MY OLDER SISTER CALLED ME OVERWEIGHT/FAT

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  • shannon121278
    shannon121278 Posts: 357
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    I say people who call names and judge other people are only insecure about themselves. I understand fully that words can hurt, and even more so when they come from family or people who are close to you. Don't use her harsh words as something to break you down. Use them to prove her wrong and be able to get healthy.

    There is definitely a lot of support here on mfp, but we can only do so much being only internet based friends. I have found loads of encouragement and positive comments all around by people on here and it has helped me a lot. I've lost 20 pounds so far, but still have a long way to go, about 60 or so more, so I've got a long journey ahead of me. I can be a positive supportive online friend if you would like to add me. I can listen, chat, and give a push to stay on track.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    Two options...

    1) If you can't do it for yourself, do it for that gorgeous baby of yours! She deserves a healthy happy Mommy, right?!

    2) Let your sister dictate how you feel about yourself and therefore life in general with her cutting comments.

    Come on now - you know which is the better choice!

    I know where you're coming from too. About two years ago when I announced to my mother and brother that I planned on joining WW the following January, my brother basically rolled his eyes at me and said "again?". Like I couldn't do it and what was the point of trying again and failing again. I could of let his comments cut me down and keep me down but EFF THAT BS! I turned it around and made it my motivation for those early days when I wasn't sure I could do it. Now he's one of my biggest supporters because he sees I'm serious this time, am doing it and will get to goal and stay there.

    So, instead of feeling bad for yourself, get mad and get moving!
  • reneelee
    reneelee Posts: 877 Member
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    This is the best time to lose the weight. Breast feeding takes a lot of calories.
  • elysecea
    elysecea Posts: 161 Member
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    Just take what she said in stride to be happy with yourself!!! You can do this! You have so much support right here at your finger tips! Just hold your chin high and change what you want to change!! Challenge your inner beast!!!!!
  • mommacuca
    mommacuca Posts: 19 Member
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    thank you everyone, there are some post on here that I really loved but since im new dont know how to quote it and respond lol - but thank you very much
  • tritt86
    tritt86 Posts: 32
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    I know how you feel. After I delivered my baby I was compared to Violet on Willy Wonka. Yes, it hurt a bit. Keep with it though!! It took me almost 1 year and a half to start losing weight. It gets easier as you go along with this journey. Do this for yourself! You deserve to be happy! As for you sister, what a cruel thing to say!! By the way, congrats on the baby!!
  • Fatbuster205
    Fatbuster205 Posts: 333 Member
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    Do not quit! I had a super petite, slim older sister who used to do the same. She said it mainly to try and motivate me but I felt differently in how I took it. Unfortunately she is no longer with me to give me "advice" good or bad as she passed away three years ago in a car accident! Believe me I would have her back tomorrow giving me a ton of grief. But I am on MFP and I am losing weight and I am succeeding and I will continue to succeed and I will accept what anyone says to me good or bad. If I don't like what someone says I just calmly say "That was a bit rude/insensitive/thoughless/personal" - the look on the person's face is usually total shock and believe me, they do not come back with adverse comments to my face again. They may say things behind my back but I cannot control that so I do not worry about it! As to 31lb - look at some other people on this site who have 100lbs or more to lose and look at those who have lost that and more! Be strong and just tell her that she is being insensitve - try and have a good conversation and explain why you are doing this, how you feel about yourself and that you would appreciate her support. Finally, most of us on this site are overweight/fat at the beginning - accept that what your sister has said is true. At least she loves you enough to be honest with you and maybe she says it because she wants to help?
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
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    I just feel hopeless now - like "how am I going to do this. ugh 31 lbs to go? thats crazy

    3 months of logging and sticking to it saw me scream past that number, its as impossible /crazy as you make it.

    I've lost 48 of baby weight and I am SOOO not a "fitness" type person. If ***I*** can do it, ANYONE can. Trust me on that.
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
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    Your sister is a douche! She is probably jealous of you and feels the need to criticise you to make herself feel better. Ive got a sister like that, always been beautiful and slim, but envies my successes in life.

    Don't let her get to you!! Be proud of who you are and what you accomplish for yourself :bigsmile:
  • mommacuca
    mommacuca Posts: 19 Member
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    thanks everyone!! add me if you want to be friendson here! :)
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
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    Really? You're going to "give up" at 25 years old? How about being heathly and living long enough to see your child grow up?

    Screw your sister...you need to work on developing a thicker skin and to do this for YOU (and your child & husband if that helps motivate you more).

    Don't focus on how much you have TO GO. Set small goals and reward/celebrate those as you hit them. Its much easier to focus on the next 5 lb mark than the overall number. There are people on here who have lost 100+, and they haven't quit.

    Good luck to you!

    edit: by the way...super cute kid you have there!
  • JeSuisPrest
    JeSuisPrest Posts: 2,005 Member
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    thank you everyone, there are some post on here that I really loved but since im new dont know how to quote it and respond lol - but thank you very much

    Just click the quote button, its on the bottom right corner of the message you are reading.
  • htrl877
    htrl877 Posts: 49
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    THIS ISNT ABOUT YOUR SISTER THIS IS ABOUT YOU, LOSING WEIGHT TAKES DEDICATION AND HARD WORK AND IT CAN BE DONE WITH THE RIGHT FOCUS. WHO CARE WHAT SHE SAID, IT IS EASY FOR HER TO SAY MEAN THINGS BECAUSE SHE HAS NEVER BEEN IN YOUR POSITION. YOU CAN DO THIS, DONT GIVE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALSO GO LOOK UNDER SUCCES STORIES TAB, IF THEY CAN DO IT SO CAN YOU!

    BUMP +1!
  • Bakins929
    Bakins929 Posts: 895 Member
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    Don't pay any attention to her. And don't think it's impossible to drop 30 lbs! I used to think I could never drop even 20 lbs, but now I'm down 66 lbs!

    If you quit now, I can tell you exactly what will happen. You will gain even more, then if you ever try again, it will seem even more insurmountable and you will be even more likely to quit. Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do this! You are the only one who can stop yourself from reaching any goal.
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
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    So I'm up pumping- breastfeeding- and I was excited to come log my excercise because I just weiged in and I lost 3 lbs :) when the thought came to me "ahh who cares I'm fat anyway"-
    yesterday my super skinny model esq sister really hurt me and I really want to quit on here and stop trying to lose weight- Im 5'8 231lbs- the last time I was 197-196lbs was when I met my husabnd october of 2009- I just feel so done trying to lose weight, like accepting this is how I am and just not trying I just feel hopeless now - like "how am I going to do this. ugh 31 lbs to go? thats crazy- I dont know- she messed me up

    I'm broken

    do you want to be a bad example for your kids?!

    no!! you want to be happy and healthy and a good example... you need to decide for YOU not because your sister does or doesnt say anything!!

    we all know you can do it, you just need to believe in yourself!
  • Ralphrabbit
    Ralphrabbit Posts: 351 Member
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    and your sister as no issues that she is finding difficult?? How would she like you to comment on her issues I wonder? What is it about being overweight that makes the world think they have a right to comment on our issues?
    As has been said before, you are doing it for you, not your baby or sister, though you will enjoy your baby more if you can play with her more easily. By giving up & eating more we punish ourselves, not anyone else. Keep going & show everyone you think you are worth it!
  • fatty2fabby
    fatty2fabby Posts: 415 Member
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    use it as motivation babe!
    that was cruel of her especially if you're actually trying xx
  • wyangel
    wyangel Posts: 36
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    Don't pay any attention to her! You can do this - just stay on these boards and gain inspiration from them. And make some friends on here. These boards keep me going and are helping me shut up the fat voice in my own head that says I can't do it. But I'm sick and tired of feeling like this. We can do this! And remember we are all here for you.
  • jennajava
    jennajava Posts: 2,176 Member
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    bump
  • mommacuca
    mommacuca Posts: 19 Member
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    thank you so much everyone :)

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