I ate my emotions yesterday!

Sweet_Pandora

I thought I had come so far, I thought that all of the years of experience with healthy eating and starting over again I had a grip on my emotional eating.

Looking at my food diary from yesterday I guess it could of been alot worse. The one thing I did avoid was fast food and junk food.

I've had some emotional stress at home this week stemming from my mother in law, well actually the thought of dinner this evening with my in-laws has been stressing me out the past few days. I have discussed it with my spouse and he knows how anxious I get when it comes to his family. Last night I found myself going home to the house all to myself; a rarity.

Driving home I was planning my binge, was it going to be pizza or fried chicken and french fries, no onion rings....mmmmm.....onion rings or should I just stop and pick up a nice chocolatey indulgence.

I had the self pep talk, I'm doing so good, don't let my stress take over, don't give my mother in law the power over me. I even ran my hand over my belly noticing that it wasn't so bloated and glanced over at my gym bag reminding myself of the great workout I had at lunch.

I made it home, decided on the leftover curried chicken and squash until I reached the kitchen. I scoured the cupboard for a can of mushroom soup and some pasta. I boiled the pasta, of course it was whole wheat and counted out 10 of my daughters Crispers and ate them while I waited impatiently along with a piece of swiss cheese. Once the pasta was cooked I poured the whole can of mushroom soup over it, mixed and sprinkled with parmesan cheese. I went to the bar fridge and grabbed a can of coke. I can't tell you the last time I drank a diet soda let alone a non diet soda. I then proceeded to the family room, turned on the t.v. and sat down and ate my dinner. Eating in the family room is a no no in our house. All meals are eaten at a table. But hey I was rebelling I was showing them (who exactly I'm not sure but take that) I'm eating foods that are of little nutritional value and certainly not the norm. I woofed it down and made my way back to the kitchen, what else. What else can I eat, I need something sweet, I went to the baking cupboard a little dark chocolate would do the trick. What I found was a 6.8 oz Hershey chocolate and almond bar. I broke off 4 squares and ate them, again in the family room. Not satisfied I returned and continued to eat half of the huge bar.

I went back to the couch, laid down and proceeded to fall asleep watching t.v. When I woke what did I do, returned to the kitchen said WTF and proceeded to eat the remainder of the chocolate bar. It was my daughters chocolate bar from her Aunt who had been to Hershey, Pennsylvania. I have some explaining to do this evening when she gets home.

WOW, what did I do. I sat on the couch, disgusted with myself, angry with myself and tried to figure out what my payoff was for overeating like that.

This morning I am trying to listen to all the advise I give to others, move forward, don't look behind, it was 1 day, today is a fresh start........

I'm a still trying to figure out what I was out to accomplish. I only hurt myself.

This evening we go to dinner with all the in-laws, I'm not worried about the choices I will make tonight, I don't have difficulty making healthy choices or portion control when I am not alone.

How do I deal with emotional eating? Any suggestions what I can do to deal with emotional situations without turning to food. Talking it out didn't seem to help.

K

Melissajojo3

sometimes it will happend when you want to enjoy something you used to eat and is not good for you, and thats ok but just watch your portion size. For example I eat Pizza every 1 or twice a month but I only eat 2 or 3 slices with lots and lots of water. If cheating when your emotional try chewing gum or go for a walk, get your mind distracted and just think about all you have done to get where you are today.. dont worry the key word is never give up!! ... Good luck in this journey

moushtie

You sound like you were in high anxiety mode. I find I need to do something to keep myself occupied in those times. Of course there's the usual hobbies, tv, but when I'm wound up I can't focus on those. I would go for loud music, or any music you like to sing along to. Also consider taking a pillow or cushion and taking all your nervous energy out on it. When you're home alone there's no one to see! If you get to the point you feel like crying, grab the pillow and cushion and hug it tight, like you're hugging yourself.

Don't know if any of this will work for you, just some ideas that have worked for me. It's not my in-laws that freak me out, it's my own mother...

amyhoss

I have done the same so many times over and I know exactly what you are talking about. There are sooo many reasons why you shouldn't, but those still are not enough. I feel your pain as I am also an emotional eater.

wickedcricket

well for one thing, stop beating yourself up. It's a rarity, not the norm, you were still health conscious; not like you lost your mind and ate your dog or something.
My suggestion, ESP if you're home alone like that is GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! go out, take about $5 with you, enough for mad money but not much of a binge. Get out, even if you only walk - walk it out - cuss at the sky - cry if you want to but put distance between you and the pantry until you can get your emotions under control.
Alternatively, if you have a good friend who's house you can go to or she'll come to yours. Play cards or something with your hands instead of eating ...
You're fine and having emotions is nothing to be emotional about (lol) we are emotional beings. You're only human, forgive yourself.
Have a wondeful holiday!

MsFitnFabulous

Sorry to hear you had a rough day. My suggestions would be to talk more in depth with your husband to see whether or not you and your in-laws can come to a truce.

Or take a nice long walk to think about ways to handle the situation in ways that work for you. Walking usually helps to clear your head.


Lastly, try yoga. I recently tried it thinking it would be bogus. But I have grown very fond of it!!!

monocot

it's very tough. Everyone says chewing gum, or working our/walking. But I find doing any of it. I'm still thinking of the food. It never leaves my mind. After a great workout in attempt to get rid emotional eating. I still go straight to the fridge...
For a while I used to Go for a drive, LEave my wallet on purpose. and drive along the back roads and sing along to Music. It didnt really help much. Talking it out does help, I don't actually have anyone to call.but if you do, Call your best friend and talk about your problem, and talk about the best memories.

danielle2021

I eat my emotions as well. I go right for the carbs and chocolate as well. Its what we were programmed to do. Instead of beating yourself up over this time held tradition, look at the positive, you know one of the triggers, you know what you will eat and you have identified that it was emotional eating. Now you have to figure out a new way to deal with that habit and know that we aren't always going to be successful in beating the habit.

I find that going to the gym helps (sometimes I end up going 3 times day depending on how annoyed or stressed I am and if i have the time) other times, I take that energy and paint,crochet (sic), write in my journal or just hop on facebook and vent with a friend via chat. I will admit it took a while for these techniques to give me the same result as eating, but in the end I didn't have the guilt I feel after I binge Maybe look into finding an OA meeting in your area and from time to time join a group session. Know that sometimes you will fall back into an old habit.

juliebethswag

i loved wickedcricket's response to you, Kazzy! also i would add regarding your experience, you are not alone! everyone but especially women can become prone to coping with stress by turning to fats and sweets. that's why i appreciated the advice given to you to get distance from those temptations while giving yourself a chance to face and express those emotions differently (a walk, letting yourself cry, talking with a friend, maybe journaling or dancing sometimes work for me). but please, please, please know you are not alone and know that we are not defined by those moments when we lose touch with ourselves. we are defined by the moments when we are most at peace with ourselves. so be defined not by your mistake last night but by an attitude of patience, kindness, and mercy toward the beautiful spirit you are!

Sweet_Pandora

Thank you all for your advices and kind words.

I made it through the evening and I know my spouse appreciates the effort I put in to do the right thing and rise above his mothers passive aggressive behaviour towards me.

The wine was flowing, the food was delicious and the company well...... the dinner was lovely! ;p

I realize that I allowed myself to get stressed out which lead to my little pity party binge but it is behind me and I don't have to see them again until Thanksgiving! I'm a little better equipped for next time.

K