Did he do his "time"?
Hi Guys and Gals!
I need some anonymous opinions.
My BFF met a guy online and they have really hit it off; on the phone. They speak and text throughout the day, also in the evenings before going to sleep since the day they exchanged numbers. He lives in another state and before meeting her,because of his business, was planning on moving to her state. She says they have alot in common, close in age, similar goals. etc. From what she tells me she is really, really liking this man.
They are meeting for the first time next week, after 2 months of phone talk and phone sex, they feel love for eachother already.lol.
Now here is where I need your opinions.
She has a "No sex for X amount of time" rule.
DOes the time on the phone count towards his "time" or does it begin after the first meet? He's only coming in for a weekend. She says it does I say it doesn't. :laugh:
Discuss :flowerforyou:
Thank you for taking the time to read and respond.
I need some anonymous opinions.
My BFF met a guy online and they have really hit it off; on the phone. They speak and text throughout the day, also in the evenings before going to sleep since the day they exchanged numbers. He lives in another state and before meeting her,because of his business, was planning on moving to her state. She says they have alot in common, close in age, similar goals. etc. From what she tells me she is really, really liking this man.
They are meeting for the first time next week, after 2 months of phone talk and phone sex, they feel love for eachother already.lol.
Now here is where I need your opinions.
She has a "No sex for X amount of time" rule.
DOes the time on the phone count towards his "time" or does it begin after the first meet? He's only coming in for a weekend. She says it does I say it doesn't. :laugh:
Discuss :flowerforyou:
Thank you for taking the time to read and respond.
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Replies
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I say it does....she has still talked and got to know him for that amount of time, she just has not physically been with him.....0
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I think it probably doesn't matter. They'll end up sleeping together anyway.0
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Why does it matter to you? If she wants to have sex with him, she can have sex with him. Sounds more to me like you're not approving of the way she met him and therefore you don't want them to be intimate.
That being said, I know how you feel. My best friend met a guy this way too. Truthfully, all of the talking/texting required them to get to know each other very well very quickly and they've been together for 7 years now and neither could be happier.0 -
Is the "No sex for X amount of time" rule there just for an arbitrary reason or is it there with the intent of getting to know someone better. If it's to get to know someone and over the past 2 months they have, in fact, gotten to know each other then he has put in his time. If it's just an arbitrary time line to "make him want it more" then no.0
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I think that you learn a LOT from someone when u are around them. My fiance and i were apart for about 2-3 months before we he came back home and even though we talked all day long and text all day long and i knew him very well i feel as if i learned the most when we spent the time together. People can be anyone they want to be through texting and they can talk themselves up all day but you know who the true person is when you are face to face!0
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Personally I don't think it does... people can be completely different in person than they are on line and on the phone.0
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It's her decision. If she wants to, I say do it to it. If not, don't. That's between her and him. Not to be decided by a jury.0
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nah she should see what happens............ she is in control ............. if there is that sexual "spark" in real life......... and they are both adults then what the heck !0
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I would say that he did “half his time”. Getting to know someone on the internet/phone is completely different then meeting someone in person. I would suggest to the friend that they use this first weekend as more opportunity to get to know each other without complicating things with sex.0
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Well this is her arbitrary rule, so she can come up with her own arbitrary special case to handle this. :laugh:0
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My two cents: talking online, on the phone, etc. and building that strong of a relationship before actually meeting in person is so dangerous (to your wee lil' emotions). This is why I meet anyone i'm interested within a week or two... expectations get so built up and then you realize he has horrid halitosis, a tiny little friend, and he keeps your change.
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well they've already had phone sex, so in some ways they have already been together- definitely been intimate just not physical. I think the "no sex for X amount of time" ship has sailed.0
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Well this is her arbitrary rule, so she can come up with her own arbitrary special case to handle this. :laugh:
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!0 -
It counts if when he meets her, who he is in 'real' life is the same as who he was before. They have talked on the phone, that is a plus.
I just was at my best friend's wedding a couple weeks ago, and they met online. I was skeptical (okay, more like, I was convinced he was a cerial killer or something) and she falls in love waaaay too fast, but they ended up being the perfect match.
Having an 'x amount of time' rule seems kind of silly to me. It's different in every situation. Unless that 'x amount of time' is like, a week. Haha!!
Good luck to your friend. If their relationship is anything like my friend's, you better start working on your Matron Of Honor stuff!!
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It's her decision. If she wants to, I say do it to it. If not, don't. That's between her and him. Not to be decided by a jury.
^ THIS0 -
as much 'chemistry' as you can have talking on the phone, sometimes things are different in person. I've had great chemistry with guys before meeting (though generally not that long) and then something about them isn't right when we met. Just no click in person. If the spark is there, it's there. I'm more about whether the feeling is right rather than some randomly chosen time. I knew one person who figured that if you met someone on a cruise, that time counted for 3 or 5 times the amount of "regular dating time", but we won't get into the weird physics involved in justifying jumping a virtual stranger.0
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nope...he didn't do enough "time" until she has a ring on her finger lol0
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Yes to sex! Always yes to sex!
almost always.0 -
Sounds like a f*cked up rule to me ~ just sayin'0
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My two cents: talking online, on the phone, etc. and building that strong of a relationship before actually meeting in person is so dangerous (to your wee lil' emotions). This is why I meet anyone i'm interested within a week or two... expectations get so built up and then you realize he has horrid halitosis, a tiny little friend, and he keeps your change.
LMAO!
You poor thing. However, if you would have spoken to him on the phone for two months, you would have known he wasn't a good, uh, tipper. :laugh:0 -
Yes to sex! Always yes to sex!
almost always.
:flowerforyou:0 -
I'd say THEY BOTH put in their time.... So, they should get their freak on, they already mentally, emotionaly and verbally did.0
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Is the "No sex for X amount of time" rule there just for an arbitrary reason or is it there with the intent of getting to know someone better. If it's to get to know someone and over the past 2 months they have, in fact, gotten to know each other then he has put in his time. If it's just an arbitrary time line to "make him want it more" then no.
The rule IS for getting to know them.0 -
I'd say THEY BOTH put in their time.... So, they should get their freak on, they already mentally, emotionaly and verbally did.
You are correct in that sense.
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I think it probably doesn't matter. They'll end up sleeping together anyway.
^this.
p.s. think that rule is b.s. If you have chemistry do it, if not, meh....0 -
I'm a bad one when it comes to sex.
I'm had a friend with benefits (after knowing him for less than 4 months), used a guy for sexting (not proud of that, after like the first time talking on the phone with him I had no interest in him, but in my defense he was a jerk and our second time on the phone that's when we started sexting ), and my finace the first date.
I got used, was a user and then the most amazing guy came along and I was immediately attracted to him.
When I ask people "how long till sex?" most respond, 1mo.+ .
I get the feeling you're worried about your friend? I understand because my friends worried about me, but in the end we all make our own choices.0 -
nope...he didn't do enough "time" until she has a ring on her finger lol
What year is it where you live? :laugh:0 -
Okay,
I don't really care when she gives "it" up. It's hers and she will still be my BFF. :laugh:
However, it is the FIRST time she has engaged in a Long distance relationship and asked me what I think. I wanted to hear what others think.
Like someone else posted, they probably will get together, if things are as great as she describes.
Thanks you guys for your responses. :flowerforyou:0 -
nope...he didn't do enough "time" until she has a ring on her finger lol
What year is it where you live? :laugh:
bahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
nope...he didn't do enough "time" until she has a ring on her finger lol
What year is it where you live? :laugh:
No you didn't :laugh:0
This discussion has been closed.
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