Breaking up STINKS!!!

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krissypea79
krissypea79 Posts: 362 Member
in Chit-Chat
Why is it that someone annoys the daylights out of you to the point where you're so unhappy for weeks, you lose attraction to them, you're nit-picking & arguing, disagreeing about everything, all of a sudden don't want to spend any time with them, so you break up with them because it's for the best, but as soon as you do, you sort of miss them?! And start looking at their Facebook and getting somewhat jealous that they're going out with their friends, etc. Grrrrrrr!!! LOL. *gotta keep reminding myself of the reasons why I was unhappy!!!* SO HARD!

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  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    It's because you ignore addressing the issue(s) that lead you to break up.
  • alex215
    alex215 Posts: 518 Member
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    the idea that grass is always greener on the other side.
  • Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused
    Sublimely_Self_Righteousreused Posts: 935 Member
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    The sex was good?
  • shesblossoming
    shesblossoming Posts: 426
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    Would you still feel that way if they were doing absolutely nothing after the break up? Also, when you're with someone, regardless of how much they annoy you, you don't necessarily miss THEM but the moments you had with them and the good memories. When we're with someone, we want them to shut up. When we're apart from them, it's a different story we make up for ourselves. It'll be okay with time though. And quit looking at his Facebook!
  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
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    Bit like eating. You know some things aren't good for you so you cut them out of your life and then spend all your time yearning for them. :noway:
  • miss200
    miss200 Posts: 16
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    Bit like eating. You know some things aren't good for you so you cut them out of your life and then spend all your time yearning for them. :noway:

    Great quote and pretty much sums it up. Never thought of it like that.
  • aldale
    aldale Posts: 118 Member
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    You feel this way because it is someone that you care about. I mean why did you continue to date for weeks even when you were not happy. BUT just because you care about someone does not mean you should be with that person! It is human to love and care for someone and to miss the happy times. Just try to keep yourself busy so that you will not dwell on your feelings. Good Luck to you!
  • Kalrez
    Kalrez Posts: 655 Member
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    I think the Facebook stalking thing is kinda normal.

    When my ex and I got divorced, I made it a point to add him to my blocked list. That way I would not see him in any searches, would not see his posts on mutual friends' posts. I mean, there were other reasons for blocking him too, but it definitely helped break me out of that "what's he up to" thing.

    You broke up with this dude for a reason. Block him so you can't stalk him. Move on.
  • Thinwithin2010
    Thinwithin2010 Posts: 166 Member
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    If they annoy you that much then you did the right thing! If its not in your heart why stay? Run fast and get back out into the world, enjoy friends, family, find a new hobby?? Anything to keep you busy and most of all do not let this cause you to destroy you weight loss intentions. In time you will feel better!! Who cares what the other person is doing. I am sure they aren't as happy as you think. Keep you head up and eyes open for the one who sweeps you off your feet. Good luck!
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
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    It's because you ignore addressing the issue(s) that lead you to break up.

    Bingo.
  • krissypea79
    krissypea79 Posts: 362 Member
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    I stayed a few weeks because i wanted to see if things would change. I tried. We had started out as friends and I had seen some small things in his personality during that time, but no real deal-breakers, but then as we started as a couple I saw some more red flags and some vast differences between us (how he handles work stress, general opinions towards people & things, differences in religion, where we want to live one day, financial responsibility, etc) - but I wanted to give it a try. I was genuinely happy for a month or so and then something clicked and I didn't feel the same. So I took some time to think about it, I pulled back and asked him if it was OK if we spent a little less time together, and that didn't change how I felt. Problem is, we agreed to stay friends since we really weren't together THAT long & we started off as friends...but he got so emotionally attached that he's still being really nice to me, texting me etc even though he is hurt. I don't want to cut off all ties with him because I DO care about him, just more as a friend than a boyfriend. I am sure the feelings of "jealousy" will subside, guess it'll take a little time. The breakup only happened 3 days ago. Thanks for the input!

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