MFP Newbie - Less than 10lb from Goal

foxtayle
foxtayle Posts: 17 Member
edited October 4 in Introduce Yourself
Hi everyone. At my heaviest (freshman year of high school 10+ years ago) I was 150lbs at 4'9". I have gone down (then up, then down, then up) over the years and am now 5'1" and 29 and at a healthy weight. My immediate family is very overweight and many family members on both sides have developed Type II Diabetes. Losing my favorite uncle in his late 50's due to his issues with Diabetes really inspired me to take my health more seriously and go against the grain of family history.

I have had a weight goal (100 lbs) for myself for YEARS since I began college. It is a lean weight, but still within healthy range for my size and frame. I reached my goal weight 2 years ago but it was a mixed bag -- I couldn't really appreciate it; my weight dropped during a very stressful and emotional time. I do remember what my body looked like though at that weight and I want to reach it again - though in a healthy and sustainable way through eating right and being active.

I've heard the term "vanity pounds," and would agree I'm probably at that stage. The last stretch is the hardest.

I'm here because I'm so frustrated that it's been 2 years and I have not reattained that goal. I'm not sure why I keep standing in my own way. I'm hoping while here I can figure it out. The closest I've gotten to it is 2.5 lbs away. When I didn't make a deadline I set for myself, I'd give in to disappointment and shoot myself in the foot by eating emotionally for 2-3 days negating all my hard work, with my discouragement and fatigue leading to not being consistently as active for another month or so. I have yo-yo'd these last 12lbs like this for nearly a year. I am banging my head against a wall because it always boils down to me giving in and not maintaining my good habits.

Now, it's just the principle of the thing. I WANT TO ACHIEVE THIS GOAL. I SET THIS GOAL. I KNOW I CAN MAKE IT. I want to teach myself to maintain discipline and not sabotage myself when I am so close.

As of this morning I am 8lbs away. I know that I am not in bad shape. I know that I am "fit," but I look WAAAAY better in clothes and do not maintain my confidence without them. I am gradually learning to like more parts of my body but still have major issue with my stomach and waist. It is round, juts out and is squishy. I would love to earn a flat stomach and an overall lean, toned body. I want to do this the right way.

I have gotten much better about logging my food and exercise, but I am hoping that taking advantage of community support and making time to blog and reflect on my challenges will help me overcome them once and for all.

Thank you for listening.

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