SUPPORT, WHAT DOES THIS WORD MEAN TO YOU??

ycc1964

Is it just me or does it seem like some people don't understand that support is a give and take, I don't know about you but I am on this site because I need your support and I encourage my friends daily because I believe that is why we are here. Unforturnately, I noticed that some people will never say a word, WHY DID YOU ADD ME AS YOUR FRIEND IF I AM INVISIBLE?????

glockster972

Right...it goes both ways

mrmarius

yea it happens for various reasons
some have so many friends that they can't keep up others just collect and some are busy i try to support all in some way

SmartFunGorgeous

I hear that. And then sometimes you offer support and friendship, and they delete YOU. But there are many more who will offer support, so delete the quiet ones and keep cheering the others!

SailingMike

Support to me is a comfortable girdle.

daves160

I try to give an encouraging blip to most my friends updates. If they need support, I will give them more than just a "good job". I may even send a personal message. Sometimes you need to ask for the support though. otherwise, no one knows.

Tiffanydepiano

I seem to have a lot friends that have a lot of friends.
I am there 100% if I am messaged or approached through e-mail. Otherwise it seems redundant for people to have 25 "Good Jobs" below their postings.

Contrarian

Support to me is a comfortable girdle.

Or an underwired bra.

oopsiedaezie

I am very sorry to hear that some friends are not being supportive. To me, seeing those "atta girl" comments really make my day and in a way I feel a little bit accountable to my MFP friends; and it makes me try harder and keep focused on my fitness goals. It definitely goes two ways though, I am not trying to sell myself or anything; but I try to make it a point to comment and post on people's pages because I think that I should help others as much as I am helped. Anyway. I hope it gets better for you and if people are just being selfish, then maybe those are not friendships worth keeping. Good luck!
~Daisy

bry_all01

I can only handle so many, because I encourage and support and expect the same in return. Why request me if you have no intentions of talking to me? I recently did a sweeping of deletiions due to some personal issues and too many "friends". I felt i needed to get back to me. I had rather hoped no one would have any hard feelings.... I'm just trying to remain true to me.

2_Up

Isn't that what happens for 18 years after you mess up one night?

Mariposa187

I agree! i felt so bad when my computer was broken for a month and a half because i couldnt get on to support my friends on here. Just keep looking adding and deleting until you find the right kind of support system you need. Some people are super involved and others are not just depends on their lives.

ycc1964

I hear that. And then sometimes you offer support and friendship, and they delete YOU. But there are many more who will offer support, so delete the quiet ones and keep cheering the others!

Yeah, I really enjoy helping and being helped. I just deleted some who have me as their ghost friend. Lol

pffssas

I believe sometimes its something as simple as time zone or timing. I have over 400 friends and I try my best to "hi-five" everyone of them every day...but if I get stuck at work or have a really busy day, the computer only lets me go back "so far" (usually 9-10hrs) to congratulate everyone on my newsfeed. If someone isn't supporting you the way you want to be supported, delete them if its stressing you (why bother) or accept that they may be simply shy ar really busy (and luv them to success anyway!). I see you comment on all of your friends statuses so you're a "giver", don't be upset...some people are just naturally "takers". Whatever you do don't delete me...i luv your support lol!

WifeNMama

Support means that even when you feel like diving face-first into a 4 litre bucket of chocolate ice cream, your friend will pull you back, by the hair, if need be, and put the lid back on.
Support means that even when you feel like bawling your eyes out because you don't feel motivated, and you want to give up, they toss you your sneakers and suggest a walk.
Support means that even when you are at your lowest, your friend remembers you at your best and reminds you of it.
Support means your friend sees you fall and get hurt, and tells you "That is gonna be one wicked scar to tell the grandkids about."

I now feel as though I could write scripts for after school specials...

WifeNMama

yea it happens for various reasons
some have so many friends that they can't keep up others just collect and some are busy i try to support all in some way

I don't want to be collected. I'm not a stamp, or a porcelain figurine, or a beanie baby... and I have better things to do than sit on someones shelf, collecting dust. :-P

ycc1964

I believe sometimes its something as simple as time zone or timing. I have over 400 friends and I try my best to "hi-five" everyone of them every day...but if I get stuck at work or have a really busy day, the computer only lets me go back "so far" (usually 9-10hrs) to congratulate everyone on my newsfeed. If someone isn't supporting you the way you want to be supported, delete them if its stressing you (why bother) or accept that they may be simply shy ar really busy (and luv them to success anyway!). I see you comment on all of your friends statuses so you're a "giver", don't be upset...some people are just naturally "takers". Whatever you do don't delete me...i luv your support lol!

I don't want to delete anyone, but it is just not fair. I'm not asking for much or even a conversation daily. I agree and understand that we are not all in the same time zone's but if I can go back for days to make sure I don't miss anyone, then can some of them just say hello sometimes???

ycc1964

yea it happens for various reasons
some have so many friends that they can't keep up others just collect and some are busy i try to support all in some way

I don't want to be collected. I'm not a stamp, or a porcelain figurine, or a beanie baby... and I have better things to do than sit on someones shelf, collecting dust. :-P

That's what I am saying.

pffssas

My computer doesn't even allow me to go back 24hrs...how are you doing that? After I go back so far it literally stops and I have to go friend by friend until I get caught up. Inbox me the details when you get a moment...

leilani♥

sounds like you got the wrong friends honey

pffssas

sometimes the purpose of someone in your life, is so they can watch you soar...because they need to learn how to.

cownancy

When I first joined, I accepted all friend requests and quickly built up a large number of friends. I found that I'm lucky to have very active friends, so it takes a great deal of time to support all of them every day, so I try to log in as many times a day as possible and spend a few minutes each time working on my wall. I notice that most of my friends who happen to be on around the time that I post are there for me and there is a small percentage who must really backtrack to do all of their friends.

If I had it to do all over again, I probably would not have taken on so many friends, but now that I have them, I do not want to delete them unless they are not active. They don't each have to address all of my posts every day, I get some support from some of them all of the time. I do my best to be there for them, but there ARE days and even stretches of time, that I just do NOT have the time to go back through all of the posts to support everyone. I wish it was different, but that's life.

SUPPORT in the context of MFP means that you "are there" for your chosen friends when they need you. I have found that most people do NOT want their food diaries criticized, so when I say "great job", it means for logging and signing in. That's the hardest part...making that effort every day. I try to blog about things that I hope are of interest to my friends and when I get an email or read a post where someone is struggling, I will try to spend extra time with that person and follow up with them. I do the best I can and still take care of myself and my non-MFP life. I think we all do that!

pffssas

@Nancy...and that is why you're one of my fave mfp's, your heart!!!

ycc1964

When I first joined, I accepted all friend requests and quickly built up a large number of friends. I found that I'm lucky to have very active friends, so it takes a great deal of time to support all of them every day, so I try to log in as many times a day as possible and spend a few minutes each time working on my wall. I notice that most of my friends who happen to be on around the time that I post are there for me and there is a small percentage who must really backtrack to do all of their friends.

If I had it to do all over again, I probably would not have taken on so many friends, but now that I have them, I do not want to delete them unless they are not active. They don't each have to address all of my posts every day, I get some support from some of them all of the time. I do my best to be there for them, but there ARE days and even stretches of time, that I just do NOT have the time to go back through all of the posts to support everyone. I wish it was different, but that's life.

SUPPORT in the context of MFP means that you "are there" for your chosen friends when they need you. I have found that most people do NOT want their food diaries criticized, so when I say "great job", it means for logging and signing in. That's the hardest part...making that effort every day. I try to blog about things that I hope are of interest to my friends and when I get an email or read a post where someone is struggling, I will try to spend extra time with that person and follow up with them. I do the best I can and still take care of myself and my non-MFP life. I think we all do that!

Thanks for your post.

sunkisses

Find the friends you interact with most and drop the ones with whom you do not interact. I'm one of those people who doesn't need any support whatsoever. I'm here because I have a few more pounds to lose and I like the banter I have with the friends I do have. I'm not the pat-you-on-the-back-for-sticking-to-your-calories type. But I'm "supportive' in other ways.

Nikstergirl

sometimes the purpose of someone in your life, is so they can watch you soar...because they need to learn how to.

Ok, Iove this! That's how I'm feeling lately. I'm pretty much at my goal now, so I hope that I can encourage people to keep going no matter what! If I can do it, so can they! But of course, I still like to hear those congrats on a great workout or great clean eating day when I can as well... I still love a little encouragement too!!!

I've deleted people who were negative, and those who weren't logging in for months, but usually I don't delete them. If they come back they might need me!!!!

ycc1964

sometimes the purpose of someone in your life, is so they can watch you soar...because they need to learn how to.

Ok, Iove this! That's how I'm feeling lately. I'm pretty much at my goal now, so I hope that I can encourage people to keep going no matter what! If I can do it, so can they! But of course, I still like to hear those congrats on a great workout or great clean eating day when I can as well... I still love a little encouragement too!!!

I've deleted people who were negative, and those who weren't logging in for months, but usually I don't delete them. If they come back they might need me!!!!

I agree that is a really good post.

AtticusFinch

Support = Sweaty jockstrap