Out of personal loss, comes a new life
ELeeBenson
Posts: 5
Dieting- I hate that word. Like most people who have extra pounds to lose, I have tried some of the recognized diets and read many books about healthy eating and nutrition. I have been up and down the weight ladder all my life. I hated being fat and the way I looked. About six years ago, I tried one more time and lost a significant amount of weight, but, I put it back on, just like all the other times.
On January 1st of this year, I joined a private health club because, once again I lost a significant amount of weight and was interested in some personal training sessions. When I was introduced to a trainer his first question was “how did you lose all that weight“. After a slight hesitation he saw I was getting choked up and tears started flowing. I thought and thought then looked at him straight in the eye, wondering what I should tell him. As you read on, you will understand why I was becoming emotional but I wanted to be honest and up front with him.
Now my story begins. Cancer took the life of my lifetime partner April 12, 2010. We were together for fifteen years and were both morbidly obese. Now, what if that person who you depended on to help you get dressed by putting on your socks because you can’t reach your feet and be there for you other times when you need help, is suddenly taken to the hospital? What if you can’t walk the long distances from the parking lot, or walk the long hallways of the hospitals without being in pain from your bad knees and hips, and diabetic neuropathy in your feet? What if you were so fat you had difficulty breathing? What if you learn from the doctor that the person you depend on does not have long to live and you should make plans for their death and funeral?
That was the situation I found myself in. I suddenly realized I was going to be alone and fear set in. I was going to be without my companion who I depended on so much. My partner came home after a five week hospital stay then lived for another six days under the care of Hospice at Home before he passed away. Suddenly, I found myself in survival mode. I knew I had to change my lifestyle, and quick or I wouldn’t make it.
Almost cold turkey, I started making healthy food choices. I avoided fast food like the plague and learned that protein is a fat burner. I lost 110 pounds just by changing my food intake alone. Having reached this new level I felt I needed help to strengthen and condition my body and lose additional pounds, so that’s when I joined the health club and started working with a personal trainer.
To date, I have lost 147 pounds over the last two years. That's 40% of my body. I have gone from weighing 359 pounds and a waist of 58 inches, to 212 pounds and a waist of 38 inches. Through physical exercise, I have gained strength and endurance and able to do exercises that were impossible to do before. A body analysis shows that I am at my suggested weight for my frame and exercise level and I have 13.3% body fat which is within the suggested range of 12-15%. However, I do want to lose a few more pounds and that’s why I started working with a nutrition coach and joined MyFitnessPal to help me better understand what I am eating and where I need to make adjustments.
I know I have touched many lives as I tell my story and cope everyday with my loss, while at the same time dealing with my new lifestyle. I have been told time after time what an inspiration I am. My two daughters are extremely proud of me and have watched me grow and become stronger every day. Friends and co-workers who haven’t seen me for a long time are amazed and don’t recognize me. They say, where is the rest of you!
Six months after my partner passed away, Hospice at Home conducted a “Service of Remembrance” for our loved ones and we were allowed to pick a black granite stone with a word inscribed on it to take home with us. I chose one that reads “Inspire” not knowing how that was going to affect my new life. It sits on my desk, right next to my computer and is a constant reminder of the impact I have had on others, locally and around the world through friends I have made on internet social groups, and how their responses have impacted me.
Do we need a life changing event or something that shocks or knocks us in the head to tell us we are playing a deadly game with our health? To those who read this, has my story been your wake up call? Did I get your attention? Have I inspired you? Have I paid it forward? If so, I am pleased and blessed because that's my motivation and inspiration.
I always look to see what positive can come from tragedies and negative situations. Sometimes we don’t always see that. Let my tragedy be your incentive and inspiration. Tell your loved ones and friends everyday that you love them. You never know when they will be taken away from you, or you away from them. I am 71 years old. If I can do it, you can too. Thank you for allowing me to share this with you.
On January 1st of this year, I joined a private health club because, once again I lost a significant amount of weight and was interested in some personal training sessions. When I was introduced to a trainer his first question was “how did you lose all that weight“. After a slight hesitation he saw I was getting choked up and tears started flowing. I thought and thought then looked at him straight in the eye, wondering what I should tell him. As you read on, you will understand why I was becoming emotional but I wanted to be honest and up front with him.
Now my story begins. Cancer took the life of my lifetime partner April 12, 2010. We were together for fifteen years and were both morbidly obese. Now, what if that person who you depended on to help you get dressed by putting on your socks because you can’t reach your feet and be there for you other times when you need help, is suddenly taken to the hospital? What if you can’t walk the long distances from the parking lot, or walk the long hallways of the hospitals without being in pain from your bad knees and hips, and diabetic neuropathy in your feet? What if you were so fat you had difficulty breathing? What if you learn from the doctor that the person you depend on does not have long to live and you should make plans for their death and funeral?
That was the situation I found myself in. I suddenly realized I was going to be alone and fear set in. I was going to be without my companion who I depended on so much. My partner came home after a five week hospital stay then lived for another six days under the care of Hospice at Home before he passed away. Suddenly, I found myself in survival mode. I knew I had to change my lifestyle, and quick or I wouldn’t make it.
Almost cold turkey, I started making healthy food choices. I avoided fast food like the plague and learned that protein is a fat burner. I lost 110 pounds just by changing my food intake alone. Having reached this new level I felt I needed help to strengthen and condition my body and lose additional pounds, so that’s when I joined the health club and started working with a personal trainer.
To date, I have lost 147 pounds over the last two years. That's 40% of my body. I have gone from weighing 359 pounds and a waist of 58 inches, to 212 pounds and a waist of 38 inches. Through physical exercise, I have gained strength and endurance and able to do exercises that were impossible to do before. A body analysis shows that I am at my suggested weight for my frame and exercise level and I have 13.3% body fat which is within the suggested range of 12-15%. However, I do want to lose a few more pounds and that’s why I started working with a nutrition coach and joined MyFitnessPal to help me better understand what I am eating and where I need to make adjustments.
I know I have touched many lives as I tell my story and cope everyday with my loss, while at the same time dealing with my new lifestyle. I have been told time after time what an inspiration I am. My two daughters are extremely proud of me and have watched me grow and become stronger every day. Friends and co-workers who haven’t seen me for a long time are amazed and don’t recognize me. They say, where is the rest of you!
Six months after my partner passed away, Hospice at Home conducted a “Service of Remembrance” for our loved ones and we were allowed to pick a black granite stone with a word inscribed on it to take home with us. I chose one that reads “Inspire” not knowing how that was going to affect my new life. It sits on my desk, right next to my computer and is a constant reminder of the impact I have had on others, locally and around the world through friends I have made on internet social groups, and how their responses have impacted me.
Do we need a life changing event or something that shocks or knocks us in the head to tell us we are playing a deadly game with our health? To those who read this, has my story been your wake up call? Did I get your attention? Have I inspired you? Have I paid it forward? If so, I am pleased and blessed because that's my motivation and inspiration.
I always look to see what positive can come from tragedies and negative situations. Sometimes we don’t always see that. Let my tragedy be your incentive and inspiration. Tell your loved ones and friends everyday that you love them. You never know when they will be taken away from you, or you away from them. I am 71 years old. If I can do it, you can too. Thank you for allowing me to share this with you.
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Replies
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wow! Great story0
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Very well said! I am sorry for your loss, and rejoice with you in the changes that loss inspired. I am certain your partner smiles upon you each and every day, rejoicing in the fact that it will be quite some time before you join him!! Keep up the great work!0
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Beautiful story. I definitely feel inspired. I hope when you are ready you find someone special again. Thanks for sharing your story and I see why your daughters are so proud of you!:flowerforyou:0
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Thank you for this post. I have been having a hard week and I think this is just what I needed to read. You are one amazing guy, your right if you can do it so can I.0
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ELee, I am so sorry for your loss. You have turned it around into an amazing and life-affirming thing. I am amazed at how you have turned it into a way to inspire others. Your partner lives on each time you encourage someone else to make a better choice for their health. Congratulations on your success!0
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Thank you for sharing this story. Everything you have achieved is a tribute to the one you loved. Keep inspiring those around you.0
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:bigsmile: I agree with everything! This new me all Started because of Star...I didn't want death and hard times to harden my heart!
Bring it !!!
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That was very touching. Thank you for sharing.0
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Such a touching story. Hope each and every day gets a little easier for you!!!!0
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Thank you, bless you x0
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Thank you, bless you x0
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Thank you so much for sharing your story. I too know the pain of seeing a loved one battle cancer. My dad passed away of Hodgkin's disease in 2001 and my Mom passed away of ovarian/ colon/ liver cancer last eayr in June. I was right by my Mom's side through it all including her last day. After she died~ there was so much I wanted to do...so much I wanted to change and help. But I was not ready. After having some time to work things out...I first wanted to change my eating habits for good and start exercising. This is something I am working on right now. And I was hoping to inspire others along the way. I found this site and I am so happy i did. Its so easy to inspire others on here. And my family.... I wanted to inspire them as well. My kids and husband are making healthier choices and exercising as well now. And some of my other family members have followed in my path as well. I am really hoping to inspire others and then I want to help cancer patients some how. I haven't figured out how yet...but I want to help. I figured i need to get myself together before I could help or inspire others. Thank you so much for your post. I am so sorry for your loss. Good luck to you on the rest of your journey!0
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Aw you made me cry! I'm so pleased to see you moving in the right direction after such heartbreak. I wish all the best for you.0
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I'm very sorry for your loss. How wonderful that you were able to take a painful situation and use it as a turning point towards a positive life.
You are certainly inspiring, thanks for sharing your story.0 -
Thank you for sharing. Your compassion and resilience are true blessings and an inspiration.
Laura0 -
Yours is a wonderful story too. You have taken a path that will reap rewards for you and your family, and in time you will know how and when you can best serve others and you will be a blessing to those around you. I was actually responding to Campnhike above, I don't know how it ended up here. But I want to thank all of you for your wonderful messages, they are an encouragement to me and there are so many wonderful stories to tell. I wish all of you the best as you journey down the path of better health.0
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Thank you for sharing your story. I can only imagine the emotions you have gone through losing a partner. I commend you on picking yourself up, through the pain, and beginning a new life. You are an inspiration to me. I wish you the very best.0
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Thank you for your story and I'm so sorry for your loss. I found your story so inspiring and I can relate a bit. In May of 2010 I weighed 347 lbs. and was diagnosed with diabetes. I all of a sudden was taking insulin 4x a day along with other medications. I totally had the scare of my life and made the healthy changes that very first day and haven't looked back. I tell so many people don't wait until you are in a similar position I was in where there is a tragedy or terrible scare that makes you start your new healthy journey. I now take ZERO insulin or diabetes medication and the disease is under control. I go to the gym almost everyday and have lost 120 lbs.
Your journey is amazing and I thank you for sharing it with us. I know your posting with benefit others and inspire them. I will call you what my daughter calls me................... You are a "thinspiration"!!!!!!!!!!!!0 -
Thanks for sharing your success story and I wish you all the best as you continue on this journey called life.0
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Congratulations on your success and turning such a difficult situation into a positive. Thank you for the inspiration.0
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wow. thank you for sharing your story and congrats on changing your life0
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I hope those that read your story will see the very important part of it! Not that losing weight was the journey that you are proud of...but rather the journey of getting HEALTHY! You said yourself that you lost and gained many times in life, but you never got healthy! Because you have learned and live a healthy lifestyle, you WILL be able to sustain your healthy living for a lifetime!
Thank you for sharing your story, more "dieters" need to have a wake up call and realize that weight loss shouldn't be the goal. Living a healthy lifestyle will bring you weightloss but will last forever and it IS something you can pass on to others!
Blessings to you!0 -
Your story is really an inspiration. You look amazing and you have accomplished so much. When i think about wanting to put a bad food in my body or not exercising I think of stories like this. Please keep us updated on your journey.0
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Truly adored your weightloss journey it truly opened my eyes of how much I adore my daughters , I keep reminding myself only if am healthy and well can I take care of them.This is lifestyle change.
Thanks for posting your story.0 -
Thank you for having the strength to share your story.0
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Thank you for sharing the story.. Yes, it is indeed a great inspiration and what an example you have given us...I am sure whoever reads this story would be motivated to change their decision in a healthy direction :-)0
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Wow, what an inspiring and powerful story you have. I am so sorry for your loss, I too know the pain of losing a loved one. My late husband was diabetic and refused to follow doctors orders. His was a classic case of neglect and denial and in the end all the things they say will happen if you are a diabetic that does not make lifestyle changes do happen. His last years were miserable and the pain he was in was great. Although intellectually I knew that I had to make changes if I wanted to have a better quality of life, It has taken me three years to get on the right path; your story is proof that it can be done, and after reading your post, I am going to do this. Your daughters should be proud of you; for so many things, but mostly because you took tragedy and used it to change your life so that you could be here for a long time. Your partner must surely be proud of you too. I wish you the best and thank you for sharing such a personal story that will inspire many.0
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Oh my gosh I cried so bad. I know how it can be to lose someone y0
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Oh my gosh I cried so bad. I know how it can be to lose someone you l0
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Oh my gosh I cried so bad. I know how it can be to lose someone you love to cancer. I was inspired by your story and I'm glad that something positive came from it. Congratulations on the weight loss, you should be so proud of yourself.0
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