Right, I'm cleaning out my closet...again

helenoftroy1

I've been doing my "journey" since April so 6 months. I had my ups and downs like everyone but the last 3/4 weeks I have majorly slipped off the wagon. Cheese has found it's way back into the house, and I had diet soft drinks the other day. Plus I ate a cake and didn't feel guilty! In order to try and get back on the wagon I climbed a mountain literally. Granted I was fitter than when I did it in April. However I keep saying I'm going to get back on it, I will etc. I'm lacking something. It's winter now so I want wholesome foods and I'm trying to stick to soup and still make my good choices but...
Well I think the problem is I actually quite like myself now. I lost 44 lbs so far and I'd like to ideally lose another 14lbs. But I'm in no hurry! I have no idea why or when this realisation came to me but I didn't log for one day last week and there goes 150 days of commitment. I needed that, I know it sounds daft but even though I wasn't as commited I still logged daily.
I also think I've not been coming on the community boards recently what with work and college and I think I need those. I also don't seem to have time anymore, seriously I fall asleep at the drop of a hat and hours have gone by and I didn't even notice!
Anyway this has turned into a rant but what I really wanted was for someone to say they know what I'm going through. I am commited but I'm losing my way slightly. Help?

MrsSWW

You have done wonderfully so far, Helen, Jeez I'm liking myself at the minute and I've not even hit 30 lost yet! If you've slipped a bit it's because you can look back and say you slogged your guts out doing it AND you're looking fab!!!

Anyway. Word of warning from me now. In 2010 I started logging food (I hadn't heard of MFP then), bought a Pilates machine, and lost a couple of stone for my wedding - and although I was still far from ideal weight I felt GREAT! Pilates had really toned me, I didn't look too bad in a bikini (until I saw pics), and I spent two weeks in Greece on honeymoon eating and drinking like a pig. We went with friends who insisted on having a big meal every lunchtime and every evening, something Roy and I would never do on our own, and when we got back I didn't stop. Hell, I was newly married, everyone is supposed to gain a little weight aren't they, cooking for new hubby, blah-blah-blah.... well, not when they've already been together 17 years!!!

I ended 2010 the heaviest I have ever been, the last stone or so gained in December, having broken my ribs when I slipped lifting the dog from the bath and landing with my full weight on the edge. He's only got 3 legs so I had to save him, not me All that Christmas food and not able to move...I hated that I had worked so hard for the first 6 months only to let it all come back in the last 6 months - and some more besides - especially when I felt so good on my wedding day.

So, I started my MFP journey in February this year, went to Cornwall in June and ate like a pig for 2 weeks (Pasty for breakfast anyone?). Drank like a pig. Didn't log.

BUT, the difference this time is that I came back and started logging again. I wasn't necessarily GOOD, but I logged everything. It's too easy to let the odd pack of pork scratchings, a midweek bottle of wine with a family bag of peanuts, or chips start sneaking back in.... but I found that it was almost like learning again, as I did all the way back in February, about what is good, bad or merely needs portion control....

The mind can play funny tricks on us, tell us that it's okay to have those treats, enjoy the feeling as that chocolate bar melts and goes gooey in your mouth, casually forget to weigh a small bowl of peanuts and scoff straight from the huge bag. It conveniently forgets in that moment how bad you feel that you can't buy wellies in a normal shop because your legs are too fat, or that Primark no longer cater for your boobs in any clothes, or how you ignore the bus that sails past you because you know if you try to run 50 yards your face will look like a beetroot about to pop!!

Sorry, rant over, just letting you know what worked for me. Log everything still, hide your diary if you want, but keep at it Helen, don't let your brain brainwash you, lol!! Oh, and the nights are getting darker, it's natural to need more sleep, if it gets too bad speak to your GP about SAD.

XXX

skinnyinnotime

Aww Helen, don't be hard on yourself for having some cheese and diet drinks, nothing wrong with some treats now and again. So you should like yourself, you've worked bloody hard to get where you are now, I've watched all your logging including those incredible swim burns, you're a machine in the pool!!

Why not maintain for a while and see how you feel then, maybe you need some time out and then you can go for those last 14lbs?

I know you can do whatever you set your mind and heart on!!

lupa01

You said a mouth full. I think that helped everybody, thanks!!