afraid of all food - help me pick a system?

nyspotlight

Hello all,

female. 25. 5'6'' 180 pounds.

Hoping someone can help me here. A little over two years ago I moved from Boston to Los Angeles. In that first year here I gained 40-50 pounds. I did nothing differently at first. Then when I started gaining I dieted. I exercised. I tried freaking everything. And I mean that. I ran a marathon last December.

I'd give up when nothing worked.

Apart form "trying" here is me at my usual: Not hungry in the morning - alternating with waking up starving.
-starving at night starving. Usually eat cereal (and I mean whole grain Erewhon cereal)
-back and forth exercising religiously. then I get hurt and have to stop. or I get exhausted.
-sleep is not restful. ever. I wake up more exhausted.
-I am tired all day.
-I'm irritable.
-I'm hopeless. I feel like I'll never be better.
-I cry everyday when getting dressed.


I have a history of Anorexia (it's been 5-6 years since any of that). The only way I have every lost weight is by eating very little, with days of nothing in between. I have never lost weight in a healthy way. Ever. Despite many tries. This last week I freaked out. I am just so tired of it all. So tired. And everything makes me more tired. SO I ate next to nothing most days this last week. Then felt bad about doing that and ate my calories the last 2 days.

I tried using this site before with no luck. But what am I supposed to select? Sedentary because I'm so tired most of the time? Some days I'm out and about. Then the next day I'm too tired to move. And the brain fog - yeesh. And how much should I say I'll lose a week?

I'm pretty sure I have a thyroid issue (TSH tests .82 - 1.4, no other tests). And I've ordered Thyroid-S, but I'm going crazy now. I need something. Or else I'll keep not eating all week and eating on weekends and not getting work done.

Maybe someone has insight?

nyspotlight

I should also note that I have tried a green juice fast for 14 days - NO weight loss. At all.

I tried 2 parasite cleanses (herbal). No result for me. My girlfriend cleansed her parasites and candida and effortlessly dropped 20 pounds. She wasn't even trying. She fits into my old pants.

I did a month of dedicated turbo fire workouts. No luck.

I did McDougall - felt terrible. Almost 2 weeks on that and couldn't do it anymore.

I've also tried just listening to myself and not dieting. No change.

If I could just feel like I'm making some progress I think I could function, but this is breaking me.


Too much contradicting info. Eat. Don't eat. Eat STOP eat. Eat 6 small meals. Don't snack. Only snack. Carbs are good. Carbs are bad. Fat is good. Fat is bad. I can't pick something.


Oh - and before anyone gives advice, I should mention I'm a vegetarian who eats seafood (so a bad vegetarian). I've been that way for years.

sunkisses

Are you able to see a doctor? If yes, you need to be referred to an endocrinologist. Whatever's going on is too complex for me to give any sound advice. Sorry.

Beezil

Have you tried any kind of routine/regiment for longer than a month?

Sidesteal

I would seek medical assistance as soon as possible.

manderson27

I agree with other replies. I think your issues with food are too complex for general advice and suggest you speak to a professional.

There is no "system" just eat a variety of healthy food in reasonable portions and excercise in moderation. It seems you are making it far more complex than it is.

nyspotlight

I've seen a doctor. Doctors. They all take blood work and send me home. Tell me to eat 6 small meals. Or not eat so much (not that I do). Seeing GOOD doctor would be nice...

And I'm offended that you'd say I'm making it more complicate than it is. It must be nice to find it so "easy." But for me it isn't easy. If it were - I wouldn't be asking these questions, would I?

Beezil

I just wanted to ask again though, have you stuck with a diet plan, or exercise routine for more than a month?

Sidesteal

I've seen a doctor. Doctors. They all take blood work and send me home. Tell me to eat 6 small meals. Or not eat so much (not that I do). Seeing GOOD doctor would be nice...

And I'm offended that you'd say I'm making it more complicate than it is. It must be nice to find it so "easy." But for me it isn't easy. If it were - I wouldn't be asking these questions, would I?

Nobody said you were complicating things. Please re-read the replies. People are saying that this issue is "too complex", and I agree.

You are telling us that you are/have experienced an eating disorder and people are suggesting you seek professional help because this is beyond the scope of dietary advice from fitness nuts.

I would seek psychological help from a professional if your medical doctor is not helping you.

nyspotlight

Have you tried any kind of routine/regiment for longer than a month?

Yes, I have. Those were just my more recent things. I tried a balanced "Crazy Sexy Diet" (not really a "diet" per se - but a mostly vegan, kind of macrobiotic, lots-of-veggies type thing) for 4 months. I've also tried "intuitive eating with gentle nutrition" for 3 months.

Marathon training was a 9-month process, so exercise-wise that was 2 short runs during the week, one Loooooooong run on sundays, and some weights or yoga or something one or two other times a week most weeks. And trying to stay healthy with food.

It just seems now that every time I try something I'll read another article telling me that what I'm already trying is wrong. I can't be the only one who feels that way.

nyspotlight

I've seen a doctor. Doctors. They all take blood work and send me home. Tell me to eat 6 small meals. Or not eat so much (not that I do). Seeing GOOD doctor would be nice...

And I'm offended that you'd say I'm making it more complicate than it is. It must be nice to find it so "easy." But for me it isn't easy. If it were - I wouldn't be asking these questions, would I?

Nobody said you were complicating things. Please re-read the replies. People are saying that this issue is "too complex", and I agree.

Manderson27 did, actually - and I'm very sorry that I made it seem as though that were I general reply to all of you. I appreciate the rest of the comments.

And I am seeing someone psychologically. But, in all honesty, I would feel psychologically better if I just knew that something was on the right track. Does that make sense? Doctors tell me nothing. And therapy doesn't help my clothes fit. I just want to figure out a day-to-day plan for the meantime.

You are telling us that you are/have experienced an eating disorder and people are suggesting you seek professional help because this is beyond the scope of dietary advice from fitness nuts.

I would seek psychological help from a professional if your medical doctor is not helping you.
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Beezil

Yeah I mean I don't honestly know what to tell you - not trying to be mean at all but this is definitely something for a doctor to handle I think. If you're unhappy with your current doctor, perhaps yes you should find a new one.

nyspotlight

Yeah I mean I don't honestly know what to tell you - not trying to be mean at all but this is definitely something for a doctor to handle I think. If you're unhappy with your current doctor, perhaps yes you should find a new one.

I wish it were that easy. I'm at a university masters program and have to see the health center's NP's. And they are very very busy.

manderson27

I've seen a doctor. Doctors. They all take blood work and send me home. Tell me to eat 6 small meals. Or not eat so much (not that I do). Seeing GOOD doctor would be nice...

And I'm offended that you'd say I'm making it more complicate than it is. It must be nice to find it so "easy." But for me it isn't easy. If it were - I wouldn't be asking these questions, would I?

I apologise for my remark, of course you are not finding it easy. I just meant that you have complex issues and I can not help sorry I should not even have replied to this as I have obviously made you feel worse. Please accept my apologies and I shall remove myself from this thread at once.

PrincessEliNa

You're not a "bad vegetarian" you're a pescatarian ...<3

I honestly don't feel like I can give any good advice either, since I'm not an expert, but I would love to befriend you and give you encouragement if you decide to follow the My Fitness Pal program.

melaniecoyote

It is always a frustrating process, I feel like I have to eat under 1000 calories a day to lose any weight. You could have a gluten allergy or may not be getting enough protein (common issue for vegetarians). Stress could also be a factor. I have trouble sleeping when my plate is too full and my brain is on overload. Good luck.

nyspotlight

It is always a frustrating process, I feel like I have to eat under 1000 calories a day to lose any weight. You could have a gluten allergy or may not be getting enough protein (common issue for vegetarians). Stress could also be a factor. I have trouble sleeping when my plate is too full and my brain is on overload. Good luck.

I have also cut out gluten for a long period of time - no change in anything. Yet another thing I hoped would be the answer :-)

But thank you.

nyspotlight

I get that none of you can offer me deep, soul-level advice. But I'm not asking for that. I know that would be impossible.

I guess my confusion comes from - how many pounds should I input that I want to lose a week - will it make a huge metabolic difference considering my sluggish body? And should I say I am sedentary?

Proof of my slow metabolism: usual body temp is 96.0

Beezil

Dairy might be the problem too, if you have a dairy allergy - but I'm sure that's probably already been explored. I just know this girl a friend of mine, she didn't find out until she was in her mid-twenties that she had a dairy allergy, and once she cut it out of her diet she lost about 20lbs.

Beezil

I get that none of you can offer me deep, soul-level advice. But I'm not asking for that. I know that would be impossible.

I guess my confusion comes from - how many pounds should I input that I want to lose a week - will it make a huge metabolic difference considering my sluggish body? And should I say I am sedentary?

Proof of my slow metabolism: usual body temp is 96.0

I would go with sedentary unless you have a job where you're on your feet a lot throughout the day or moving around a lot, etc. And as far as how much weight you should put to lose per week, go with something reasonable like .25 or .5lb a week, that way you're not setting the bar too high.

nyspotlight

Dairy might be the problem too, if you have a dairy allergy - but I'm sure that's probably already been explored. I just know this girl a friend of mine, she didn't find out until she was in her mid-twenties that she had a dairy allergy, and once she cut it out of her diet she lost about 20lbs.

I did try that. I really thought I would miss the dairy, but that I didn't at all!

I don't eat it much anymore. But a lot of "fitness" people freak out when you say the word "vegan" or even "almost vegan" so I didn't put that. I do eat eggs a couple times a week.

My girlfriend seems to have a dairy allergy. Might be part of why she dropped all that weight. But I know she cheats and eats yogurt. :-) Of all the "cheat" foods!