Bummed out and needing to vent.

KayaSamantha

I am now half way to my goal weight and I have, as of this Monday's weigh in I have beaten the plateau I was stuck on for the past 6.5 weeks so I should be happy right? However I am now more self conscious than ever about myself as more people notice I;m losing weight and getting healthy I feel like there is more pressure than ever to stay on track (it doesn't help that my boyfriend who is also making this lifestyle change seems to "treat" himself all the time behind my back (I find the wrappers in the truck) and whenever I want to treat myself (once every 10 days and I fit it into my targets for the day!) I get the third degree from him!). He is also getting increasingly busy with work and has been trying to get an alumni group set up with a girl from his class. I am so self conscious now that I keep thinking about things that probably wouldn't happen (i.e. her crossing the "colleague" boundary and him brushing it off). I have never felt this low and when I try to talk to my boyfriend about my insecurities he doesn't get it and brushes me off. We live together and are very committed to each other so I know he would never do anything to compromise "us" but my overactive imagination goes crazy every time they are together (as in right now when they had to carpool in his truck up island for dinner to discuss the alumni group and he is now 2 hours late coming home because they are "having a really great chat and catching up"). I'm bummed even more because he promise to grab groceries on his way home so I can have some meals for work tomorrow and he now is too late (the stores are closed) and hasn't even left yet (they are 2 hours away from where we live).
Thanks for reading and letting me vent.
Good luck with everyone's journeys!

methetree

Chin up, he is coming home to you, which matters.

But sucky he isn't going to get you food...

You have made it this far and stick to your plan... when he "treats" he is only cheating himself....

Don't let him brush you off if you are seriously having issues though. It's important to talk about it with him.
If he truly is committed to you, he should be willing to sit down and listen...

just sayin.

feel better

fh1951

About the only thing in life we really control is our own attitude.

kmhamilton6

kay a


I know we only met each other in virtual life but you mean a lot to me. You are the first person that said a word to me as I started a new lifestyle for myself. I think you are incredible and such a genuine spirit. I know that but I want you to know that for yourself....

Although it is very important to speak with your boyfriend about what is bothering you. Whatever you need to do to make that possible I say do.....but I would take extreme measures if needed. Like if we were having sex and to just stop him mid stroke. Lol. Ok but anyway

Keep that head held high look in the mirror and. damnit. I am doing something positive in my life and I am doing it for me!


You will always in my mind and heart as I continue to lean and grow!

trilikeagirl

Trust your gut. He might be a great guy. But he's blowing off your concerns about his friend, not keeping his word when he says he'll do something, and playing weight-loss police. None of those things are ok, and could be red flags. You are worth someone who makes your needs and feelings a priority.

Papillon22

Maybe it'd be a good idea to think about why this is happening now.

Some of us have a fear of succeeding, and struggle with who we'll be/what we'll do when we're done losing weight. Could that be the case? could it be that the fear of all this makes you focus on other things instead of the goal? If that's the case, try to remember that you're doing this for yourself, and stay strong with that idea. The rest is just the landscape you're passing by.

I like the image of having those things that we put on horses' heads (I don't know the name in english) so they don't see the sides. Those things allow you to only look ahead, at your goal

Just my two cents. You can do this!

DaniellePF

He needs to be supportive of your efforts and encouraging if you are taking a well deserved treat. Maybe keep one of those wrappers around and hand it to him next time you get the third degree--lol...no that would be petty...just fun to think about. :-) Your fitness goals are for you right? Just focus on that and do it all for you--he will either fall in line or not.

You should be proud of all you have accomplished so far--good for you!

wildkatt7

In the weight loss journey there is a psychological effect... big time effect. Support is essential. And while your significant other can be a good source of that.. sometimes you need others... I have a group of friends... we help each other... and it is good for our psyches... I am 1/3 of the way to my goal, and boy to I know that one... Keep up the great work and don't be afraid to be honest with your boyfriend about how you are feeling. A secure relationship will survive it all. have faith in your knowledge that it is indeed secure.
blessings