Introduction of ME!!

mommy4ndbandtj

Well I see so many persons here doing the same thing. Here is my story.

I had a baby at 20, and only gained the 30 or so pounds you were supposed to. Bounced right back being so young. Unplanned baby, and handled it like a pro.

Met my supposed "Mr. Wonderful" about five years after. Popped out back to back babies and realized that the drunk stoner I married, had no plan to grow up and give up being a drunk stoner for his family. So I found myself entering 30, with three kids, and alone.

I took on the world and kicked some bottom and took plenty of names. Decided that I should invest the time and energy into my kids, so that is what I did. My weight was always going up and down based on my depression at the time.

So my eldest child graduates high school, and joins the Navy. Great career choice for him, he is VERY successful and continues to move up the food chain. Marries his high school sweetheart, and they move where the Navy sends him. In 2006 my first grandson was due, and he gets ordered for sea duty. So I pick up roots and move 2,300 miles from the place I called home for the last 30 plus years, to be near my budding family. Of course his boat gets back before the birth and there was a crowded delivery room.

With the Navy, he has since been moved two times and had another grandchild. I stayed here in VA, because I married an abusive man, who physically and mentally abused me. I was praying for a way out, and let me tell you, prayers work.

All of a sudden two months after our one year anniversary, I actually got the courage to stand up to him. Had the police remove him from the house after he got physical with me. Found out my strength came from an unplanned pregnancy AGAIN!! Whatever the reason the little baby growing inside me made me invincible, or so I thought.

I was EXTREMELY overweight when I had my last baby. I weighed 250 pounds the last time I would get on the scale in the doctors office. The following visits, I flat out refused to weigh myself. Well had the baby with my teens in tow, and been plugging along since. When he was about 18 months, I was struggling to breathe, and I was done being heavy. I went to my doctor who told me that first I need to master my diet with a food journal. I realized that I was eating things behind the kids because I did not want to throw it away, or store minimal left overs. I cut that part out first. Saw a little success in feeling better and breathing a bit easier. Next was to eliminate soda ~ TOTALLY!! I have never been someone who needed the caffeine rush, so it was not as difficult for me. Saw a little more changes. Then I went in and started counting calories. Kept them under 1500 a day, and got down to 150. Was happy with that, but still wanted to get a bit more, but I had hit a wall and plateaued. So I joined the local gym real close to my house.

I have been plugging along solo since. That is until last April. I had a girlfriend who was on the internet dating sites. She asked me to check out some of the guys who were sending her messages, and I created my own profile to see them fully. Well needless to say, I got inquiries too. Seemed like most of them were married men cheating on their wives, at least the ones who had contacted me. So I got angry and deleted the profile. Then my friend told me of ways to block certain people, so I created a new one. Day one ~ I received an interesting post. Checked him out, and found him to be EXACTLY what I wanted. Not what I needed, because anything we needed I made happen for us. It is hard, especially when the father's of your children decide that being a low life dead beat dad is better than helping support them, but that is a whole other story.

Enter my love, best friend, help mate, supporter, protector, and genuine good guy. We started talking and instantly felt as though we could start and finish each others sentences. Instant connection, conversation flowed like we were old friends catching up rather than total strangers learning about each other. We planned to meet on a Friday night. Of course we would talk on the phone for hours on end, all late into the night. On Thursday night we were talking and he was telling me how he wished it was Friday, so we could finally meet. I was anxious too, so he suggested I should come by now. I asked if he was serious, and he asked me if I would? So the Thursday before our first scheduled date, I went over to break the ice. Not only did I break the ice, I fell through and left at 4 am to hit the gym. That is when I would go, because otherwise I would miss time with my kids.

First date night was smooth. Just a continuation of our phone and physical connection. I was very sickly thin when we started dating, I will admit, but I have since added about 15 - 20 pounds back on to teeter the scales for me above 140. Now I can handle 140 fine, but my clothes are a bit too tight and I am uncomfortable. So I want to be in between being sickly thin and tight fitting clothes.

My weight has yo-yoed most of my adult life and I want off this ride. I keep my diet pretty strict and my exercise real regular (once again)! My same friend who suggested the dating site, suggested this one. I do not have 80 pounds to lose anymore, but I did a little over a year ago. I have been there, and do not desire to ever return there. I would LOVE to have some work out buddies, keeping me honest and sharing ideas and thoughts about getting over the plateaus we all face.

So that is a brief me, about the important things in my life and my weight fluctuation. Now if you want to be friends or suggest things to me......bring it on!!

StormyLlewellyn

Hang tough you got this girl... After all you have been through this won't beat you...

jogdog

Your story is very similar to my mom's. If it wasn't for her strength and support she was for my sister and I when we were younger I don't know where we would've been. I only found out a few years ago that she suffered with depression and that was part of the reason she gained weight because she turned to food because she felt she had no one to share all of her problems and stress with. Great job getting your kids out of a toxic situation and sticking up for them. Now it's time for you! Take care of yourself so you can be an example for your kids and so later on in life you can still be with your kids and grandkids.

kathvg

love the happy ending to your story! there are lots of great guys out there...it's just that they get looked over to often due to the jerks who are out there and are making most of the noise! lol

MdmAcolyte

I think your friend is totally awesome... Oh wait, that is me Hahahaha Im glad you are here and you are doing so well

mommy4ndbandtj

you lost two pounds too? Like the photo of Carlos. Now you will have to teach me how to do that!!