Family frustrations

AloyMomNwife

Last week I remember reading a post about a woman who was frustrated with her sister because she'd rather have a gastric bypass than try and lose weight by changing bad habits and using the help MFP provides. I don't remember who posted the story but I am battling a family member frustration myself so that story kept circling my head.

My mother is 5'1" and weighs 220 lbs. She leads a very sedentary lifestyle and this has affected her health a lot, especially in the last 5-7 years. She developed hypothyroidism, lumbar disc problems, high-blood pressure, osteopenia (what comes before osteoporosis) and she is not even 60 years old yet. I decided to start getting in shape again because I realized I was becoming her at a much younger age and I didn't want to end up like that before my 40th bday (I'm 33).

I started working out 5-6 days/week in Jan. 2011 but didn't change my eating habits until a friend told me about MFP. I signed up and have been logging in consistently for little over a month and have already lost 7 lbs. I enjoy MFP so much I have told my mother several times to join and start tracking her food. I hate it that every time she "naahhh"s me. She is very "healthy" to be so overweight, cholesterol and sugar levels-wise, so she doesn't think she has any problems with her eating habits.

I spent last weekend at my parents house, since we live far we stay a few days whenever we visit. I noticed, again, my mother's bad eating habits. She nibbles on crackers or cheese while she's cooking and then eats just a salad for every meal. Then she wonders why she can't lose weight. She's not an organized eater. Sometimes she has way too many hours between meals and eats desperately. I have no doubt that if she logged in her food in the MFP diary she would notice her mistakes and start fixing them. About 8 years ago she lost almost 60 lbs guided by a bariatric doctor who designed a diet for her specific needs. At that time she would walk every day, sometimes for over 2 hrs at a time. Even my husband checked her out at some point. She looked gorgeous!! But she got bored of it all and gained it all back and more. Now she can't spend more than 2 hrs, tops, on her feet, without having her back killing her with pain.

This weekend she told me something that hit my frustration button more than any other time before. She said: "I know I have to start working out but I'm definitely not gonna do what I did when I lost weight 8 years ago and walk for 2 or more hours in a workout. That's just too boring." Already she built a wall that blocks the light at the end of the tunnel. It is like she gave up before even starting. This hit me so hard I decided to not say anything else for a while. I have tried to motivate her in so many ways, especially by example, and she keeps rejecting my help. I'm going to retract for some time. I just worry about her health and her quality of life. If she keeps gaining weight and not exercising she will be handicapped in less than 10 years. I hate that she won't be able to enjoy her grandkids or my father's retirement.

I don't know what gets to her for motivation anymore. :frown: