Okay so I am a bit Confused

heidithompson78

So last night as a source of inspiration I went on MFP to attempt to see the success of others and gain a bit of encouragement for myself as I have a long long road ahead of me. Lets face it I could stand to loose almost two hundred pounds. While reading I came across a blog stating the secret of my success. Excited I quickly opened the blog to read a rant, yes as I am doing now but hear me out, about there is no real secrete to success its just diet and exercise and that they are sick of hearing excuses as to why people are fat. To me it felt like they were saying that if you are fat you are lazy and unmotivated. Well I am hear to say that this may not always be the case. I grew up in a home with my mother and grandmother. My mother did not know how to cook, and my grandmother, well she was dying and could not cook. For me food was always the reward for a job well done, and I was taught that when you are happy you eat and when you are sad you eat. I was never taught what types of food make you fat and what you should and should not eat. Infact when I wanted to buy fruits my mom would tell me that it was to much money and to go pick out a piece of candy. Fast food, well its what I grew up on, It was what we ate for breakfast, lunch and supper. As I got older, I attempted many different types of diets, in an attempt to loose weight, and times was successful, however, I always gained the weight back and more. I gave up, got married, and had a baby, boy did the weight come on after having a baby, my days of dancing the night away were gone, and the weight built up. I again attempted to diet, and lost almost 100lbs using slim fast, yes slim fast works well, however, the minuet I went off the shakes I gained the weight back. Imagine my despair after almost a year of starving myself all my hard work was fading and honestly I had no clue how to stop it. I am at the point that I really truly want a change; I don’t want to raise a fat kid. My daughter is seven, and is within the BMI for her body, however she is teetering on the high-end of a normal weight. In speaking with my sister today she told me to just give up its genetic and no matter what I did my kid would be fat, and I will be fat the rest of my life. I refuse to take that answer; I refuse to believe that I am powerless. Two weeks ago I found MFP and have found it shocking that the foods I thought would be a good choice for me, really are horrible! I went to 99 with my hubby on a date and attempting to stay on plan looked up almost every meal and it was almost 1500 calories that is most of my 2000 calories that MFP says I should be getting in a day! I looked up Wendy’s, which was right next door and found that I would be better getting a double cheeseburger and a small fry then eating at 99. I can take blame for letting myself get this far out of control; however, I was never shown another way. I was never shown to count calories, or fat grams, I was never told what were good food choices and what were bad, and in my family we were not allowed to talk about it. I love MFP and alot of the people on here have gotten really good results, and this seems like a positive place to start, as it can help guide me to what I should and should not be making for food choices, however, I also have seen people on here who forget what it is like from the starting line. I am at the starting line, I have lost three pounds in two weeks, and you know what it may not seems like much, but I did it, and I did it healthy. I think that I can maintain what I am doing for life; however, I just wanted to share my feelings, because I am sure that I am not the only one out here at the starting line. May of you are in the race, please don’t forget what it is like to start, please don’t loose compassion for others; we need your help and your inspiration.

GypsysBlood

Congratulations on taking charge! Also congrats on being a good Mom and wanting to make changes for yourself and your daughter! I am at the starting line also and I have seen the finish line before only to fall back. I joined MFP about 2 weeks ago and have lost 8 lbs. The beginning is tough but totally worth it. Good Luck!

lynnspittal

I dont have any great words of wisdom for you sadly, but I do want to say that I think you have turned the right corner! The good thing is, you are not powerless and it's great that you refused to accept that. Also if you are surrounded by folk who haven't managed to start the journey, be careful that they don't try to sabotage you. You will seem like a threat to them. MFP is a brilliant help, I've certainly found that and the people are usually very supportive. Friend some people who have like minded approaches and you will get there for certain. I wish you all the luck in the world. You have made the right move here for sure! Lynn S

lynnspittal

whoops

supertracylynn

Looks like you've had your turning point and your wake up call.

Congrats on your weight loss thus far and here's to the rest of those pounds falling away!

Just like you implore others to not forget the starting line, don't forget it yourself. You say you "think" you can maintain this for life. Determine inside yourself that you Will.

Reach for the moon, even if you fall short, you'll land among the stars.

supertracylynn

:flowerforyou:

Scarletblue

So very true.

Congrates to you for taking charge and doing it the right way.

beautyonhold

i congratulate you on wanting to make a change, and i think if you really want this, you're going to achieve it. I have also struggled with weight most of my life. Never give up, because good things come to people that try. It won't be easy, in fact it's going to be difficult. But every pound lost is a great accomplishment, and you should feel very proud. I wish you the best of success on your journey, and i just wanted to let you know that you're very inspiring.

Chuck417

Well said! If put yourself into the place of accountability to someone other than just yourself you will be more successful. There are alot of people on this site who have done tremendously well. Message them and ask questions. Get books on proper nutrition to get a feel for what foods are better than others. Lastly, have you had a medical check-up? That may be a great place to start as the Dr. may be able to help you with some programs which may work well for you.

You can do this!! You're doing it! Way to take the first step and reach out. You may find negative posts here and there. Ignore them. There is alot of encouragement coming your way! Blessing on you and your journey. And congrats on the 3 pounds.
Chuck

M155AUS

There is no secret to weight loss, eat less calories, burn more off than you are using. However, if you don't have the educuation, especially from a young age, then you will never know. People do not realise just how much your childhood does shape you. I'm probably 20lbs bigger than I should be, but I have never had anymore weight to lose than that so I can't pretend to know what it's like to have 200lbs to lose. My mother's favourite saying when I said I was hungry, was 'have some fruit'. But my parents could always afford to feed me fresh, healthy food, apart from the odd occasion as a treat they would let me have McDonalds or chocolate. I was always jealous of the kids in the playground that got a pack of chips in their lunch, but I know why I didn't have them now, as an adult.

Yes, the secret is obvious, but only if you are educated about the foods you eat. It's not always how much you are eating, but what you are eating.

Good luck with your weight loss, I really hope this works for you. It is an education to me still on the calories and the types of food I eat everyday.

heidithompson78

Thank you guys, and Yes I have had a medical check up and thank the good lord my weight has not yet shown any affects on my health, but yes I know its comming. My doctor has approved me to do almost anything with one exception. I have a broken knee cap and cant bend it all of the way. Exercise has been a challenge for me, and I am attempting to work past it. I am swimming in the pool, as long as the weather hold out (live in Maine) and bought an elipitical, can only do 5 mins but its a start. ill get there just have to stay positive. BTW I spoke with a friend of mine (whos skinny) her advice was to stay on the outside of the grocery store, never go down the middle isles except for cereal, as that is were the bad stuff is kept lol.


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Pebble321

Well done on making the choice to get healthier.
It can seem really confusing to kow what to eat, but don't feel pressured about having to do it all at once.
If you want to, you can pick one thing to change at a time. Maybe you can start by deciding to have a healthy breakfast. Look up some recipe ideas for different kinds of breakfast foods and give them a try. Once you have this under control, then look at lunch, then dinner, then snacks. You get the idea!
And don't get carried away with needing everything to be super low calorie. Remember that food is the fuel that keeps your body running, so you need to get good fuel in there to stay healthy.
You can do it!

heidithompson78

By the way, anyone who would like to be my friend, I would love it

Pinky67

Good luck and well done! You've come to the right place :happy:

mowu

So last night as a source of inspiration I went on MFP to attempt to see the success of others and gain a bit of encouragement for myself as I have a long long road ahead of me. Lets face it I could stand to loose almost two hundred pounds. While reading I came across a blog stating the secret of my success. Excited I quickly opened the blog to read a rant, yes as I am doing now but hear me out, about there is no real secrete to success its just diet and exercise and that they are sick of hearing excuses as to why people are fat. To me it felt like they were saying that if you are fat you are lazy and unmotivated. Well I am hear to say that this may not always be the case.----

I think (well....I hope, can't speak for the blogger but only for myself) that you are reading too much into that rant you read. What I think you should take with you from the blog is this:

There are no miracle cure to weight loss. Most of the "slimming"-products are made by companies whose primary goal is to make money. So while they may be a good supplement while while working on finding a good sustainable diet and getting into exercising, they are not a lasting solution (which you experienced yourself with you Slim-fast diet).

The best sustainable solution is to find a way to control your diet in a healthy fashion and exercising - and it seems to me from what you write you have realized exactly that since you are acknowledging that putting together a healthy sustainable diet was not taught to you when growing up - so you have to learn now that you have grown up and know better than what you were taught.

With regards to the excuses I don't think you fall into the category the blogger is thinking of - after all you refused to use the excuse that overweight was in your genes. You have accepted that you are in charge of what happens. You are not the innocent victim of something you can't control, and while having started off badly due to things out of your control you are now accepting that you can seize control of the situation.

So I think you should take the blog you read as a pat on the back that you are actually on the right path - you have started your journey and now you "just" have to follow through. And while it will be hard at times, I see plenty of stories on these boards to convince me that it's worth it.

Elleinnz

Congratulations on taking that first step - and how well you are doing.....I most probably commented on the blog you are referring to...... You are dead right - we alll got to where we were for many different reasons, and in my personal case 100% because I was lazy - and ate too much! I know other people have been upset at me on here and think I don't understand other people's challenges - that is totally not true, but for myself until I confronted the real reasons I was fat I was never going to be successful at changing things around...

Now this might not be the case for everyone - but definitely for me......but you know what - I never made excuses for why I could not lose weight, or exercise - I knew what I needed to do as I had done it before - I was just not ready to admit that I needed to change - or as I keep on saying to people I did not want it bad enough!!

The point I tried to make in that blog is that that I see people out there that can do what I am doing - but until they stop making excuses like they don't have time - or they hate the treadmill they will be losing out on the benefits you and I are reaping right now.....

The internet is a very weird place, and because we miss the immediate reaction of someone when something is said - things might sometimes be read different to the way it is intended - please do not let other people's ramblings or rants hurt you - different people have different ways of saying things - with no bad intentions....

Personally I have not forgotten where I have come from - and I know some of the other people that commented on there, and I am reasonably sure neither have they.....

edit : The poster above said it much better than me :-)

heidithompson78

Thank you to everyone who commented