Just whining

therealkittymao

OK, so I am in love with the best man in the world and he honestly doesn't care what size I am, he loves me no matter what. But maybe that's the PROBLEM. He is a GREAT cook, he does it professionally and he loves doing it at home too. I have gained 15 pounds since we started dating two and a half years ago and I thought it was me. My inertia, my lack of ability to control my appetite, etc. So since I started using MFP, I have realized that almost all my calories come from my evening meal (which he prepares). And it's HEAVY. He cooks at Texas Roadhouse and so he uses a LOT of oil, butter, sugar... that's just how he's used to cooking. And it's delicious. And I am not strong enough to eat only a little bit.

And the thing is, he LOVES cooking. I am going to feel ****ty asking him to let me cook for myself for a while, but it just HAS to be. FIFTEEN POUNDS.

I cooked for myself tonight and I ate everything I felt like eating all day. And I am 400 calories UNDER my goal. I'm going to need to eat fruit or something for a snack. I just HAVE to make the change.

but I feel really bad.

SergeantSunshine_reused

Try to just have a small portion of it then once in a while :]

piezoeyjune

OK, so I am in love with the best man in the world and he honestly doesn't care what size I am, he loves me no matter what. But maybe that's the PROBLEM. He is a GREAT cook, he does it professionally and he loves doing it at home too. I have gained 15 pounds since we started dating two and a half years ago and I thought it was me. My inertia, my lack of ability to control my appetite, etc. So since I started using MFP, I have realized that almost all my calories come from my evening meal (which he prepares). And it's HEAVY. He cooks at Texas Roadhouse and so he uses a LOT of oil, butter, sugar... that's just how he's used to cooking. And it's delicious. And I am not strong enough to eat only a little bit.

And the thing is, he LOVES cooking. I am going to feel ****ty asking him to let me cook for myself for a while, but it just HAS to be. FIFTEEN POUNDS.

I cooked for myself tonight and I ate everything I felt like eating all day. And I am 400 calories UNDER my goal. I'm going to need to eat fruit or something for a snack. I just HAVE to make the change.

but I feel really bad.

How about offer him sexual favors for those days that you cook so he doesnt obsess over not cooking?
He sounds like a great guy (and I LOVE Texas Roadhouse... Thank God there are none near me; only when I go to Erie PA to visit my dad...)
Good luck.

MochaMixAZ

He's wonderful, he'll understand. Consider framing it as, "*I* don't feel as comfortable and gorgeous as I want to, I need to reduce my calorie intake... do you have any ideas?" Maybe he just needs to be made aware of your struggle. Then you can throw out suggestions, like cooking for yourself... or perhaps him trying to cook with less oils/butter.... maybe challenge him to cook a meal under 500 calories. Appeal to his problem-solving side.

My guy didn't have ANY idea how his eating/cooking habits could influence me until I explained it. He'll never be as food-conscious as I am, but now at least he tries and lets me do my own thing without feeling hurt.

dogwhisperette

Join him when he is cooking and make a really tasty salad for the 2 of you for a starter. You will get the benefits of joining him doing what he loves and keeping yourself on track by filling yourself on salad which will enable you to eat less of the main course. Hope this helps

DoriLuke

Maybe you can still let him cook for you and use major will power and portion control...what a tough situation. My husband is the same, (not a cook but very good at it) - and doesn't care if I lose even 1 more lb). Anytime we do something fun it is centered around food, and I had to take the stand that I can't do those things anymore. We are starting to replace our celebrations with non foodie fun..but its tough. Anyway I hope he understands that his food is just a little too yummy for you right now!

GurleyGirl524

My husband is being super supportive while I am trying to lose, he understands how important it is to me. Maybe if you explain to him how important it is to you to lose this 15 pounds but you LOVE his cooking, maybe just cook lighter, it would be healthier for you both. If he loves to cook for you he should love just as much to cook healthier for you.

trilikeagirl

Join him when he is cooking and make a really tasty salad for the 2 of you for a starter. You will get the benefits of joining him doing what he loves and keeping yourself on track by filling yourself on salad which will enable you to eat less of the main course. Hope this helps

you are a genius!

velvetkat

My BF loves to cook also and had never made anything healthy for us as he likes to cook with butter and whole cream and all those "good" things!
He is lucky and he doesnt gain an ounce and is thin!(Must be nice)
When I decided that i needed to get a grasp on my health and lose weight I decided the only way to do it was to have him on my side.
I challenged him to cook healthy but tasty food for me. He took the challenge and started measuring and weighing everything. I told him what I wanted to eat made sure he had the recipe if there was one and let him create the meal. Well it is now 7 months later and I am 88 lbs lighter and my health is a lot lot better.
He cooks the "good" stuff for himself although he is also sometimes eating what I eat cuz "it tastes good"

I still have 32 lbs to lose but I finally found a way to keep everyone happy and not feel like I was being deprived or depriving anyone else the meal they want.

Maybe you can do something like this for your husband so you dont have to "go it alone"

url=http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker][/url]
Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools

therealkittymao

You all are awesome, thank you so much for the support and the suggestions! I like these message boards! I feel so much better! Feel free to friend me, anybody. I am pretty new to this.