A Poem for January.......

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T'was the month after Christmas,
and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse.

The cookies I'd nibbled, the chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber),

I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."

As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter, disguised as a man!"

So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.

Replies

  • hdtoolgirl
    hdtoolgirl Posts: 93 Member
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    T'was the month after Christmas,
    and all through the house,
    Nothing would fit me,
    not even a blouse.

    The cookies I'd nibbled, the chocolate I'd taste
    At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

    When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
    When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber),

    I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
    The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
    The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
    And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."

    As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
    And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
    I said to myself, as I only can,
    "You can't spend a winter, disguised as a man!"

    So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
    Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
    Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
    Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

    I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
    I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
    I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
    I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

    I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
    But isn't that what January is for?
    Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
    Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.
  • Losing_It
    Losing_It Posts: 3,271 Member
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    LOL---I hear that!!! Great poem, thanks for sharing!:flowerforyou:
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
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    :laugh: :laugh: That's cute.
  • heather0mc
    heather0mc Posts: 4,656 Member
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    hmmm, i am hungry now! :huh: