what to do?

wannabeeskinny

I am an emotional eater
there,,I said it
Im in a HORRID marriage(yes Im getting out but stuck there for the present)
im not going to be a coward and blame him for my weight gain but I will say that the way I am treated,,etc the stress,,,,all led to my grabbing the cheese nips,,,etc
that being said
the weight and the man both must go
double doozy innit?
He still yellls,,,loses temper,,,etc all of that
any helps on what to do when this happens so i DONT grab the cheese and crackers?>
I do realise i need to leave and I am.I just need an in between manner to help cope until I am actually walking

wannabeeskinny

I am an emotional eater
there,,I said it
Im in a HORRID marriage(yes Im getting out but stuck there for the present)
im not going to be a coward and blame him for my weight gain but I will say that the way I am treated,,etc the stress,,,,all led to my grabbing the cheese nips,,,etc
that being said
the weight and the man both must go
double doozy innit?
He still yellls,,,loses temper,,,etc all of that
any helps on what to do when this happens so i DONT grab the cheese and crackers?>
I do realise i need to leave and I am.I just need an in between manner to help cope until I am actually walking

TRLTAMPA

grab some baked chips instead..........

annhjk

is going for a walk an option? Read a book (I've a got a couple good romance ones to read).

TRLTAMPA

before i got out of my horrible first marriage, walking was not an option, so im thinking it probly isn't in this case either....could be wrong

wannabeeskinny

not so much whilst he is rambling
a walk afterwards...
sometimes just getting it off my chest could help I hope
baked chips



mmmmmm,,,,some nice salsa too

metco89

I would get out now no matter what. Go to a homeless shelter, they will help you find housing and safety. how do i know?? i did it. don't wait cause it will only get worse. i am also an emotional eater. I now live by myself and am getting back on track. It is taking some work but I am in a peaceful non threatening environment and working on me, from the inside out and i feel like a new journey is beginning and i am starting to feel grateful again. One of the things i did was to journal, I now go back once in a while and look over them they span 4 years and man can i see the positive changes in my life, i have made one day at a time. hang in there you are worth it!!:flowerforyou: and a big hug!!!

logiesmom

Get a ball bat and start swinging at his head. You won't be eating and plus you will burn some calories at the same time.

All joking aside, Try working out or walking like somebody else mentioned.

wannabeeskinny

:bigsmile:
i may try the kick the grouch's butt exercsie
:happy:

Lizjkp

Have you thought of taking a course in Reiki (Universal Energy ) it has done wonders for me with stress which also made me eat tooooooooooooo much without thinking:noway: how many calories I was consuming :grumble:,
Meditation also works to relieve stress and put you in a good mood, once you have mastered meditation it can help with your weight issues.
How about buying some scented candles, run a lovely bubbly bath and if you have a good book retire for as long as you like if need be add more hot water.
Do a Google search for "REIKI" and read up as much as you can on the subject and decide for
yourself. Good Luck with your decision.

mjfer123

I am an emotional eater
there,,I said it
Im in a HORRID marriage(yes Im getting out but stuck there for the present)
im not going to be a coward and blame him for my weight gain but I will say that the way I am treated,,etc the stress,,,,all led to my grabbing the cheese nips,,,etc
that being said
the weight and the man both must go
double doozy innit?
He still yellls,,,loses temper,,,etc all of that
any helps on what to do when this happens so i DONT grab the cheese and crackers?>
I do realise i need to leave and I am.I just need an in between manner to help cope until I am actually walking

when you feel like eating emotionally
maybe you could go for a walk around the block or town
buy a bike and go for a ride.
Start to do some chores instead.
one of the reasons we eat is because there is nothing else to do.
If you occupy your mind and hands with something, you will be less likely to eat

wannabeeskinny

i love the reki idea
thanks

kellch

I was personally in your position. Not married, but in a horribly abusive relationship. Mental and physical. More mental but turned into physical. As soon as you can safely get out, do it. Personally I had to wait until he went to a football game with the boys for a day. Because of the threats he had made. (hurting my family and hurting me...he actually held a shotgun up to me) I planned my escape and while he was gone, I got a U-haul and paid his little brother to help me get the big things out of the house. I too gained weight mainly due to depression caused by this relationship. I won't get into too many details because I'll end up writing a book. So I'm giving you the basics. I would hide in the room or in our basement crying and eat for comfort. I got up to over 200 lbs. After I left, I got a motel for a week because I was too ashamed to face my family...I needed some "me" time. I then got my own place and I started walking on my lunchbreak at work. And eventually got a dog. I was so upset and even though things were bad, after 3 years with him and his kid, it was wierd coming home to an empty house. (I mainly missed is son...whom I potty trained and took care of most of the time...he cussed and hit before I came along, when I left he was saying please and thank you...sweet little boy...and he was 3 years old still not potty trained...I took care of that....and yes the abuse went on in front of the poor little guy...terrible) Anyhow, I got myself a dog. The dog was motivation to get out and walk. She needed her exercise too. And dogs are a tremendous help in tough times. Very comforting and faithful. Good listeners too :bigsmile: :laugh: I took two years to myself, repairing the emotional damage done, and slowly losing weight on my own. Eventually I met my , now fiance, and have continued losing my weight. Although, it's taken me years to get down to where I am now, I was also working on my emotional issues and the damage he had done. I've come a long way.:drinker:

It is very scary to get out. For several reasons. And it is not easy. But you CAN do it and you ARE worth it. You CAN make it on your own. You deserve RESPECT. And you WILL be happy you did it. Leaving that man is the best decision I have EVER made in my entire lifetime. Listen to Mariah Carey's song "Make it Through the Rain" I remember going to my sisters house and that song came on. I sat in her driveway listening to it. It is sooo inspirational and motivating. Great words. Very good song. You can make it on your own and you are strong enough to mend. Please get out.

As for losing the weight, that will happen when you leave as you begin to take care of "you". Until you can get out, When you get upset go for a walk. A nice long walk. Take in deep breaths as you walk. Smell the air. It always helped to calm me down. And I still do it when the fiance and I have our little arguments (he is a great man but every couple has their disagreements...usually about stupid stuff....like who does more house work :laugh: ) If you for some reason don't want to walk (I know sometimes I didn't want to because I was crying so hard, I didn't want anyone to see me like that), go for a drive and listen to some music, start a journal, do some yoga, call a friend, or come here and play with us.:flowerforyou:

Best of luck to you :flowerforyou:

Phoenix_Rising

Can you try to stock the house with veggies and fruits in the meantime?
Carrots or celery or grapes. Anything you can keep popping in your mouth that isn't horribly loaded in calories while finishing out your sentence. I wish you the best in getting out of there soon!!

kellch

wow......took me so long to type my reply that the thread is wayyyyyyyy down at the bottom :laugh: