Forgive me MFP for I have sinned....

MelissaGraham7

I've not posted a blog before but today is the day. Forgive me, family, for I have sinned. I have been playing mind games with myself. I cheated and weighed myself after an 8 mile run and entered that weight. I have felt guilty ever since. So, today I'm going to go put my correct weight in and accept the gain - not really a gain but just erasing the loss.... or why do I have such a hard time accepting it as a gain??? I am far into this journey (almost 2 years) and have had 86 pounds gone since my highest weight. I've got nothing to be ashamed of. We all gain every now and then so what the heck is my problem??? So, I shall be human and vulnerable today and announce that I cheated and am confessing.

While confessing, yesterday I ate 2 Reece's peanut butter cups AND a klondike bar.. Today I feel awful.. Probably payback? :ohwell:

This morning I hit the gym hard to get back into it (also went five DAYS without exercise and the excuses don't matter). So, I did 12 minutes on the elliptical while waiting for the StairMaster. Seven minutes into the StairMaster, I developed a lot of sweating and some nausea to the point I had to stop. I had to sit on the floor while I fought the urge to throw up! Didn't want that happening in front of anyone. Spent about 5 minutes sitting with my tongue clamped to the roof of my mouth (you can't throw up if you do that; my personal trainer taught me that a few years ago). Finally made it to the bathroom where you don't need to know what happened. LOL. Anyway, mopped off the sweat and the nauseated retreated but didn't go completely away. I did manage an hour on the treadmill then at a fairly slow pace of 3.5 MPH and 5-degree incline. Still feel weak, slightly nauseated and like crying. First day I've EVER felt my age.

So, anyway, long story short - I'm gonna get back into my healthy eating and work outs and stop cheating on myself with stupid mind games. I've only got 13 more pounds to go and a lifetime to do it in!! I can do this and I have my MFP family to help! Feel free to friend me if you wanna be part of it!

kwest_4_fitness

Go forth and sin no more. :bigsmile:

meggers123

Don't stress too much. Stand up, brush yourself off, and get back on the wagon.

You're doing amazing so far! Keep it up!

world2c

So you had a bad day.... Pick yourself up and carry on with the fight.... I definitely think you learned from your mistake!! Keep up with the awesome work- from your ticker you've come along way to quit now.

smurfette75

tomorrow's a new day!!

Riley4ever

You've not sinned, you've just had one bad day calorie wise and one bad week exercise wise during a 2 year stint. Forget the past, tomorrow is a new day and the start of your remaining 13lbs loss. Look forwards to reading about your goal weight achievement very soon

mom2BandD

Congrats on all the weight you have lost so far. You had a whoops day and a blech week, so what. I love that you are just picking yourself up and just getting back to the right way of living. WTG!

Those last 13 lbs will come off and we will read about your goal achievement in the next while.

BTW I must say I love how supportive this message board is. Incredible.

sue26

Welcome back on the wagon lol
You have so much to be proud of already.

kennethmgreen

For me the important part of making a mistake is honestly acknowledging it. That's the only way I can truly move on. It's the secretive stuff that destroys me (mind games, excuses, shame, etc.) Thanks for your candor.