Advice PLEASE!!!

srandle175

I really, really, really want to lose weight!!! Since I made a promise to myself back in August to commit to a healthy lifestyle change I have lost 22lbs. I started MFP September 6th. In my first month I lost 15lbs. I was exercising 5 days a week and trying to change my eating habits I was also drinking about 100 ounces of water a day. But lately I have found myself going back to my old ways. Since the beginning of October I have not lost 1lb. I'm starting to make excuses of why I can't workout, I have been making bad food choices and now I barely drink 40 ounces of water a day.

I know I am the only one to blame for my lack of motivation "BUT" my mother makes it very difficult. She lives with me and helps me with my children. Her eating habits are terrible. She is a very good cook and I love her food. But it is killing me. I try to go grocery shopping for healthier foods for myself and my kids. She loves to cook with a lot of butter, grease, fat and salt. I try to talk to her about what she is cooking and all she said is "just because you’re trying to eat healthy doesn’t mean we have to suffer" talking about my kids and her. I try to tell her I don't want my kids eating that food and she said "you ate this stuff when you were growing up and you turned out fine." She also will say "kids love sugar and I'm going to give it to them." I swear every time I try to eat healthy she will make my favorite foods. I love her to death and I appreciate everything she is doing for me and my kids but she will not listen to anything I have to say. I need advice on how can I stick to a healthy lifestyle and lose weight when someone I live with is making it so difficult.

I really really really want to lose weight and be healthy but its soooooo hard!!!

Megan2Project

I really, really, really want to lose weight!!! Since I made a promise to myself back in August to commit to a healthy lifestyle change I have lost 22lbs. I started MFP September 6th. In my first month I lost 15lbs. I was exercising 5 days a week and trying to change my eating habits I was also drinking about 100 ounces of water a day. But lately I have found myself going back to my old ways. Since the beginning of October I have not lost 1lb. I'm starting to make excuses of why I can't workout, I have been making bad food choices and now I barely drink 40 ounces of water a day.

I know I am the only one to blame for my lack of motivation "BUT" my mother makes it very difficult. She lives with me and helps me with my children. Her eating habits are terrible. She is a very good cook and I love her food. But it is killing me. I try to go grocery shopping for healthier foods for myself and my kids. She loves to cook with a lot of butter, grease, fat and salt. I try to talk to her about what she is cooking and all she said is "just because you’re trying to eat healthy doesn’t mean we have to suffer" talking about my kids and her. I try to tell her I don't want my kids eating that food and she said "you ate this stuff when you were growing up and you turned out fine." She also will say "kids love sugar and I'm going to give it to them." I swear every time I try to eat healthy she will make my favorite foods. I love her to death and I appreciate everything she is doing for me and my kids but she will not listen to anything I have to say. I need advice on how can I stick to a healthy lifestyle and lose weight when someone I live with is making it so difficult.

I really really really want to lose weight and be healthy but its soooooo hard!!!

I don't know how much you have to lose, but for her to say "you ate this stuff when you were growing up and you turned out fin" is so obviously FALSE when you feel you need to lose weight and be healthy now. Right?? I would tell her that she either needs to adhere to your new dietary changes OR she can cook enough for just herself and YOU will take care of cooking for yourself and your kids. You could also negotiate an tell her she can only cook those kinds of meals ONCE per week (then try to portion).

My husband cooks once a week and usually makes something high calorie, so I measure and portion mine, and if its not very much I add a salad or some veggies to fill me up with a glass of water.

Sorry she's not being very supportive, maybe she feels insecure about your positive changes.

TDGee

Really how bad do you want to make the necessary changes. If you really do, you will find a way. If you really don't, you will find a way to do that as well.

aWashCloth

Knowledge is power! You can try and teach your mother about the reason why healthy food is better for you and your family over lots of grease and fats! Show her studies that links these kinds of foods to high blood pressure, heart disease and a lower mortality rate. You love your mom and her cooking, challenge her to try new things and grow as a person. If she is so stubborn she wont accept the truth about the matter, you may just have to be blunt and say that "I want whats best for my kids, and that includes foods that will help them grow, energize them, and keep their mental state focused." Its a really harsh thing to say to your mom, but this is a matter of life and death/ health or heart disease.

ReinasWrath

Really how bad do you want to make the necessary changes. If you really do, you will find a way. If you really don't, you will find a way to do that as well.

I just want to say your "you can do it " thing is awesome xD

suzi67

Are you the one purchasing the food? If so, stop buying the unhealthy stuff. If she is bringing it in, tell her that she can eat it, but the rest of you don't have to suffer with it. Standing up to our parents, especially when they are helping in other areas of our lives, can be challenging, but you are the only advocate for your children and yourself.

Blackthorne99

"BUT" my mother makes it very difficult. She lives with me and helps me with my children. Her eating habits are terrible.

Doesn't sound to me like she *is* helping YOU with the children. It sounds to me like she is FIGHTING you. Find someone else to 'help you' with the children that aren't going to kill you in the process.

CCLadyBug

I agree with Chickie_20 whole heartedly. Stand your ground with your Mom. You can do it in love. Make up your mind about what you believe and what you want for yourself and your children. Write it out on paper, practice it. Get it down deep in your heart, because that's what's going to come out of your mouth and what's going to drive you - your convictions. Then tell her how it's going to be. You are the one in charge of your life and your children's lives. YOU'RE their mother. Praying for strength for you, friend.

Partyofpugs

You are in a difficult place. As adult children we find it very difficult to stand up to our Moms. But you have to do it. I had to take a stand with my Mom on a different issue and it caused a rift that was difficult to mend. But you absolutely have to do it. Offer an alternative (I like the cook for yourself and for all of you 1 day a week). If she refuses then you will have to ask her to leave. If you are in her home, then you will have to leave. We learn so much about how to eat from our parents and obviously her methods weren't the best. Your kids are getting sent mixed messages which may contribute to eating disorders later. Do this for you and your kids. Good luck.