Dear Cake...

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I don't know how to put this but I think it's time for us to part ways. While I appreciate you've been there for me in the past I've spent a bit of time thinking lately and I'm not so sure you have my best interests at heart.

I know that I have professed my love for you on more than one occasion and I do admire your many different facets (carrot, banana, et al) but I think I was under a sugar-coated intoxication. Truth is - I don't love you anymore. I don't want to be your friend and I'd really appreciate it if you could distance yourself from me from now on. No more surprise visits when I'm at mum's house, no more consoling myself with you when I've got nothing better to do.

I'm also concerned about the damage you've caused between me and other things. My lovely skirt that fit me perfectly this time last year will barely even speak to me these days. And yes, I put the blame for this at your feet. And let's not even talk about my bikini or short shorts.

I'm so sorry cake - I hope you understand and I hope that maybe, sometime in the future, I might be able to see you again without the need to devour you completely.

Yours - a skinnier me...

Replies

  • Dimason
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    I don't know how to put this but I think it's time for us to part ways. While I appreciate you've been there for me in the past I've spent a bit of time thinking lately and I'm not so sure you have my best interests at heart.

    I know that I have professed my love for you on more than one occasion and I do admire your many different facets (carrot, banana, et al) but I think I was under a sugar-coated intoxication. Truth is - I don't love you anymore. I don't want to be your friend and I'd really appreciate it if you could distance yourself from me from now on. No more surprise visits when I'm at mum's house, no more consoling myself with you when I've got nothing better to do.

    I'm also concerned about the damage you've caused between me and other things. My lovely skirt that fit me perfectly this time last year will barely even speak to me these days. And yes, I put the blame for this at your feet. And let's not even talk about my bikini or short shorts.

    I'm so sorry cake - I hope you understand and I hope that maybe, sometime in the future, I might be able to see you again without the need to devour you completely.

    Yours - a skinnier me...
  • Janie0001
    Janie0001 Posts: 54 Member
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    :cry: so sad for you and cake. I am sure you can move on with your new found friends, carrotts, lettuce and so on. I just hope cake finds someone to move on to I just hope it ain't ME.

    Thanks for the laugh :laugh:
  • figmentj
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    Aww. Poor cake.
  • lunglady
    lunglady Posts: 526 Member
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    LOL :laugh:
  • RainbowNtheWaterfall
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    so you wouldn't mind if me and cake met for lunch every now and then? No suprises, right?....:laugh:
  • Lizjkp
    Lizjkp Posts: 278
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    Awwwwwwwwwwwww bought a tear to my eye: sad: poor CAKE I will soon have to break the same news :devil: to his friends, biscuits and chocolates, you let him down so gently I now feel that I can do the same. Thanks LOL :laugh: :bigsmile: :wink:

    "Life may not be the party we hoped for :grumble: but while we are here we might as well dance! :drinker: "
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
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    I don't know how to put this but I think it's time for us to part ways. While I appreciate you've been there for me in the past I've spent a bit of time thinking lately and I'm not so sure you have my best interests at heart.

    I know that I have professed my love for you on more than one occasion and I do admire your many different facets (carrot, banana, et al) but I think I was under a sugar-coated intoxication. Truth is - I don't love you anymore. I don't want to be your friend and I'd really appreciate it if you could distance yourself from me from now on. No more surprise visits when I'm at mum's house, no more consoling myself with you when I've got nothing better to do.

    I'm also concerned about the damage you've caused between me and other things. My lovely skirt that fit me perfectly this time last year will barely even speak to me these days. And yes, I put the blame for this at your feet. And let's not even talk about my bikini or short shorts.

    I'm so sorry cake - I hope you understand and I hope that maybe, sometime in the future, I might be able to see you again without the need to devour you completely.

    Yours - a skinnier me...

    oh...you wrote that so eloquently!!:drinker: Made me smile but also made me realize that cake was getting it's butt kicked to the curb and would be out by sundown!!:huh: :bigsmile:
  • FitJoani
    FitJoani Posts: 2,173 Member
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    This is cute but for me its always been southern food(country steak with gravy cobblers biscuits and gravy you name it I ate it) so you inspired me to write
    Dear Southern Fried Goodness,
    You and I used to be such good friends we used to spend binges together we used to go hand in hand. You were part of who I was as a "fat" girl. I have learned that eventually you no longer want what you cant have so I am glad we parted ways. I felt hurt for some time when I couldnt taste your deep fied yumminess then you began to make me sick and you still do. I want to thank you for that because if you didnt I may be swayed and tempted to cheat on my body....Farewell