DH Isn't HELPING! *** VENT ***

mhosner

I am going to start by saying don't get me wrong I love my husband but sometimes.... I don't think he understands that it's much harder for me to lose weight then him. I can completely relate to the slim-quick commercial. He cuts out pop and loses 10 pounds - I cut out pop and gain - he works out in the morning for 30 minutes and loses 10 pounds - I workout harder and longer and lose nothing. So when I ask him to help me find and make smart food choices he says he doesn't need to diet he is losing enough weight without it. So why is it that he doesn't understand that I need to and I need his support. I can't do it alone. I can't eat blame chicken breast and veggies while they are eating pizza and ice cream - I have no well power. I would rather just not have it in the house. ERRG I tried talking to him and for like 2 days he seems to help and understand and then right back to same old habits. Has anyone had someone come into the home and sit down with both of you and put together a plan and show you how to cook it? I think if he learned how to cook a couple healthy things that he was proud of he would want to help me out more and would enjoy doing it. I am the primary cook. And right now I make my dinner, then make his/kids dinner.

mhosner

I am going to start by saying don't get me wrong I love my husband but sometimes.... I don't think he understands that it's much harder for me to lose weight then him. I can completely relate to the slim-quick commercial. He cuts out pop and loses 10 pounds - I cut out pop and gain - he works out in the morning for 30 minutes and loses 10 pounds - I workout harder and longer and lose nothing. So when I ask him to help me find and make smart food choices he says he doesn't need to diet he is losing enough weight without it. So why is it that he doesn't understand that I need to and I need his support. I can't do it alone. I can't eat blame chicken breast and veggies while they are eating pizza and ice cream - I have no well power. I would rather just not have it in the house. ERRG I tried talking to him and for like 2 days he seems to help and understand and then right back to same old habits. Has anyone had someone come into the home and sit down with both of you and put together a plan and show you how to cook it? I think if he learned how to cook a couple healthy things that he was proud of he would want to help me out more and would enjoy doing it. I am the primary cook. And right now I make my dinner, then make his/kids dinner.

brookefoley

I'm sorry you're having a hard time with him!! Maybe you should make the dinner YOU want to eat and then if he wants something different, he can make it himself. Make yourself the priority!!
Unfortunately I think men sometimes have a better metabolism than we do!
Keep up the great work!

Brooke

renae77

I'm sorry you're having a hard time with him!! Maybe you should make the dinner YOU want to eat and then if he wants something different, he can make it himself. Make yourself the priority!!
Unfortunately I think men sometimes have a better metabolism than we do!
Keep up the great work!

Brooke

Amen Brooke! That's what I do here! My hubby is trying to eat better too but I find it is easier sometimes to make me something and let him fend for himself and that works out great! That way I don't crave what he is eating!

mhosner

Good suggestions ladies. Thanks!

Jackie_W

My family eat whatever I cook, if they don't like it, they can make their own - it's as simple as that - I won't run myself ragged to cook a unhealthy meal that I would crave, and not be satisfied until I ate!

It was hard at first, and we had a few arguments - my family told me I was being selfish !!!!! :noway:
So I pointed out the obvious, that I refuse to slowly kill myself just so they can have pizza or burgers every night, if they have so little respect for their own lives, then they have to cook the food themselves, I won't participate in something that will slowly kill them.

Worked for me hun :bigsmile: :flowerforyou:

mhosner

What do you guys do with children who know unhealthy cooking and getting them to eat new foods that aren't nuggets, pizza, mac and cheese, hot dogs, etc.. My kids are 2, 4, 7 and they are use to bad foods.

zoepane

I agree, cook one meal, make it healthy, if he doesn't like it, oh well......
My DH has agreed to WW meals for a month to give me a jump start, but he will eat anything as long as he doesn't have to cook it, you may have to have a heart to heart with your DH, I did, my DH loves me the way I am, but I'm not happy or healthy....
So he understands more, he wants me around longer
hope he comes around soon

Teachtheplanet2009

Well, you'll have to start them off slowly.
How about mac and cheese with spinach mixed in? Turkey or veggie burgers and (baked) yam fries? Homemade pizza! Some stores even have the dough ready made.

lindsayledford

I agree with everybody else. I would even take it a step further and tell your kids if they don't eat what you make, you'll "send them to bed without supper" like in the 1940's. It will be healthier for them in the long run. My Mom can eat whatever she wants and not gain a pound. I used to think I was like that till I hit 24 and it turns out, I was wrong. It's better to learn young.

And for the husband, I'd consider asking if the situation were that you were smokers and you were trying to quit, wouldn't he want to be supportive and not smoke around you? If he says no, hit him or something--if he says yes, point out the health risks of a poor diet and make him realize his lack of support is hurting you.

Good luck and stay strong--I understand--my live in boyfriend eats Nachos at three in the morning all the time! that's why we women have to stick together!

sixtyinchesoffury

I agree. I had to bring together a very picky 5 year old, a semi picky 36dyear old and myself starting to eat healthy and struggling between being veggie or going back to meat ( i went back it helps keep the peace). You jus have to do a little googling but it's possible to please everyone. I try to make at least one meal per person per week that they really want. I just make it a healthier version.

Good luck:drinker:

chrissypoo

no time like the present to change things!!

amunet07

I agree with everybody else. I would even take it a step further and tell your kids if they don't eat what you make, you'll "send them to bed without supper" like in the 1940's. It will be healthier for them in the long run. My Mom can eat whatever she wants and not gain a pound. I used to think I was like that till I hit 24 and it turns out, I was wrong. It's better to learn young.

And for the husband, I'd consider asking if the situation were that you were smokers and you were trying to quit, wouldn't he want to be supportive and not smoke around you? If he says no, hit him or something--if he says yes, point out the health risks of a poor diet and make him realize his lack of support is hurting you.

Good luck and stay strong--I understand--my live in boyfriend eats Nachos at three in the morning all the time! that's why we women have to stick together!

My live in boyfriend is the same way! But there is one advantage. If you oops and order a meal at a restaurant that ends up being your daily calories worth in one meal and you had boxed up half and took it home before you new this... He will sacrafice himself and eat the other half so I'm not tempted!:laugh:

Hannah_Banana

Completely understand, m'dear. :bigsmile:

DH LOVES my cooking. He will do anything I ask if I promise to make a dinner he likes. So we worked it like this. I cook for myself, if he wants to eat what I'm eating, he can. If not, he can go make himself something. He has taken to going to Trader Joe's and stocking up on their mini pizzas and orange chicken. :laugh:

Sometimes he eats with me, sometimes he has pizza. We don't sit down and eat together (we don't even have a dining table) so I don't have to watch him eat. :flowerforyou:

smalltownsquarepeg

There's a new Biggest Loser FAMILY Cookbook out...I was thinking of buying it. I have four kids, two of which are pretty picky eaters. One of my resolutions for the new year was to try one new recipe a week, also! You'll never know what they're going to eat until you start putting it in front of them!! The key is to make sure if you're trying something new...like meatloaf made with ground turkey...make a side dish you know they love...then you won't be starving anyone!!

HTH!
Tara

TRLTAMPA

I cook what I cook. They always trade back and forth and make it work. I don't care if they leave something on their plate, but they KNOW better than to complain about what's in front of them.
But I'm not always the one cooking. Hubby was dificult at first because he wasn't taking me seriously. After my first weigh in and I had dropped 6 pounds, then he started to pitch in. Now he's more conscious of his cooking decisions. He's very supportive of my ideas and recipe quriks. He's even my willpower at times....like last night when the kids had pizza and I soooo wanted a tiny tiny slice at like 9 o clock last night. But he said No and I snapped out of it.

lpadilla75

What do you guys do with children who know unhealthy cooking and getting them to eat new foods that aren't nuggets, pizza, mac and cheese, hot dogs, etc.. My kids are 2, 4, 7 and they are use to bad foods.

You can make your own heathy versions of nuggets, pizza and mac and cheese. IMHO, you are going to have to find some willpower, unless you never plan on leaving your house there are tempations everywhere.

Fitness_Chick

What do you guys do with children who know unhealthy cooking and getting them to eat new foods that aren't nuggets, pizza, mac and cheese, hot dogs, etc.. My kids are 2, 4, 7 and they are use to bad foods.

You can make your own heathy versions of nuggets, pizza and mac and cheese. IMHO, you are going to have to find some willpower, unless you never plan on leaving your house there are tempations everywhere.

very good point...I agree.. there will always be TV commercials, fast food places to drive by, store ads, old cravings, well getting a proper mind set and sticking to it no matter what!!! That is how we become successful at any change we need/want to make for ourselves.

Some folks will never understand, we can't make them, they are entitled to make their own choices just as we are... but perhaps if educated better they will truly understand this isn't just something that tastes better but food that will nourish our body and help us live healthy and longer lives.

Someone mentioned the BL cookbook, or how about crockpot meals..that way you can set it up the night before put it in the fridge and turn it on in the morning before leaving for work. Lots of healthy, fun and great recipes to be had from the crockpot.

Kids need healthy guidance on what is right and wrong, healthy food will make them grow up knowing that healthier choices are better. We all adjust even some on here that are confessed fast food eaters that have never in their lives eaten any veggies or fruit.

If we can do it surely a 2, 4 and 7 year old child can be taught to enjoy healthier versions. HG as well as many other healthy eating cooking sites have some great chicken nugget recipes, healthier mac an cheese, how about some steamed broccoli with a healthier cheese drizzled over it. Kids adapt. What about many on here that have eaten junk for 20-40 years? They are adapting, we are responsible to teach our children the right way when they are young so they know what is right and wrong surely food fits in among that?

You hubby? Well, kindness and understanding of how difficult it is to change habits in the beginning might help him out... someone shared sitting down and talking it out with him. Finding what his favorite food are and incorporating them in healthy ways can go along ways in saving squabbles.

mommachag

i have a bunch of kids and thankfully they eat pretty well. in my house the rule has always been 'YOU DONT HAVE TO LIKE IT, YOU JUST HAVE TO EAT IT"hehe. there are exceptions. i have always cooked pretty healthy with lots of veggies and fruits so they are use to it.
my x husband was very overweight as a kid so i've been honest with the older ones that they have to be careful what they eat and make healthy choices. when my new hubby came on board I told him the "rules" and explained that our eating habits shape theirs and i want them to be healthy. so he's been ok...except for his ice cream addiction

MissGorgeous

if your the main cook in the house
its up to you
dont buy foods you cant eat
when i changed my lifestyle my husband and kids did also
(was married at the time)
i do the shopping and cooking
so they eat what i make or do not eat at all
everything in my house is mostly raw foods and organic
i know it must be hard with the lack of support
but dont buy that kind of food for your family!

goochinator

Maybe you should make the dinner YOU want to eat and then if he wants something different, he can make it himself. Make yourself the priority!!
Unfortunately I think men sometimes have a better metabolism than we do!
Keep up the great work!

Brooke

I havent read all the responses yet, but that's what I do too...I cook myself something great and yummy and he can eat whatever frozen garbage he has. As for not keeping junk in the house, what if you were to ask him to keep it out of sight?
Once in a great while I'll make some random healthy dish and that's dinner for both- he usually likes it, but then will eat massive amounts fo snacks/cereal/etc afterwards.

kammiller

It can be a challenge but it is a real challenge that we have to face when we walk out our doors. I am sure strangers are not gonna stop eating pizza in front of us or corn dogs we have to learn to say no when we have pizza I have one slice and a salad " a big salad". It seems to work because I feel like I am still getting a treat too. Or another suggestion cook pr order your special food on your day off.

MissGorgeous

What do you guys do with children who know unhealthy cooking and getting them to eat new foods that aren't nuggets, pizza, mac and cheese, hot dogs, etc.. My kids are 2, 4, 7 and they are use to bad foods.

just remove the food and replace with healthy????
you cant give it to them if its not in the house right? haha
maybe weekly if they are good reward them with a treat meal!


i have three year and 13months and 1.5months
(chick fil a & inn n out are the only fast foods i allow IF he will eat it)
three year old wont eat ice cream or cookies or bread or pasta or cereal or rice or anything most kids will
he will eat yougart cottage cheese fruit and veggies and if we are lucky he will eat chicken but not on a bone and not nuggets has to be grilled or baked
we have to make him protien shakes everyday to make sure he eats enough because he is just way too pickey for his own good!

mommachag

What do you guys do with children who know unhealthy cooking and getting them to eat new foods that aren't nuggets, pizza, mac and cheese, hot dogs, etc.. My kids are 2, 4, 7 and they are use to bad foods.

just like a lot of people here, maybe try replacing one or two things at a time? make a list of all the not healthy foods you buy. write each one on a note card.
made a list of healthy alternatives write them on a different color note card. each week when you do the shopping list have the kids each pick one unhealthy thing they are willing to give up and let them choose an alternative that is healthy. maybe you can reward the kids when you get all the unheathy things out by allowing them "treats" of there 2 favorites every so often. but not untill all the junk is gone?

it might work and be fun too:bigsmile: