How do you help someone who doesnt want help?

ginadaye

I can tell you that there is aboslutely no way you can help someone who doesn't want help. My husband and I have been married 42 years. I am overweight, he is NOT. About 15 years ago he became diabetic. I tried to help him with diet and exercise, but he wouldn't let me so he moved on to pills for his diabetes. To make a long story short . . . he is on four, yes 4, insulin shots a day. Or at least he is supposed to be. He takes them when he feels like it. He lives in denial. I have cried, begged, and threatened to leave rather than watch him kill himself (he has had a heart stint put in and now has Diabetes Retinopathy, but when I explained to him how serious a problem it can be, his response was, "Do you know anyone who has gone blind from diabetes?" He is my soulmate and I love him more than life itself, but because he can look in the mirror and see someone who looks great for 65, he lives in DENIAL big time.

I just found out I am diabetic and I went into a panic mode. Joined MFP and what do you think he did the very next day (after I expressed my fear of being diabetic)? Went out and bought me six mini packages of those little chocolate covered donuts that I love!

No, you can't change him. Either love him like he is or look for someone else. I love my hubby, pray and worry over him day and night. But now I have myself to worry about, so I won't be nagging him anymore.

Take care.

solflyer81

I understand completely. I feel you on the diabetes. It runs in my family. My grandmother has lived with it for almost 20 years now. I dont know how she did it. And one of my biggest fears is that I will get it. So good luck to you and congrats on being here, it definately helps.