My 3 year old makes me cry

ginny1214

my son is 3 and a half and can certainly be a handful. I've tried spanking,time outs, rewarding the things he does (sticker chart for 4 things and after ten days a toy for a reward). But like today I took him and my daughter to the park, and he kept throwing sand, I got onto him, did it again, put him on bench timeout at the park then he threw sand in a boys face, after sincerely apologizing to boys father and making my son apologize, we left the park, me scolding him all the way home. I am going through a hard time and I'm trying my best as a newly single mom, but I feel so defeated by him at times, he just never listens to me. I'm so frustrated

voluptas63

Whatever you do, DO NOT GIVE UP.

Also, since you're "newly single"... was the split between his father and you? He may be acting out his feelings. At 3yrs old, he can't really articulate what's bothering him. Be patient, love and understand but also keep up with discipline. You'll do him no favors by giving in.

ambercole

It's not much help, but i'll trade my son whose in junior high for a 3yr old anyday!!!!! it was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much easier back then.

ginny1214

Lol ya between hisfather and I. About a month ago. I felt at first he was so bad, then he got better, now bad again. I love him, but it's so overwhelming. I'm scared for his behavior in the future...very scared!!

juliecat1

I have a 3y/o too... they are a challenge. And like someone else said... hes likely reacting to your recent split and doesnt know how to articulate it. They are all about boundary pushing and limit testing at this point. Just be consistent. Make sure youre using a reward system that is simple enough for him to understand and get behind. And... this is important.... sometimes its ok for mom to take a break and be good to herself. Youll be amazed how refreshed you feel and some of his stuff may not bother you quite so much. Good luck!

thegymbunny

Do NOT give in, I'm struggling with the same issues myself. And it's compounded by the guilt you feel about the situation.


But as said you are doing no favors giving in.

You are the mother and you need to display you are in CONTROL of the situation at all times.

I've taken away toys, time out, early bed... ect

you have to find out what works

ginny1214

Yea, like his sticker chart he gets a sticker if he sleeps in his bed, one for helping with my parents dogs, one for helping pick up toys, and one for playing at the park. I googled some stuff and I thought I'd give this a whirl, and it does work good, but I mean he's bored with it, and he hasn't even done e whole ten days yet lol he is two days away. So I was thinking of when he gets done with it, I'll have a surprise for him the next morning with a new sticker chart, then maybe he will get the concept

thegymbunny

What I've tried is a treat for my daughter if she can behave for a whole month.

Now.....in all honesty she will "lose" that treat about 20 times a week the weeks I have her.

So then she has to earn them back.

It's a vicious cycle, but I will not have a spoiled nasty child.

ginny1214

What I've tried is a treat for my daughter if she can behave for a whole month.

Now.....in all honesty she will "lose" that treat about 20 times a week the weeks I have her.

So then she has to earn them back.

It's a vicious cycle, but I will not have a spoiled nasty child.

The only reason I'm lucky right now anyways is his dAd won't have him. I'm in anoer state with him, so luckily I don't have to worry about me then his dad then me, ya know? I just feel like he stops and thinks about what he is doing ten does it ughh

PlanetVelma

Do NOT give in, I'm struggling with the same issues myself. And it's compounded by the guilt you feel about the situation.


But as said you are doing no favors giving in.

You are the mother and you need to display you are in CONTROL of the situation at all times.

I've taken away toys, time out, early bed... ect

you have to find out what works

This!

My son was super easy, he had a few toys that I could take away and he would straighten back up. Now my daughter...lord have mercy...she was a little terror sometimes! She wouldn't apologize, would refuse to stay in time out, wake up before dawn and eat an entire pan of brownies (she climbed up onto the counters)...yea she could really try your patience.

She's 9 now, so they do grow out of it (to some degree LOL). It's just a matter of finding what toy he really, really, REALLY likes and when he's naughty take it away. I would always take away something from my daughter and then put it in a place where she could SEE it but not reach it. lol

Another thing that really worked for my kids was to put them on a pretty strict schedule, that really helped them (and me!).

StaciO

You really do have to find what will work for the individual child. My oldest son would behave immediately if he was told he couldn't go outside. But my middle son could have cared less if he couldn't go outside. But like mentioned above if I took a toy away and put it somewhere he could see it but not reach it the punishment became effective. My daughter now all you have to do is look at her with a mad face and she toes the line.