feeding babies junk food

strapple

my sister in law feeds her six month old daughter pizza and cake (i wish i was joking) HOW DO I EXPRESS THIS CONCERN WITHOUT OVERSTEPPING MY BOUNDARIES?

his entire family watches her eat brownies and pizza while smiling and laughing about how cute it is
meanwhile im just horrified! itd be different if it was just for really special occasions (i suppose) but its very often. i honestly dont think she even buys her baby food because whenever i see them eating a meal, she just eats what the adults eat but mashed up into bits. this includes mac and cheese, chicken nuggets, pizza bites, burritos, pudding packs, all kinds of fast food and just tons of things that even adults should only have in moderation. NEVER veggies or fruits!

should i just not say anything? i dont want them to dislike me or be rude because they are newly acquired in-laws but it seriously shocks me to see!


EDIT: ive politely talked to my husband about it before and while he completely agrees that a baby should never be fed food like that, he also is afraid to say anything for fear that he would offend them. so its not me vs him its pretty much us vs his family

zorbaru

unfortunately you just need to grin and bear it. its hard to pass judgement on someone elses parenting. i wouldnt be happy if someone did it to me.

maybe bring it up with your partner and see what they think, but make it a general observation like "OMG i cant beleive she eats pizza at such a young age"

strapple

unfortunately you just need to grin and bear it. its hard to pass judgement on someone elses parenting. i wouldnt be happy if someone did it to me.

maybe bring it up with your partner and see what they think, but make it a general observation like "OMG i cant beleive she eats pizza at such a young age"

my husband agrees with me but hes also afraid of hurting their feelings. i suppose i wouldnt want someone passing judgment on me if i were a mother, but if i was doing something incredibly harmful to my baby i think i would want someone to tell me!

i mean, im sure id be offended at first but in the end i feel id appreciate sound advice. im not trying to slam her or judge her im just trying to find out how my husband and i can address this issue with his entire family

it also scares me for when i have children because i wouldnt even consider ever giving my baby anything like that and if theyre okay with it, idk if we'd even want them babysitting!!

suzycreamcheese

you cant say anything tbh.

Other peoples parenting is just one of those things you cant judge to their face.

Its absolutely fine for a 6mth old to have what their parents eat, but preferably it should be proper food and not high sodium crap. Babyfood is a con. If i was going to say anything id say "oh thats very salty for a baby dont you think" but probably i wouldnt say anything.

strapple

you cant say anything tbh.

Other peoples parenting is just one of those things you cant judge to their face.

Its absolutely fine for a 6mth old to have what their parents eat, but preferably it should be proper food and not high sodium crap. Babyfood is a con. If i was going to say anything id say "oh thats very salty for a baby dont you think" but probably i wouldnt say anything.

;{ i guess i should save my opinions for when i have my own child and they babysit. also, i agree about babyfood. i plan on making my own with veggies! (faaaar from now tho! we are newlyweds!)

her child being fed bad food is just something we see daily, so for both of us its very hard to see in our face so often without saying anything. i also just feel so badly for that baby. im sure shes already addicted to fatty foods.

sugarbone

In my opinion, making your child obese and not coming anywhere NEAR their dietary needs should be considered child abuse.

msfazer

I would say just grin and bear it I know I would be very upset if someone said that to me even if I knew I was doing wrong. My youngest is 10months and eats loads of vegetables and fruit he likes grilled chicken and fish but I have to admit he has tried the odd bit of junk food here and there but its definitely not a regular thing.

bigredhearts

i once watched a friend of mine give her 6 month old a sip of her amp, and i MOST DEFINATELY said something. i mentioned the contents of the drink and the effects of feeding her child garbage at a young age and how it will influence the childs future habits. they think its funny and laughed at e while shoveling fast food in their faces so while they laughed at me i looked at them and shrugged while i said, "alrighty then, feed your kid what you want. but dont come crying when shes 5 and weighs 100 lbs..." and i left it at that. but i guess thats just me... also may i mention that the only food i ever see them feed their kid is fast food, candys, sodas (WITH CAFFEINE!!!) etc... how can one keep their mouth shut when a child is forced to eat unhealthy because the parent dont want to put forth the extra effort in making sure their child has well-balanced, nutritious meals?

strapple

In my opinion, making your child obese and not coming anywhere NEAR their dietary needs should be considered child abuse.

YES I AGREE! i see what shes doing as legit abuse and it offends me outright!

strapple

I would say just grin and bear it I know I would be very upset if someone said that to me even if I knew I was doing wrong. My youngest is 10months and eats loads of vegetables and fruit he likes grilled chicken and fish but I have to admit he has tried the odd bit of junk food here and there but its definitely not a regular thing.

i hope i can be the kind of mom you are!

i think its important to raise a child healthy but introduce them to sweets/fats as a 'sometimes food' and teach that you can eat bad things but they are treats and NOT meals or nutrients

otherwise when they get much older they may relapse because they were NEVER allowed that type of food. its important to teach balance and not just restrict everything.

strapple

i once watched a friend of mine give her 6 month old a sip of her amp, and i MOST DEFINATELY said something. i mentioned the contents of the drink and the effects of feeding her child garbage at a young age and how it will influence the childs future habits. they think its funny and laughed at e while shoveling fast food in their faces so while they laughed at me i looked at them and shrugged while i said, "alrighty then, feed your kid what you want. but dont come crying when shes 5 and weighs 100 lbs..." and i left it at that. but i guess thats just me... also may i mention that the only food i ever see them feed their kid is fast food, candys, sodas (WITH CAFFEINE!!!) etc... how can one keep their mouth shut when a child is forced to eat unhealthy because the parent dont want to put forth the extra effort in making sure their child has well-balanced, nutritious meals?

things like this make me sick! im not a mother so i may be missing something about the difficulty of getting a child to eat. but i honestly feel like it shouldnt be that hard to feed your child in a way that will make them healthy and not fat!

i watched my sister in law complain about a woman she saw in a restaurant giving their baby soda WHILE she was making her toddler a hot pocket because he didnt want to eat white turkey breast on thanksgiving. how are people so blind to their own wrongs but able to see others?

msfazer

I would say just grin and bear it I know I would be very upset if someone said that to me even if I knew I was doing wrong. My youngest is 10months and eats loads of vegetables and fruit he likes grilled chicken and fish but I have to admit he has tried the odd bit of junk food here and there but its definitely not a regular thing.

i hope i can be the kind of mom you are!

i think its important to raise a child healthy but introduce them to sweets/fats as a 'sometimes food' and teach that you can eat bad things but they are treats and NOT meals or nutrients

otherwise when they get much older they may relapse because they were NEVER allowed that type of food. its important to teach balance and not just restrict everything.

I completely agree with that as when I was younger I had a friend who's parents never aloud any junk food ever in their house and wheb she got old enough to get pocket money all she ever bought was junk. I remember her mum saying to her "how cone your so fat when we don't let you eat junk?" I think if you ban somethin completely it makes it more disirable so that's why I let my three have some things here and there.

veganbaum

I kind of think that because they're family, you have a right, and nearly a responsibility, to say something, I just don't know how you would go about that without it blowing up in your face. Maybe if more people had things like this pointed out to them to simply make them think and reconsider, they might make better choices. I dunno, in our country (U.S.), the whole "it takes a village" doesn't really apply. Of course people can make their own choices, but we are talking about basic nutrition for an infant. Wish I could offer some helpful advice.

strapple

I would say just grin and bear it I know I would be very upset if someone said that to me even if I knew I was doing wrong. My youngest is 10months and eats loads of vegetables and fruit he likes grilled chicken and fish but I have to admit he has tried the odd bit of junk food here and there but its definitely not a regular thing.

i hope i can be the kind of mom you are!

i think its important to raise a child healthy but introduce them to sweets/fats as a 'sometimes food' and teach that you can eat bad things but they are treats and NOT meals or nutrients

otherwise when they get much older they may relapse because they were NEVER allowed that type of food. its important to teach balance and not just restrict everything.

I completely agree with that as when I was younger I had a friend who's parents never aloud any junk food ever in their house and wheb she got old enough to get pocket money all she ever bought was junk. I remember her mum saying to her "how cone your so fat when we don't let you eat junk?" I think if you ban somethin completely it makes it more disirable so that's why I let my three have some things here and there.

i completley agree! i had a mormon friend in high school (totally not slamming religion here) who was never allowed caffeine and as soon as she turned 18 she was addicted to caffeine and alcohol because she wanted stimulants!

im jewish, and i still think my children should try pork and shellfish and even red meat because i feel its important for everyone to try everything without restrictions. its more helpful to teach a child proper choices than to just say I SAY NO AND THATS WHY!

so referring to my original post, i would be okay with giving a 6 month old a little taste of cake or pizza....but never ever should it be the main diet!

bigredhearts

i as well, am not a parent, so often are my opinions mocked. HOWEVER, a child follows examples, and if the example is an apple vs. a candy bar and the child sees the parent eating a candy bar, 9 times out of 10 they will go with whatever the parent is eating. so for a parent to say that someone without a child doesnt have merit to offer constructive criticism is absurd. i, as an observer, watch the habits of my friends and their children and i KNOW what they can do make a postive change. but that takes effort. and some parents find it easier to appease the child rather then to make the effort. sad, but true...

strapple

I kind of think that because they're family, you have a right, and nearly a responsibility, to say something, I just don't know how you would go about that without it blowing up in your face. Maybe if more people had things like this pointed out to them to simply make them think and reconsider, they might make better choices. I dunno, in our country (U.S.), the whole "it takes a village" doesn't really apply. Of course people can make their own choices, but we are talking about basic nutrition for an infant. Wish I could offer some helpful advice.

yes this is the dilemma im feeling

her daughter is my niece and i love her so i dont want to see her obese or addicted to bad foods

but i dont want to offend my new family. :{

strapple

i as well, am not a parent, so often are my opinions mocked. HOWEVER, a child follows examples, and if the example is an apple vs. a candy bar and the child sees the parent eating a candy bar, 9 times out of 10 they will go with whatever the parent is eating. so for a parent to say that someone without a child doesnt have merit to offer constructive criticism is absurd. i, as an observer, watch the habits of my friends and their children and i KNOW what they can do make a postive change. but that takes effort. and some parents find it easier to appease the child rather then to make the effort. sad, but true...

honestly when it comes to things like this, i feel that not being a parent gives us an advantage because we have no emotional bias when it comes to food. we know the facts, 'a child should not consume this' vs them who have this bond and all they see is 'the child wants what i am eating'

:{ his whole family needs a health makeover but sadly i dont think i can say anything because im new and i dont want to step on any toes

significance

There's probably nothing you can do about it and it is probably best left alone. But if you feel compelled to (and I understand why you might be), one approach might be to buy a book such as "The CSIRO Wellbeing Plan for Kids" (http://www.csiro.au/science/WellbeingForKids.html) as a gift. Don't refer to the problem directly when you give it. If you have kids, say that you found it full of useful advice yourself, so you thought she might like it, too. If you don't have kids, either say something that doesn't sound pointed about how you thought it looked like a good book and thought she might like it, or lie and say "I won this in a raffle and obviously I can't use it, but I thought you might like it."

katiepie111

i have a 2 1/2 year old who was eating alot of fruit and veges before 1. after i split up with my partner, i got lazy, therefore he lost the taste for fruits and vegetables. hes a big (stocky and tall) boy but not fat, and still likes his fruits and vegetables, but only white fruit and veges, such as potatos, cauliflower, bananas, apples. oh and oranges. This isnt uncommon though but i really wish i had tried a little harder as now he is used to quite bland tastes.
HOWEVER it is hard to judge other parents when you dont have kids yourself - i guess unless you saw them everyday and saw they were giving junk everyday. tantrums and all happen if you give a child kinds of food, along with them throwing it on the floor, refusing to eat etc. not saying it is right but sometimes youve had such a long day and dont want the arguments/tantrums that you will make them something they will eat such as a toastie or fish fingers. as i said before, easy to say something when you dont have kids, wait until you have them

suzycreamcheese

if you say anything all you will do is piss them off. It wont change their eating habits, it will just make them think youre sanctimonious and patronising.

Its a lose/lose situation

When you have your own children, then youll be able to control what they eat, but in the meantime, youve got no say, even if its hard to watch.

zorbaru

my youngest is 5months old now and is only JUST starting on pureed fruit. other than that he is still breast feeding.