Secret?

krazeestraw
krazeestraw Posts: 113 Member
edited October 1 in Health and Weight Loss
Early this afternoon, my boss walked into my cubicle with a box of donuts. She opened it up and offered one, then looked taken aback when I declined. "Are you sure?"... thanks, but no thanks.

Just now, someone else on my floor just came to see if I had had a donut from the box, and if not, did I want them to bring me one? In the words of Cathy: "ACK!" How do I let people know to leave me alone when it comes to food and treats, without telling them my weight-loss intentions? I've just started out and am uncomfortable announcing my diet plans to the office. Also, I don't want anyone to snicker or predict failure behind my back. Is there a possible polite way to do this, or do I just take it as it comes?
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Replies

  • hm_day
    hm_day Posts: 857 Member
    If people offer, just do what you've been doing: politely decline. Eventually, they'll stop asking. And if they don't.. keep politely declining! You don't have to tell everyone you're trying to lose weight.
  • Loko_Ino
    Loko_Ino Posts: 544 Member
    Take it as it comes, if you don't want them all to know your plans.

    Or you could look at the person offering you the doughnut and say something like "so i can end up like you? no thanks" then they will think you are so rude they won't ever offer you treats again =)
  • MegRuthie
    MegRuthie Posts: 139 Member
    LIE


    ..say "oh no thank you I had a HUGE breakfast/lunch/dinner and I'm STUFFED"

    or if you have the willpower to do so..take one and as soon as they're gone, throw it out.
  • glockster972
    glockster972 Posts: 704 Member
    I would politely tell them I'm trying to change my eating habits and donuts and other junk is not something that I want to eat. But in the end, I personally don't care what others think, it's what you think about yourself that matters!
  • springtrio
    springtrio Posts: 429 Member
    Take it as it comes, if you don't want them all to know your plans.

    Or you could look at the person offering you the doughnut and say something like "so i can end up like you? no thanks" then they will think you are so rude they won't ever offer you treats again =)

    Wish I could say something like that...probably explains why I don't have too many friends...I'm too honest.
  • meowthania
    meowthania Posts: 76
    No reason to be rude (eventhough I understand the frustration with people being pushy about wanting to get you to eat bad food).

    Like HM said - just keep politely declining. I've been doing this at my work for the last 3 months. Now, I don't get offered things anymore, and if people "bug" me about it, it's usually to say "She has such good self control. I could never do that"

    Chin up, and keep at'er!
  • agleckle
    agleckle Posts: 235 Member
    If people offer, just do what you've been doing: politely decline. Eventually, they'll stop asking. And if they don't.. keep politely declining! You don't have to tell everyone you're trying to lose weight.

    I agree, keep declining! Declining is a very hard thing to do so the more you do it, the easier it will become to decline in other situations too! Way to go!
  • dragonflydi
    dragonflydi Posts: 665 Member
    When people who do not know or understand the journey I've been down offer stuff like that to me, I simply say "thank you anyway, but I tend not to eat extra refined and over processed foods. They aren't good for me." They need not know why I don't eat them, just that I choose not to :)
  • kaligrl1
    kaligrl1 Posts: 54
    maybe just stating "oh, i wish, but if it doesnt grow from the ground i am not doing it' Or something about you looking for healthier alternatives, you may be surprised who leaves fruit on your desk or home grown veggies.
  • Sj20fame
    Sj20fame Posts: 205 Member
    YEP, politely decline, and I'm sure you'll get looks and they'll probably be with a ? on their face, but you keep going forward and doing what you do! Good job, and don't give in!
  • hypotrochoid
    hypotrochoid Posts: 842 Member
    My coworkers did this to me. I kept saying no, they kept offering.

    After about a month of this, one really pushy coworker insisted that I take a donut. I gave in. I picked it up, smiled, and gingerly dropped it into the wastebasket, all while remaining eye contact.

    No one's offered since.
  • theba2il
    theba2il Posts: 548 Member
    I'm reading Linda Spangle's 100 Days of Weight Loss: The Secret to Being Successful on any Diet. She says to say "Not just yet; I'm going to wait a little while." If they ask again, say "Thanks, I'll still wait a bit." Hope that helps! Good luck!
  • katlady32
    katlady32 Posts: 18
    Bring "treats" to share yourself: veggies and dip, hummus and crackers. The healthy snacks will make your coworkers feel good and think highly of you.
  • wickedcricket
    wickedcricket Posts: 1,246 Member
    say you're fasting for religious reasons and then offer to tell them all about your religion and they'll leave you alone after that
    LOL
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    I'd just be honest. "No thanks, I'm cutting back on the sweets." They don't need to know every detail, but without ANY detail, they have no idea they're being frustrating.
  • bloodlesscoup
    bloodlesscoup Posts: 32 Member
    It takes a while, but getting comfortable with being honest in your weight loss goals has a surprising effect with the people around you. You don't even have to say, "I'm trying to lose weight," but adding that you're cutting down refined sugar the next time you decline will start to plant the seed of "oh, she's health conscious!" rather than them having to think it's even a weight issue at all.

    I've been honest with my coworkers in my immediate office, and my roommate also works with me, but in another department. I finally had to get very direct with the "Don't even try being a bad influence when I'm trying to be good" and, as a result, I went with her to a doughnut shop last night, but didn't buy one, even though I'd been mentally prepared to get one. Just be consistent with setting your boundaries, and people will respect them.
  • jujubean1992
    jujubean1992 Posts: 462 Member
    i know how you feel. a girl at work will make something to eat and bring it in and practically shove it down your throat until you taste it. usually i say no i'm not a big *insert what ever she's waving in my face here* person. or my boss likes to bring in doughnuts for everyone and if i told him i don't want your stinkin' doughnuts i'll get fat, he would be offended. so i'll take a doughnut and split it with someone. something plain, lower calories.
  • Setof2Keys
    Setof2Keys Posts: 681 Member
    LIE


    ..say "oh no thank you I had a HUGE breakfast/lunch/dinner and I'm STUFFED"

    or if you have the willpower to do so..take one and as soon as they're gone, throw it out.


    Agree or tell them your diabetic. They really won't offer after that. LOL. You can totally do this and this is the right place to be. BTW that is a total NSV (Non-Scale Victory) for turning down the crap food.
  • SoCalSwimmerDude
    SoCalSwimmerDude Posts: 507 Member
    Ha, I run into this all the time. One of our assistants loves to bake... and you know how people that love to bake are... they gain pleasure from handing out treats to make others happy. Here's what I say:

    "Aahh!! Lila, you're killin' me! I'm trying to eat healthy!"

    Now, Lila is a wonderful person and is understanding which makes things easier. But she's also the type to constantly remind you that she made brownies for you. Ha, I see nothing wrong with telling people that you're trying to eat healthy.... Not "lose weight" or "diet"... just trying to eat healthy.
  • NiciS72
    NiciS72 Posts: 1,043 Member
    Luckily I can no longer eat wheat (celiac), so I just tell them I'm allergic. However in your case I would politely decline saying that you are trying to eat healthy and cut out processed foods or carbs or something to that affect. Good luck!
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,605 Member
    Like you, I didn't want people to know I was 'trying' to lose weight. Why heap on that extra pressure?

    Just say no. 'No thanks, I'm not in the mood'. 'No thanks, I'm not hungry'. 'No thanks, I fancy a bit of fruit'.

    You don't owe anyone explanations.

    Or if you're comfortable with it, tell them you're trying to make healthier food choices.
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
    Make a sign and hang it in your cubicle. I DO NOT EAT JUNK!!
  • Alidecker
    Alidecker Posts: 1,262 Member
    I had the same issue, people finally stopped, but then again, I wasn't going to tell anyone about my weightloss plans but changed my mind and did end up telling enough people that they stopped asking me. Honestly, telling people ended up helping me a lot. I received a lot of encouragement and others have jumped on the healthy eating bandwagon with me. Occassionaly people will walk around to see who wants ice cream or chinese for lunch....they start to ask me, laugh and turn around because they know I won't order anything. Every once in a while, I do surprise them and say yes though.
  • starracer23
    starracer23 Posts: 1,011 Member
    I agree with the others...just continue to say "thanks, but no thanks"

    I know what you mean though, the difference is my friends know that I am making a change and I won't eat most of the stuff that they do. We meet monthly for breakfast...they all still seem so shocked that I don't eat any more. I have to tell them every time..."No I ate at home" - and then they walk over with their plates piled high with pancakes, waffles, nasty eggs, gross hash browns and everything is dripping in syrup...once they are done they don't look too pleased with what they ate....me on the other hand, I'm ready to get to the pedis and the shopping :D
  • eharring
    eharring Posts: 12 Member
    definitely something to learn from this: i don't ever want to be the "pusher." it's easy to offer people when you bring something, because you want to share, and make sure they know that there are "treats" in the breakroom etc... but sometimes it goes beyond that into something uglier about our psyches and wanting other people to fail/stay fat. we can't control others but we can decide not to be the pusher ourselves!
  • FaithsVegWorkout
    FaithsVegWorkout Posts: 471
    It's funny. My hubby gets water ice every night from a place near our house (he's tall and skinny and fit), and at first he was offering it to me every time. He said, "I know you probably don't want it, but I feel rude not offering." Finally, the other night, he just didn't offer. I didn't give him a hard time about offering though. I know he wants me to be healthy.
  • kimi131
    kimi131 Posts: 1,058 Member
    LIE


    ..say "oh no thank you I had a HUGE breakfast/lunch/dinner and I'm STUFFED"

    or if you have the willpower to do so..take one and as soon as they're gone, throw it out.

    ^^ That's smart. I don't mind telling people, and to a lot of people it is obvious that I eat differently, but I do get tired of repeating myself.
  • otr12
    otr12 Posts: 632 Member
    "No thank you."
  • zeeeb
    zeeeb Posts: 805 Member
    just say, "no thanks, please don't offer it to me, i don't need it". I'm trying to eat a bit healthier and cut down on my junk food and it's hard enough without being offered it at work.

    as opposed to going into detail about your plans and methods.
  • krazeestraw
    krazeestraw Posts: 113 Member
    Thanks to all of you - some great ideas brewin'! I'll have to try a few of these to switch up the monotony, and then hopefully I'll become comfortable enough to slip the truth out there...

    I am brand new to MFP so I am loving the community vibe and am super excited to continue this! I appreciate it!
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