and I want to come home from college and look great and be able to fit into any wedding dress and not have to shop at a specialty shop.

cnj001

I actually can't remember ever being thin. I've always been one of the fatter girls throughout school and I just kept gaining weight. My mom's side of the family is obese so genetics is also against me but my eating habits weren't helping. I LOVE food. Because I was fat I never really felt comfortable joining a sport or anything so I just kinda sat around (I was in marching band. It was hard work, physically and mentally, but I never really got anything out of it. I just kept gaining weight.)

My mom got the gastric bypass in April and she has already lost nearly 90lbs. That, along with moving to go away to college in January is my motivation. I want to be thin and healthy in college. I also want to have more confidence than I had in high school.

I know that gastric bypass seems like the perfect solution but just a warning to everyone that it is STILL a DANGEROUS procedure. So if anyone out there is considering it please think about it very carefully and consult a doctor. In 2006 my father died one week after having gastric bypass surgery when his new stomach was unable to pass any of the food he ingested into his intestines.
I don't mean to scare anyone, just reminding everyone that what may seem like the easiest solution isn't always the best.

skwhatley

I can't say that I ever remembered really being anything other than heavy. I was healthy but not in a good way. I was always active, playing softball for 10 years but ate nothing but junk. When I hit puberty I grew and thinned out but was still heavy. I blame all the food I ate. I live in the south so when my mom cooked the good cajun food I would get a plate, then a second, then a third and just kept eating until I was uncomfortable. I've slacked off on eating that much but I would still eat junk and sometimes eat in binges out of boredom. I slimmed down after getting a job where I was always on my feet but then I met my fiance and we all know how that story goes. We've been living together for about a year and a half now and he is the pickiest eater and eats nothing but junk, so then I would cook nothing but junk leading to me eating nothing but junk. I realized I needed to do something right around christmas time when my "fat jeans" were getting kinda tight and I tipped the scale at about 165 lbs. Now I make the extra effort to make me a totally separate meal from him and if I do eat what he does I eat only the serving size and it has made a big difference. Now I just gotta get him to follow cause I'm not the only one who has gained weight since we started dating...:laugh:

cthom

Marrying a couch potatoe and loosing myself to what he wanted. :frown:

Catzwitch

I've spent my whole life up and down but THIS time...

Well, I was single, newly separated, living alone, working two jobs and never kept much fod in my house. Plus I was on all my medications and they help me stay balanced out. Then came the boyfriend... and when he moved himself into my house I had to start keeping food there since he actually ate....

Then came the layoff from my job, and the loss of my insurance which meant the loss of all my medications.....

And the sitting around at home all day, with food in the house since there is someone else there....

Then came my Ma... I work for her a couple of times a week and being typical Italian she feeds us like crazy.....

So yeah, in about 6 months I've packed on a little more than 50lbs....



And now, I'm stuck, because I gave away all my nice "fat" clothes to my former best friend (the one that ran away with my husband... :grumble: .) thinking I'd never gain the weight back, never counting on life flipping upside-down again.


I want to be the rock-star model girlfriend again that I was when my guy & I started dating, I want to fit into my "good-*kitten*" jeans again, I want to actually be able to wear the clothes I have...


Good luck everyone, keep it up.