Nobody Understands

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KaceeDawn
KaceeDawn Posts: 15
in Motivation and Support
Ever just feel like nobody understands? I know I have so much going on in my life that literally nobody does understand. But the weight loss thing my friends on here are the only people that get it. All my friends here are tiny and don't see why its a big deal to me to lose weight and be happy with myself. They've never had to work to be little and they dont understand why I work so hard and still don't get the results I want. I had a "friend" tell me today " you just need to work harder" i could take that constructively until she said "you're obviously not working at it enough... it cant be that hard"
i broke down and came back to the page where people really understand that it CAN be that hard!

Replies

  • cownancy
    cownancy Posts: 291
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    OMG....people are so insensitive and don't like to look outside their own experiences to learn empathy. I UNDERSTAND! I know exactly what you mean!!! It's damned hard work! Sometimes you just get tired of having to work so hard at something so many others just take for granted! But, you are doing it. You will be successful and just keep going and celebrate every little victory with a YA HOOOOOO, fist pump and a huge smile on your face, and don't tell the skinny b#tches why. It will make them wonder what you've been doing!

    xxxoo
  • cownancy
    cownancy Posts: 291
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    OMG....people are so insensitive and don't like to look outside their own experiences to learn empathy. I UNDERSTAND! I know exactly what you mean!!! It's damned hard work! Sometimes you just get tired of having to work so hard at something so many others just take for granted! But, you are doing it. You will be successful and just keep going and celebrate every little victory with a YA HOOOOOO, fist pump and a huge smile on your face, and don't tell the skinny b#tches why. It will make them wonder what you've been doing!

    xxxoo
  • mistyb47711
    mistyb47711 Posts: 861 Member
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    it is hard.....someone that has not put on a lot of weight will not understand....it's ok we got your back! and if your seeing progres just says you are working hard dont let anyone bring you down :)
  • Rocki_
    Rocki_ Posts: 166 Member
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    Hang in there, darlin'!! You know how to get what you want... and we're all here to help if we can. Keep at it and you WILL succeed. Never doubt that!! :)
  • lstnlondry
    lstnlondry Posts: 1,794 Member
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    You are finding this out at 19, they will find out at 21 when alcohol kicks in, babies come or when they get close to 40 when it is hard as hell!! You have the advantage!! And I am so happy you have a place to vent. Good luck with your journey!!
  • mimi7grands
    mimi7grands Posts: 616
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    Focus on the positive Kacee. You've done a fantastic job of maintaining your loss. Give yourself the credit you deserve. It's true some people don't understand the struggle. Nod your head, smile politely, and don't listen to a thing they say! Good luck. You're doing this!
  • stella77
    stella77 Posts: 282
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    People are *kitten*. I don't even discuss my weightloss plans or anything apart from here. This is one of the friendliest sites and I am yet to see someoen tell someone something so rude.
  • jcannon15
    jcannon15 Posts: 148
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    my boyfriends been blessed with a very fast metabalism,ie he can eat whatever his heart desires. Me not so much, i kno the poor me thing gets on his nerves but having him tell me if i want to lose 50 lbs just lose 50 lbs and stop whining about it ,seriously hurts my feelings its just not that easy .
  • vshizuru
    vshizuru Posts: 6
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    yeah , some people just don't get it. My aunt has one beautiful skinny daughter and she kept saying that to me about How easily she can get that beautiful body and I just don't pay attention enough on what I am working for. At first I felt so broke about that.
    But then I realized ,People are different. So how can they understand what we are going through.If they never be like us.

    Then just stop to thinking about what other people say something negative about me and continue my plan.
    You are doing great. Fighting :)
  • ingridrose
    ingridrose Posts: 12
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    Wow sorry you don't have that support structure for the weight loss. I am also having a difficult time and I feel like I don't have anyone behind me on this weight loss journey. Everyone says that I should just be happy the way I am. I am happy but that doesn't mean I can't strive to do something better to improve my health. Thank goodness I found MFP!

    Well if you DO want more support you can always add me or find other supportive people on here. i always come to the website to get re-focused and stay positive about my diet/working out.

    Ingrid
  • lulucall911
    lulucall911 Posts: 51 Member
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    I feel the same way i grew up with my sister having a very fast metabolism and being able to eat and do whatever she wanted, so for me i grew up being told their must be something wrong with me and told to go to doctors because how could i be "fat" when my sister is so thin. Now i just avoid the subject with most people and only tell those closest to me luckily now i have my husband for support.
  • caroltina
    caroltina Posts: 453 Member
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    I understand too! I was a really athletic kid, then hormones kicked in - or didn't in my case, it is rotten always working. Apart from a few good friends I think people think - oh she must be sneaking food - I have learnt not to care about those people now - doing it for me not them so- balls to them. Hope they get some compassion, do what's right for u
  • caroltina
    caroltina Posts: 453 Member
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    I understand too! I was a really athletic kid, then hormones kicked in - or didn't in my case, it is rotten always working. Apart from a few good friends I think people think - oh she must be sneaking food - I have learnt not to care about those people now - doing it for me not them so- balls to them. Hope they get some compassion, do what's right for u
  • MysterriGal
    MysterriGal Posts: 52 Member
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    We understand here!
    Its really hard to be the "big girl" in the group, especially at your age, when a lot of people are so tiny. 19 is when a lot of crazy stuff happened to me I know, and its only really settled down now! I couldn't lose the weight then, I didn't have the discipline or the ability to focus, so I really admire you for being on here and doing this.
    You having so much going on, so, I imagine, do your friends, and its hard for them to see past their own skinny nose. They won't know what its like until their older, metabolism dies eventually! There is a reason so many people trying to lose weight are trying to get back to their "High school weight", it means a lot of those skinny girls don't stay skinny!
    My point is, as much as you want to smack these people sometimes (I know I did) Your in a world completely beyond their comprehension, and your getting a leg up on them, as you know now how important that healthy life style is, before you get older and its even harder.
    What I eventually learned is that you can use the negativity. It makes you sad or angry, and normally my solution to that would be to eat a cheeseburger. Now I work it off. Power walk or run, and every time your foot hits the pavement, picture yourself stomping on the mean peoples skinny butts. Works well for anything your doing really.
    Sorry for writing a book, I just have one last thing. Does it matter if they understand, really? I used to think so. I used to have my mother tell me all the time how I should really start losing weight now, and I'm just too big and I'm going to die some weight related disease (and this started when I was much smaller than I am) and this used to kill me. And it was always the "just do it already" attitude. I've recently realized, the state of my body is my concern and mine alone. Its me who has to do the work, its me who wants to be healthy, its me that wants to look and feel good, and its me that I'm doing all this for. Once I got that through my head, the comments go in one ear and out the other.
    So do it for yourself. Find support in the people here and anyone in your life who can look beyond themselves into another persons reality. With everyone else just smile and nod politely, remember they don't know what their talking about, and work as hard as you can.
    My book is over, feel better and good luck honey, and feel free to add me!
  • Rocki_
    Rocki_ Posts: 166 Member
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    It will catch up with him some day. It always does. THEN he'll get it. ;-)

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