needing someone to talk to

amccarville

i know this isnt really the place to whine about issues other than fitness but just thought i would try. i do daycare in my home and also have 3 girls of my own. really having a hard time today. got into a agrument with my oldest right before school, forgot to send snow pants today so 2 of my girls had to miss their first recess. have been very cranky lately. just feeling like a bad mom right now. i give so much love and patients to the kids for 10 hours everyday, and when it comes time to be with my own kids i am out of it and sick of it. i just want to be a good mom and sometimes feel like i am using up all my energy on kids that arent mine. i would love to talk to my friends about this but m,ost of my firneds are the mothers of the kids i take care of so it makes it hard. my husband has been great today. he had to listen to me early this morning but i just dont think he knows how i am feeling. i want nothing more than to be a good mom. help me gain some sanity. any good tips on how to get myself ready to go at 5:30pm so i can be all that i can be for my family:sad:

amccarville

i know this isnt really the place to whine about issues other than fitness but just thought i would try. i do daycare in my home and also have 3 girls of my own. really having a hard time today. got into a agrument with my oldest right before school, forgot to send snow pants today so 2 of my girls had to miss their first recess. have been very cranky lately. just feeling like a bad mom right now. i give so much love and patients to the kids for 10 hours everyday, and when it comes time to be with my own kids i am out of it and sick of it. i just want to be a good mom and sometimes feel like i am using up all my energy on kids that arent mine. i would love to talk to my friends about this but m,ost of my firneds are the mothers of the kids i take care of so it makes it hard. my husband has been great today. he had to listen to me early this morning but i just dont think he knows how i am feeling. i want nothing more than to be a good mom. help me gain some sanity. any good tips on how to get myself ready to go at 5:30pm so i can be all that i can be for my family:sad:

aubs057

I think that a natural part of being a mom is being too self-critical. Your kids love you no matter what, and everybody gets in arguments with their parents one time or another. It's just part of life. Instead of feeling down about it, maybe just take this as motivation to fix it! Get your kids snowpants and let them play in the snow after school since they didn't at recess? And just let them know you love them, that's all they need Don't be too hard on yourself, I am sure you are doing fantastically!!! Just put a smile on, and try your best, and remember that you are loved!

tabbiekaye23

I know what you mean in a way. I leave at 6:45 in the morning and dont get home until 5:30 at night. By the time I have to cook supper, do laundry, clean up, and do homework I am exhausted. I forgot to sign my sons papers so he got in trouble. My husband helps, he even cooks most nights, but by time you get off work it seems like the day should be over but it is really just starting. I dont realy have any advice because I am going through the same thing. Love my kids and want to do the best for them by working to have exta money but then they lose out because I am so exhausted in the evenings.

amccarville

thanks aubs057. :happy:

amccarville

i hear ya tabbie kay23, i am home all day and i still cant keep up on everything, granted my house if full of kids but still.:ohwell:

Losing_It

I totally know where you are coming from. I was babysitting 2 other kids besides my two for almost 2 years and when it got to the point that I felt like I was being "mean" to my own after the others had left, I knew it was time to quit. Good luck to you!:flowerforyou:

Lyn_Matthews

Don't be so hard on yourself. Remember we aren't super moms and our kids don't expect us to be. All you can do is your best. We all slip up every now and again but the kids don't hold it against us, so let it go. Is there anyway you can take a 5-15 minute break after the other kids go home so you can regroup before taking on your own family?? Kids are smarter than we think. Tell them mommy needs some time to herself and then they will have your full attention. I'm pretty sure they will give up 10 minutes to have you focused on them for the rest of the evening.

Good luck. Keep your head up. You are a wonderful mother and I'm pretty sure your kids think the world of you! :flowerforyou:

Mireille

I just sent you a pm. :flowerforyou:

cmriverside

i would love to talk to my friends about this but most of my firneds are the mothers of the kids i take care of so it makes it hard.

I grabbed this sentence from your post, because I was thinking how grateful your friends must be to have someone they can trust caring for their children. I would think they feel guilty in having to leave their children in day care, and the fact that you are available to give them this gift is very important.

I agree with the above posts that children are resilient, they are understanding, and if you ask them for a few minutes to yourself, they will be happy to help. Then maybe take a walk with them, or do an exercise DVD - the endorphins from exercise will make you all feel soooo good.

We are always here for you. This too will pass. :flowerforyou:

Cheryl

diannholland1965

First off remember that this situation is ONLY TEMPORARY!
The FACT that you DESIRE being a good mom is proof that you are IN FACT a GOOD MOM!
You CARE and that tells me that you are a caring Mom.
Take as MUCH time as you can to tell your children that you love them. Oh and I heard this last night and KNEW that I would need it today! So THIS MUST have come to me FOR YOU.
Remember to ALWAYS notice the things you LIKE about your children MORE than the things you don't like.
Story regarding this is as follows.
"I once went with my son to sea world and after we were done we went to the Fat Freddy show. Fat Freddy is a Penguin that is trained to do everything his trainer told him to. He rang a bell, did a dance and tossed a ball in a hoop, and then after he was done with his toys, he put them back in their box... Now I KNEW that my son was smart than a penguin, But anytime I want my son to do something he wants to argue and fight about it. So after the show I asked the trainer. So, How do you get Freddy to do everything that you want him to do? She took a look at my son, and then looked and me smiled and said.
Unlike most parents, Whenever Freddy does something that is close to what I want him to do, I give him a Hug and a fish.
Well I knew that my son would not do anything for a raw fish, But it dawned on me that I was turning my son into a little monster because every time he did something bad I noticed and when he did something good I ignored him. I was training him to do bad in order to get my attention."
The Moral of the story is. Take notice MORE of the goodness of your children, and take LESS notice of the things that they do wrong.
I do hope this helps you dear.
As Moms and Dads, We are all here for you!
--Diann...

amccarville

i would love to talk to my friends about this but most of my firneds are the mothers of the kids i take care of so it makes it hard.

I grabbed this sentence from your post, because I was thinking how grateful your friends must be to have someone they can trust caring for their children. I would think they feel guilty in having to leave their children in day care, and the fact that you are available to give them this gift is very important.

I agree with the above posts that children are resilient, they are understanding, and if you ask them for a few minutes to yourself, they will be happy to help. Then maybe take a walk with them, or do an exercise DVD - the endorphins from exercise will make you all feel soooo good.

We are always here for you. This too will pass. :flowerforyou:

Cheryl

thanks cheryl:happy:

amccarville

Diann your story is just what i needed. i to just saw that last week and need to start noticing and rewarding all the wonderful things my girls do.

on another note ladies. just ate ice cream.......darn it!!!! at least i have the calories for it today. hope i dont go over with supper. Maybe a good workout is what i need!!!!!!!!!!! take my feeling out on the eliptical:grumble:

diannholland1965

You have had a ruff day one thing of icecream is NOT going to hurt you.
Now... If you are the whole CARTON! Then you might have something to worry about! :laugh:
I am VERY glad that I heard that on TV last night to share the story with you today.
Go do your workout and Dance with your children!
Sing a silly song, and be greatful for such wonderful kids!
We all understand, and as I said before, We are all here for you dear!
--Diann...