Need support for huge weight loss goal!

birdshoup

Hey everyone! I'm a 30 year old woman who has gained significant weight since the birth of my daughter 4 years ago. At first I attributed to baby weight, but I don't have an excuse anymore. I need to lose approximately 90 pounds to be in a healthy weight bracket for my height. It literally seems impossible to me. I have tried my fitness pal before, weight watchers, no-carb diets, and even followed a diet prescribed by my doctor. I lose about 5 pounds in a month, and I give up. I need support for staying power. My husband has followed my fitness pal and lost 20 pounds. I see him with immediate results, and I become discouraged that I'm not seeing the weight come off for me. Anyone else in a similar situation? Anyone with a huge amount of weight to lose to commiserate with?

Bessfish

I am so with you! My name is Mary Beth and I have atleast 60lbs to go and 80 if I am thinking about when I was young and fit. I am 46, a married mother of two boys 13 and 18. I am a ER RN who works the night shift. Of course that I focus on this and want to do it, I get a cold. My goal this week is to track what I put in my mouth! I do well most of the day but lose control in the evenings when I am off. My diet is mainly carbs with protein so I really need to focus on more veggies and portion control.
I plan to take it a pound at a time, I get overwhelmed by how much I need to lose.
Remember men tend to lose quicker than women, don't give up!
I don't usually interact with people so I am trying to open up, maybe this will help.
Sincerely,
Mary Beth

reese66

You can add me if you like.

EDesq

Hey everyone! I'm a 30 year old woman who has gained significant weight since the birth of my daughter 4 years ago. At first I attributed to baby weight, but I don't have an excuse anymore. I need to lose approximately 90 pounds to be in a healthy weight bracket for my height. It literally seems impossible to me. I have tried my fitness pal before, weight watchers, no-carb diets, and even followed a diet prescribed by my doctor. I lose about 5 pounds in a month, and I give up. I need support for staying power. My husband has followed my fitness pal and lost 20 pounds. I see him with immediate results, and I become discouraged that I'm not seeing the weight come off for me. Anyone else in a similar situation? Anyone with a huge amount of weight to lose to commiserate with?

5 lbs a Month is NO JOKE...That is 60 lbs in a Year! If you would stick with that, BE REASONABLE in your expectations you would make it! Many REASONABLE People give themselves 2-3 years to lose 80-90 lbs. , sticking to a Plan. If you do not set reasonable goals, with Reasonable expectations, you may never succeed.

lunula76

Hi,
I'm about 35 lbs in to a 70 lb weight loss. Nothing has ever worked before for me either.
I think what is making this work now is that I am working really hard not to compare anything I am doing with anyone else. And not getting too down on myself when I don't have a good day. In the past I have really beat myself up when I slip and let it be a reason to give up completely. Not this time.

I think its all about your headspace. I have challenged myself to get to a healthy weight - I have never been a healthy weight before and I want to see what its like. I won't let anyone take that away from me. Not even myself. I am constantly assessing where I am at and if I want something of a high caloric value I had better earn it but I am sticking as close to 1200 a day as I can. It is getting a little easier as I go on but it takes a lot of work and it is often two steps forward one step back.

You can do it, you just need to give yourself the support and encouragement you need.
Happy to help in any way I can

MrsM1ggins

Hi

The mountain I'm climbing is exactly the same size as the one you're standing at the bottom of, I'm just up ahead of you a bit because I started earlier.

I know it looks like a huge number, but it's NOT impossible. Remember - you didn't put the weight on overnight, or in a couple of months - you need to understand that it'll come off slowly as well.

Small steps...just keep on climbing!

brbjmb

Your husband loses weight more readily because (in general) men have more muscle mass - and muscle burns calories best!! Don't forget strength training for yourself as well to build your muscles / tone your body and burn those calories!! Good luck. We are all there with you!! No perfect, but on the journey

catwrangler

Losing weight with kids in the house must be the hardest thing ever, you are all to be congratulated :drinker:

My advice is to join a gym or a Y or a local swimming pool, anything outside the house where you can go and challenge your body. It also clears the mind and makes changes in your body that you never thought could happen. You don't have to do it every day, 3 times a week will work.

Don't expect the scale to move very fast. Some weeks it will not move at all. DON'T STOP EXERCISING and eating right!

Take your measurements TODAY and check them after a few weeks of your new regimen.

YOU CAN DO THIS!

ameyc2002

add me 29 2 kids i still have about 50 pounds to go to be where i want to be.. when i get there it may go lower, but i am only 5'3 so thats alot for how short i am. i had trouble at first but you need to measure as well when scale isnt moving seems like the inches are..

birdshoup

I do well at work when I can control what I take for lunch and snacks. But on the weekends I am totally out of control. I guess I need to remember the serious reasons of why this weight needs to come off. I want to set a good example for my daughter. I will never forgive myself if she ends up like me at my age. Also, I want to be around for her. I can't stay this heavy and expect to live a long life.

lunula76

This is a really good point. Physician guidelines recommend no more than 1-2 lbs weight loss per week. The folks on the biggest loser and shows like that have way more weight to lose than you do and when you are starting at a 150+ weight loss it will come off more easily at the beginning. 5 lbs a month is awesome!

emsibun

Hi there,

I've lost about 86 pounds in the past 13 months - I hit the goal weight I set myself on myfitness pal this week (I wrote a blog about it in case you are interested!).

My youngest child was 4 when I started on this journey and I was in a similar situation to the one you find yourself in now. It's not impossible - believe in yourself.

You CAN do this.

ameyc2002

it helps me to think if i eat like crazy on the weekend i could be undoing all my hard work

Jaded_GRL

When you start to get discouraged over loosing only 3, 5, or 10 pounds GO TO THE GROCERY STORE... go in the veggy section and pick up as many bags of potatos as you have lost in pounds. You only lost 5 pounds? throw that potato sack up on your hip like a baby. See HOW MUCH ROOM it takes up on your body? Now, carry it with you while you shop! Don't put it down. Notice the extra weight now? My mom had lost "Only" ten pounds and was giving up one time so I gave her two 5 pound bags of potatos to carry in the store - it really helps you visualize the weight.
ALSO another idea is to not weigh at all until you have hit 30 days (REALLY HARD to do for most people). If you just make the eating lower calories and being active part of your life and then just HAPPEN to step on a scale in a month the all at once number change will be a big boost to get you thrrough another month. Instead of weighing, put on a pair of pants or a shirt that is a little snug. Use that as your guide, when it fits better you know your doing better. Because a lot of time the numbers on the scale don't move but your body changes shapes and your heart gets stronger.

cmriverside

You can lose that weight - no problem! Go to the "Success Stories" section in the Community. There is story after story of weight loss and health in that section.

You won't do it perfectly at first. Don't be hard on yourself. Like anything, this is a learning process, and you will make mistakes.

Carry on!!

msammerz

I completely understand where you are coming from. I have a similar situation. I have about 100 pounds that I need to lose and I feel like that I have tried everything. I recently starting to go to a weight loss doctor who has prescribed me with weigh loss drugs that have definitely helped me. I also understand where you are coming from with the way you feel about your husbands weight loss. My husband just has to think about losing weight and it will fall off. Let me know if you need anyone to talk to.

momof2osaurus

You can see my ticker! I started with 83 lbs to lose - and it definitely seems completely impossible some days. It helps me a lot if I don't think too much about the ultimate goal and instead focus on what I've done already. It sucks when it slows down/stops/the scale is possessed, but I really feel SO SO much better - and so in control of my eating/health, which I haven't felt in a long time.

Good luck!!

rosied915

Hey Soul Sisters, don't leave me behind!!

My stats are in my signature so you can see I easily had over 80 pounds to lose when I started.

My progress is slow (almost painfully slow) but after a LIFETIME of battling my weight I believe I am approaching this with a much wiser mindset.

I am NOT looking at the WHOLE picture of an 80 boulder to push UPHILL but am choosing to set MINI GOALS to keep me on steady ground.
My first Mini was to get to ONEDERLAND and the 190s.
Now, I'm heading to the 180s. And I'll just keep chipping away at it.

When I get there, I get there. No time limit, no end. Put out the effort, check the results and tweak when necessary.

Good Luck~ MFP is an awesome site and I've learned so much since I've been here~ you will too!

Jaded_GRL

I do well at work when I can control what I take for lunch and snacks. But on the weekends I am totally out of control. I guess I need to remember the serious reasons of why this weight needs to come off. I want to set a good example for my daughter. I will never forgive myself if she ends up like me at my age. Also, I want to be around for her. I can't stay this heavy and expect to live a long life.

Then you can always combine your "out of control" weekends with some out of control exercise. That way you have earned those extra exercise calories to eat. Make it a long family bike ride or walk. Some basketball or volleyball. Indoor walking is good for cold weather seasons. Make a game out of it at the mall with your daughter by making a list of things you will see at the mall and speed walk around the mall tally marking off the stuff on your list.

SailingMike

Some things I have learned...
1. In the first weeks of starting exercise program most folks gain weight because muscle weighs more than fat. SO don't just weigh yourself... MEASURE to see what your body is really doing.
2. NEVER eat less than about 125O calories... OR try to loose too much too fast. Your body goes into starvation mode and retains fat.
3. It took YEARS to put on the weight... eat HEALTHY (food pyramid) exercise regularly... and slowly it will come off.
4. SLOW weight loss is most likely to stay off long term.
5. DON"T "diet"... just learn to eat properly and exercise regularly. Make your goal "good health."
6. Fill out your profile, particpate on these boards, add some friends who encourage you .... and HAVE FUN with it!!
7. Don't deprive yourself. Learn to have just ONE bite of that cake. Total deprivation may lead to fast weight gain later.
8. As you gained weight you probably had plateaus going up. Your body remembers these plateaus and will automatically plateau there again on the way down. Some refer to these as "set points." It may take some time and sometimes some adjustments to get past them.
9. Mix it up. Vary your exercise from day to day and vary your menu. If you get bored you are less likely to be successful.
10. Eat back at least SOME of your exercise calories. This motivates me to exercise more!


"It matters not if we try and fail, and try and fail again. But it matters much if we try and fail and fail to try again."

MissKash

Hello, I'm right there with with having lots to lose and struggling most on the weekends. Feel free to add me if u like. We can support each other.

goodridges

I'm just starting out with a massive 100lb+ to lose. Losing just 5 pounds a month is just right; lose too much and it goes back on almost straight away when you eat "normally" . I think you're very brave to attempt this with kids around, they're exhausting at the best of times! This MFP diary and support is invaluable and we're all here to help you get to your goal which I KNOW you'll do. Keep up the momentum with your hubbie, he's your inspiration that it CAN be done. Good Luck!! ;-}

birdshoup

I can't thank you all enough for the overwhelming support i received immediately! I will definitely add anyone who wants to form a supportive relationship. Day one! Here we go!

Skinny_Kitty

I'm with ya! I am 29 and have gained 60 lbs in the past 7 years... I am now at my all time heaviest and just misrable. My husband and I are over it and want to lose the weight we have gainned however it gets really frustrating as he cuts back 2 days and loses 8 lbs and I gain?!?!?! WTF? So.. I am trying not to pay attention to him and just give it my best and try my hardest. I have slipped and strayed and starting today I am back on the wagon. I have the MFP app on my phone as well and will log everything that I put in my mouth. My best friend is on here and has lost over 80lbs!! She is a true inspiration and she has been working hard at it for over a year. It just shows that even though it takes a little bit of time... with hard work and dedication... it can be done and she looks amazing and is such an inspiration to me!
Together we can do this! I believe that MFP is a great tool to help stay motivated and see your progress. Plus the peoplle on here are so nice and helpful and really help motivate you when you are feeling blue.

Good luck. I know you can do it!!

20dee

I'm also one of those that do great at work, where I take my lunch BUT when I get home and weekends the gloves come off. I have been trying a few new statagies the last few days--

1. I am trying to drink 3 large glasses of water between the time I get home and suppertime. (gets me full and I am not nibbling as I am cooking)

2. After I fix my plate and BEFORE I start eating it -- I put the leftovers away so I won't go back for a second plate.

Hoping this helps me!

Luckiestmomever

You have to start somewhere, right? Good for you for joining! Good luck! I also have a lot to lose, we can do it!

Kambriasgranny

5 pounds a month is so much better than gaining!! I have only lost 4 pounds in the past month...but I know that I must be be consistent and not give up! I have also been on every 'diet' imaginable and I am determined to make this a lifestyle..not a diet. I also know that I must exercise...it is a key part of getting the weight off and keeping it off. Good Luck...add me as a friend and I will do everything possible to keep you motivated!

sk2775

Welcome to MFP. You are taking the right step. I started using MFP 6 1/2 months ago and so far has lost 46 pounds. Why this program has worked for me is that it allows me to keep track of my calories in and also log in my exercise. Also the wonderful supportive network at MFP has kept me going on days when I didn't really want to exercise or eat healthy. So, this is a great program to be in. I have always been overweight but I have never really tried any diets to lose weight. I was and still am very happy with my life...but 6 1/2 months ago, I finally decided that I wanted to be healthy and not be out of breath while climbing stairs etc....so once you put in your mind that you are ready for a change and is ready to lose that weight, you will do it.
Good luck on your journey and feel free to add me as a friend. We are all here to support you through this journey :-)

cantjustcant

Great first step! Welcome! This is a great support base for loss! Someone else said set mini goals. Break it down into decades and it's easier to keep focus on that rather than the big picture...I also give myself rewards at each mini goal...the first was a new haircut and my next (1.6 pounds to go) is that adorable bedding set for my bed! Add me if you would like!

ohhh if you have smart phone you can download the app! That helps when you are away from computer to add food to diary! I add it BEFORE I eat it. A lot of times when I see what it is going to do for my calories I change my mind!

StarGeezer

Welcome! Feel free to add me. Yes, i have a huge amount to lose... lost 50+ so far, but have a long, long way to go. I'm just taking it one day at a time and have committed to see it through to the end.

Stay positive!

Jsoroka

I a Steelers fan looking up the weight loss mountain. I am in it with you! We can do it.